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Who are you more afraid of?

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  • Who are you more afraid of?

    I don't know what all of you call your parents but who are you more afraid of?
    13
    mom (mama)
    38.46%
    5
    dad (baba)
    53.85%
    7
    equally afraid of both of them
    7.69%
    1

  • #2
    I was always so terrified of my dad. He took on the bad cop role. I was definitely scared straight as a kid because of him

    I still am, but he has chilled down a little since I was a kid.

    My brother seems to think my dad is scared of me too, I don't know where he gets that from


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    • #3
      This is a survey because I am actually curious to know if any body isn't more afraid of their dad. I've never seen that before.

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      • #4
        I'm on good terms with both my parents alhamdulilah but was scared of mum more growing up
        Each person has inside a basic decency and goodness. If he listens to it and acts on it, he is giving a great deal of what it is the world needs most. It is not complicated but it takes courage. It takes courage for a person to listen to his own goodness and act on it.

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        • #5
          Originally posted by eesa the kiwi View Post
          I'm on good terms with both my parents alhamdulilah but was scared of mum more growing up
          You didn't experience the joys of living with an Arab family member

          There was a very clear distinction between them.

          But as awful as it was I am glad that I was terrified of stepping out of line because it kept me out of a lot of trouble.

          Actually though when I think about my mom and her family, I don't think she will say it, but I think she was more afraid of her mom too. My grandma is very strong willed.

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          • #6
            Neither Alhamdulillaah.
            And with Him are the keys of the Ghayb (all that is hidden), none knows them but He. And He knows whatever there is in the land and in the sea; not a leaf falls, but He knows it. There is not a grain in the darkness of the earth nor anything fresh or dry, but is written in a Clear Record�
            [al-An�aam 6:59]

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            • #7
              My mother was quite scary growing up. She was fair, though.
              My father was scarier for sure (as fathers ought to be).

              Ah.... My eldest brother, though, was absolutely terrifying.
              He was like an enforcer that had a license to do whatever he wanted if we stepped out of line in any way, or when we'd made a mistake, and even sometimes when we hadn't. The truth is I held quite a bit of animosity against him for that all the way through my teens and into my early twenties.By then, he was much smaller than I was physically and he'd had a few kids of his own and had started to mellow.

              He had his reasons I guess, but he was one of those guys who always felt they could 'physically' fix people and situations. It took for him to be in his fourties to realise things don't work like that, and that not everyone thinks the same.


              (Note: Any parents or people in general, don't go bezerk on your kids when they do things wrong. Get them to understand their mistake and help them fix it if they can.)
              ​​Your du'aa... Always dear, always needed (Jazaa'akumullah Khair.)

              Comment


              • #8
                Abba
                Amma is scary too and can make my life really difficult, she thinks if she makes it hard for me, I will give in, may Allah reward them for their efforts. Ameen.

                ​​​​​​
                'Whatever it be wherein ye differ, the decision thereof is with Allah: such is Allah my Lord: In Him I trust, and to Him I turn.' The Holy Qu'ran Al Shura (Consultation)

                So, which of the favours of your lord will you deny? ~ Surah Ar Rahman

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                • #9
                  Originally posted by Fakhri-bin-Ali View Post
                  My mother was quite scary growing up. She was fair, though.
                  My father was scarier for sure (as fathers ought to be).

                  Ah.... My eldest brother, though, was absolutely terrifying.
                  He was like an enforcer that had a license to do whatever he wanted if we stepped out of line in any way, or when we'd made a mistake, and even sometimes when we hadn't. The truth is I held quite a bit of animosity against him for that all the way through my teens and into my early twenties.By then, he was much smaller than I was physically and he'd had a few kids of his own and had started to mellow.

                  He had his reasons I guess, but he was one of those guys who always felt they could 'physically' fix people and situations. It took for him to be in his fourties to realise things don't work like that, and that not everyone thinks the same.


                  (Note: Any parents or people in general, don't go bezerk on your kids when they do things wrong. Get them to understand their mistake and help them fix it if they can.)
                  I have an eldest brother who behaved similar to yours too. He still has that aura about him that scares me a little, when we lived in the same house. Now looking back, I think it could be the age gap that is wide which makes it difficult for me to get along adjust to a much older sibling.

                  It didn't help he didn't talk much either.

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                  • #10
                    My mum played bad cop, dad played good cop when I was younger. In my 13+ years, my mum was heavily suspicious and harsh on me for some reason.

                    She liked to think I'm one of those girls that sneaked around with boys after school without her knowing.

                    My dad was more into asking what type of interaction guys in school had with me, especially male teachers.

                    A part of me thinks mum makes bad assumptions out of thin air, but being the only daughter the focus on me is understandable. It could be something to do with her line of thinking about me, or what she had seen about girls that resembled me, which reminded her of that.
                    Last edited by nudgetheputri1; 04-06-21, 02:47 AM.

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                    • #11
                      Depends on the atmosphere.

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                      • #12
                        I’m surprised that so many of you have scarier moms 😟

                        I can truly say my mom is the nicest person I ever met and I’m not saying that just because she is my mom. She doesn’t talk about anyone or start any drama or anything and she doesn’t like to make people feel upset. She’s so innocent and cute. My brothers future wife is so lucky. She is going to get such a nice mother in law.

                        my parents are like fire and water. Their relationship makes no sense but some how they are ok. It’s very weird.

                        Comment


                        • #13
                          Originally posted by nudgetheputri1 View Post

                          I have an eldest brother who behaved similar to yours too. He still has that aura about him that scares me a little, when we lived in the same house. Now looking back, I think it could be the age gap that is wide which makes it difficult for me to get along adjust to a much older sibling.

                          It didn't help he didn't talk much either.
                          He had a lot on his shoulders from very young, being the one my parents relied on for pretty much running things in the family. The truth is, even though he made things tough, we were all afraid to do anything we shouldn't and because of that, it meant we stayed away from a ot of things others didn't.

                          Once he had his own children and they'd started to grow up a little, he started to change. I think he realised then that he needed to change his approach to get through to and not harm his own children, and of course that there was that natural softening of a person with parenthood and age.

                          He's changed now, Alhamdulillaah, even though that 'eldest brother' aura is still there, you can see now, that even back then, he was doing things the way he did out of thinking it was the right way to go about it. He's always had good intentions despite everything, and he's always made the most sacrifices from all of us, and borne the most responsibility... I just look back sometimes and think, man, you could have been a little easier on us.

                          We get on well these days, Alhamdulillaah, and have done for the last twelve or thirteen years. I'm probably closer to him in many ways than a lot of my other brothers. He's a different person to the one he was when younger. Alhamdulillaah.
                          Last edited by Fakhri-bin-Ali; 04-06-21, 12:22 PM.
                          ​​Your du'aa... Always dear, always needed (Jazaa'akumullah Khair.)

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                          • #14
                            I was more afraid of my mum, with my dad I wasn't scared, he never touched us girls but with my brothers he would beat them up lol
                            He was a softie, any tears and he would give in.

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                            • #15
                              Where's the fourth option? --> none

                              I don't remember being afraid of any of my parents while growing up..it was only later on during my late teen and early 20s that I really tested my mom's patience.. (sorry, mom I love you!)..she's one of my best friends, my mom..may Allah reward her and my dad and all our parents immensely and guide them upon The Truth, aameen

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