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Does Skin Colour Matter?????

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    Does Skin Colour Matter?????

    Well does it matter to you because a lot of muslim brothers these days want to marry muslim girls with very fair skin which i think is wrong. Most of you will say it doesn't matter as long as he/she is pious with a positive character and thats how it should be but if there were two identical girls/guys one light skin and the other dark skin would you close your eyes and pick one or say skin colour doesn't matter but if i had to choose it would be ________

    I was talking with my cousin today and she got a marriage proposal and she rejected the guy because he was to dark skinned because she's white like a ghost. I asked her is that not being biased??? She's like skin colour doesn't matter to me it's just my personal preference i was like :scratch: She's dumb thats all i can say about her.


    I don't want to offend anyone it's just a thought...........
    484
    No It Doesn't Matter As Long As The Individual Is Pious With A Positive Character
    58.47%
    283
    Yes It Makes A Differences To Me It's Personal Preference.....
    18.18%
    88
    I'm So Desperate I'll Take Anybody Please :D
    3.31%
    16
    Never Thought About It.....
    4.96%
    24
    I Don't Care...
    15.08%
    73
    Everyone thinks their a scholar because they know how to copy and paste, you get your ummah face on and the second you log out, you know your reality. Anyone can attain knowledge, how many can implement it?

    #2
    Re: Does Skin Colour Matter?????

    No it does not matter at all.

    Not one little bit.

    Nope.
    My Lord, my trust in all Your purposes is strong, That trust is now my shield; I'm safe, and undeceived.- Ali bin Husayn al-Habshi

    Real forsaking is forgetting the thing forsaken.- Shaykh al-Shadhili

    Live as long as you wish, you shall die. Love whatever you wish, you shall be separated from it. Do whatever you wish, you shall be rewarded for it. - Jibreel (as)

    ياَ أَبَا اَلزَّهْرَاء وَلَّذِي صَانَكْ- لاَتُخَيِّبْنَا يَا سِيْدِي نَحْنُ ضِيْفَانَكْ
    O father of Zahra, for the sake of the One who protected you,
    Please do not leave us disappointed, O master, we are your guests. - Shaykh Ahmad al-Alawi (rh)

    أَنتَ رَبّي وَ عِلْمُكَ حَسْبِيْ. فَنِعْمَ الرَّبُّ رَبِّي وَ نِعْمَ الحَسْبُ حَسْبِيْ.ـ حِزْبُ البَحْر

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      #3
      Re: Does Skin Colour Matter?????

      Originally posted by Chained_Water View Post
      No it does not matter at all.

      Not one little bit.

      Nope.
      I agree totally. Its a stupid thing to a base decision upon!
      .: Rufaida :.
      .:Fa Firroo Ila-llaah:.
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      “People praise you for what they suppose is in you,
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        #4
        Re: Does Skin Colour Matter?????

        i also say its stupid but it does have an effect, if its sum1's personal preferance and they are givin the oppertunity of 2 identicle people only diff, one light skinned one dark, its come to what that person likes i guess, coz remember one of the 4 charateristics is beuty right so if u happen to like light skinnned people more then thats you..but personally dark or light it dont matter!!!

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          #5
          Re: Does Skin Colour Matter?????

          Asalama alaykum wr wb

          I will Be Honest, skin color doesnt matter, people are people yes
          however i dont think those who have certain preferences should be i dont know whats the word but they shouldnt be made to feel bad.

          after all the intention behind the preference makes a big difference no?

          Personally i am not attracted to jet pale white brothers nor am i attracted to jet black/blue brothers. but then again thats a general statement regarding my preference it does change depending on the features. also even if it doesnt, it doesnt mean i dont love them for the sake of allah nor does it mean i would stand in the way of family, friends or my own children in the future if they preferred what i dont prefer.

          There is a thin line between preference and discrimination, we should acknowledge that.

          yes its stupid to dismiss a brother who was pious due to such preferences.and when put in that position i didnt, i think diin, aqlaaq, etc are all better criterias to judge by. however the other criterias are also allowed they are just not reccomended above the diin criteria.

          The same way i prefer taller brothers to short
          i prefer brothers who are mid way in complexion. however it doesnt matter if a particular bro didnt meet this preference, i disagree with shalow people who dismiss brothers and sisters based on them not meeting minor preferences like the one i mentioned.

          if anyone is going to comment on my post, pls re read it, understand it and see where am coming from, i hate people posting replies misunderstanding my initial point.

          I am not a racist nor a tribalist, i just have a particular preference.
          which when other important things over shadow it i would disregard it (preference).

          peace
          Last edited by Quest; 24-02-07, 01:48 AM.
          " Whoever abandones jihad in order to be safe from fitnah, then he has already fallen into fitnah that is a result of doubts in his heart, sickness of his mind and his abandoning jihad that Allah ordered him!" Ibn Taymeeyah r/a

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            #6
            Re: Does Skin Colour Matter?????

            I agree with anna & CW here, what a shallow way of being attracted to someone subhanaAllah.

            You can choose someone for their good looks its permissable but what has skin colour got anything to do with being attractive physically. The prophet (saw) said pick the pious woman, but placing your decision solely on how light her skin colour is pretty retarded.

            It's whats underneath the skin that matters everything else meaningless.
            "It is He who sent to an illiterate people a messenger from amongst themselves, reciting to them His signs and purifying them and teaching them the Book and the wisdom even though before they were clearly in error." [Soorah al-Jumu`ah (62):2]

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              #7
              Re: Does Skin Colour Matter?????

              ...of course not ...

              Is there anything in any of the holy books that say so? .... coffee, caramel, mocha, milk ... skin tones are beautiful ...

              I'm speckled by the way .... :up:

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                #8
                Re: Does Skin Colour Matter?????

                I've found people that are extremely sensitive over this, even talking about it.

                Like Quest said above, people's preferences can be based on any physical aspect such as their eyes, their height, their weight, their lips, their physique and even their complexion. More than often, the idea of skin colour as a preference can automatically fall into the 'racist' bracket, that's why people have an extra layer of sensitivity regarding it.

                It's not always as simple as "skin colour"; it could mean just their complexion. I.e. are they dark, are they light? And sometimes it can very well mean "are they black or white?".

                I can understand why some people are sensitive about even mentioning the skin aspect (because of its links with racism), but everyone has their own preference - and as long as that preference is not judgemental, then there isn't nothing wrong with it IMO. Every man and woman on this Earth has an image of their ideal partner, there's nothing wrong in describing that image.

                But with this complexion thing; it's ancient. Every culture thinks the lighter the complexion, the more attractive, especially in regards to women - I hear alot of Muslim women are dismissed because their complexion isn't light enough for the man's preference :scratch:

                But this talk is all based on looks. There's more to being a husband/wife than looks - they fade away in time.
                If you read this closely enough you might spot the secret message hidden in it

                Mr President, You Are Wrong

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                  #9
                  Re: Does Skin Colour Matter?????

                  Originally posted by ADZ w3 View Post
                  i also say its stupid but it does have an effect, if its sum1's personal preferance and they are givin the oppertunity of 2 identicle people only diff, one light skinned one dark, its come to what that person likes i guess, coz remember one of the 4 charateristics is beuty right so if u happen to like light skinnned people more then thats you..but personally dark or light it dont matter!!!
                  heres the problem tho, what makes light skin women the definition of beauty?

                  i have seen some darker sisters with much better features then some light skin sisters.

                  features is what symbolises 'beauty' IMO
                  but i do believe based on what i see that color does compliment beauty.

                  hence why darker people use powder to look a bit lighter
                  and white people get tans.

                  there is a reason behind why they do this, after all beauty is relative and everyone has their definition of whats beauty.
                  " Whoever abandones jihad in order to be safe from fitnah, then he has already fallen into fitnah that is a result of doubts in his heart, sickness of his mind and his abandoning jihad that Allah ordered him!" Ibn Taymeeyah r/a

                  Comment


                    #10
                    Re: Does Skin Colour Matter?????

                    Originally posted by Quest View Post
                    heres the problem tho, what makes light skin women the definition of beauty?
                    Originally posted by Quest View Post

                    i have seen some darker sisters with much better features then some light skin sisters.

                    features is what symbolises 'beauty' IMO
                    but i do believe based on what i see that color does compliment beauty.

                    hence why darker people use powder to look a bit lighter
                    and white people get tans.

                    there is a reason behind why they do this, after all beauty is relative and everyone has their definition of whats beauty.
                    Sis, I think it's because darker colours is seen as more masculine and hence why it's associated with men, and not women.

                    It's the same sentiment as to why most women would want a taller husband. It's all preference.
                    Last edited by Kal-El; 24-02-07, 01:58 AM.
                    If you read this closely enough you might spot the secret message hidden in it

                    Mr President, You Are Wrong

                    Comment


                      #11
                      Re: Does Skin Colour Matter?????

                      Kal like i said, there is a thin line between preference and discrimination.
                      this thin line can be seen when the intention behind the preference is made known.

                      many people dislike these topics because it brings sensitivities to come to surface. these sensitivities are due to the train of thought the subject produced. in my opinion, unless the intention behind such subjects or the one stating their view in such subjects isnt made clear, the whole subject can become controversial, in that many people will respond to the subject based on an implication they derived from whats said, an implication by the way not neccessarily pointed to by the text in itself, but rather presumptions made abt the text.

                      i have seen this happen many times, the above is based on observations i have made in the past.

                      Peace
                      " Whoever abandones jihad in order to be safe from fitnah, then he has already fallen into fitnah that is a result of doubts in his heart, sickness of his mind and his abandoning jihad that Allah ordered him!" Ibn Taymeeyah r/a

                      Comment


                        #12
                        Re: Does Skin Colour Matter?????

                        I have an honest question for people.


                        I hear about skin color, but in many countries there are same ethnic people with same language, same culture with two different skin colors....


                        If you were a kashmiri pakistani light skin bro would you marry a darker pakistani sister? and vice versa...

                        even from where I come from (somalia) we are ONE people but yet you would be suprised the differen shade of skin color there is amongst us.


                        Skin color is not the issue in most cases, what it tends to be is people's fanatic obsession with their foreign traditions of looking down at people from different cultures.. its disgusting.

                        and not last of all, its also unislamic.
                        Abu Hamzah Anas bin Malik, radiyallahu 'anhu, reported that the Prophet, sallallahu 'alayhi wasallam, said:
                        "None of you truly believes (in Allah and in His religion) until he loves for his brother what he loves for himself"

                        Comment


                          #13
                          Re: Does Skin Colour Matter?????

                          Originally posted by Kal-El View Post

                          Sis, I think it's because darker colours is seen as more masculine and hence why it's associated with men, and not women.

                          It's the same sentiment as to why most women would want a taller husband. It's all preference.
                          lol more masculine? Now thats a 1st i have never heard this b4 are u serious?

                          i thought some chicks liked taller men because its an old fashioned mindset . some people are under the notion that the man must be taller and older than the woman. i have never heard the woman must be fairer then the men, this isnt an old fashioned mindset its a mindset which mainly became widespread during the colonial times.
                          " Whoever abandones jihad in order to be safe from fitnah, then he has already fallen into fitnah that is a result of doubts in his heart, sickness of his mind and his abandoning jihad that Allah ordered him!" Ibn Taymeeyah r/a

                          Comment


                            #14
                            Re: Does Skin Colour Matter?????

                            Originally posted by abdusamad View Post
                            I have an honest question for people.


                            I hear about skin color, but in many countries there are same ethnic people with same language, same culture with two different skin colors....


                            If you were a kashmiri pakistani light skin bro would you marry a darker pakistani sister? and vice versa...

                            even from where I come from (somalia) we are ONE people but yet you would be suprised the differen shade of skin color there is amongst us.


                            Skin color is not the issue in most cases, what it tends to be is people's fanatic obsession with their foreign traditions of looking down at people from different cultures.. its disgusting.

                            and not last of all, its also unislamic.
                            I think somalis have more problems inregards to tribalism then skin color.
                            " Whoever abandones jihad in order to be safe from fitnah, then he has already fallen into fitnah that is a result of doubts in his heart, sickness of his mind and his abandoning jihad that Allah ordered him!" Ibn Taymeeyah r/a

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                              #15
                              Re: Does Skin Colour Matter?????

                              Originally posted by Quest View Post
                              I think somalis have more problems inregards to tribalism then skin color.


                              I honestly believe skin color plays little role in people's mind. On the other hand i believe it is different cultures which people dislike and as a result tend to take it out on the person instead of his culture.
                              Abu Hamzah Anas bin Malik, radiyallahu 'anhu, reported that the Prophet, sallallahu 'alayhi wasallam, said:
                              "None of you truly believes (in Allah and in His religion) until he loves for his brother what he loves for himself"

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