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Lonely, depressed and seeking friendship/advice/duas (ya girl is desperate)

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  • Lonely, depressed and seeking friendship/advice/duas (ya girl is desperate)

    Salaam alaykum sisters,

    I don't even know where to begin. I created my account today out of desperation.

    I'm in my late twenties, single and on my deen. I moved to a new city over a year ago. I didn't want to leave but it was that or sticking around with other toxic family and staying stagnant. So I moved and started a new life abruptly. Mind you the city I moved from is much bigger and there's more to do/etc. I'd also like to add that I've struggled with mental health, my weight, moving, toxic family, and so much more. I've had depression, anxiety and OCD for years now. I've sought help here and there but it's always stopped. That's due to financial reasons mainly. Anyway, I've moved to this new town and I've got some family here. Long story short I got into an ugly fight with family and I've been cut off. I'd also say I cut them off as well. This was due to petty reasons and inner family issues. Problem is they were my only friends and people I could talk to. I have no friends here and try keeping in touch with ones back in my old city. It's not always easy and doesn't feel the same as before. I'm living with my mom now and we're not always the closest. I feel so isolated especially with COVID. I'm dealing with mental health issues, weight problems, loneliness, and feeling down because of circumstance. Life was so different just a year ago. I'd also like to add I don't currently have my own car. I was in a better place a year ago and I didn't even realize it then. I'm not considering taking my life at all. Alhamdulilah it hasn't gotten anywhere near that. I'm seeking some advice, duas, and friendship. I'd appreciate anything even if it's just a kind word of advice. I really hope to make some friends here and support everyone as much I can. I know it's not been easy for so many this year. If there's anyone who would like to talk I'm all ears. Nice to meet you all btw. Hope you're all doing well

    Looking forward to hearing from you ladies

  • #2
    Walikumssalam Sister,
    I created my account today as well. I am also struggling with life. Just like you my relationship with my father is not pleasant. Me, my siblings and my mother has been dealing with this for a long time. Sometimes it is really difficult to even open up to someone as every one judges you. Please keep to your prayer, remember Allah all the time.
    Ask Allah to give you guidance. Allah is the only one who can help us. You are not alone. We are all being tested in different ways.
    thank you

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    • #3
      SubhanAllah sis. I know what that can feel like. May Allah ease your situation and create peace between your family. Thank you for your kind message. I’m going to try turning to Allah and making more dua. I always feel reluctant to but will try making more iA. Thanks again sis. May Allah bless you and give you good

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      • #4
        Walakum asalam

        I’m sorry to hear you’ve been through all that. Life is full of so many trials and they really suck sometimes but just remember to stay strong and think positively. I know it’s hard but these things will make you stronger. Sometimes the things that seem awful end up being the best things that could have ever happened to you. You know the rainbow after the storm. Sorry if I sound like a cringey life coach.

        Anyways this place isn’t super busy but you can always hang around. There are a lot of nice people on here.

        may allah keep you strong and make things easy for you.

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        • #5
          Sisters feel free to message me if you need someone to talk to. Preferably send me your email or facebook

          Comment


          • #6
            Originally posted by aelmo View Post
            Walakum asalam

            I’m sorry to hear you’ve been through all that. Life is full of so many trials and they really suck sometimes but just remember to stay strong and think positively. I know it’s hard but these things will make you stronger. Sometimes the things that seem awful end up being the best things that could have ever happened to you. You know the rainbow after the storm. Sorry if I sound like a cringey life coach.

            Anyways this place isn’t super busy but you can always hang around. There are a lot of nice people on here.

            may allah keep you strong and make things easy for you.
            Ameen thank you sis! That wasn’t cringe at all. I appreciate your kind words of advice and duas. All of what you said is very true. May Allah bless you

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            • #7
              Originally posted by Zareena2015 View Post
              Sisters feel free to message me if you need someone to talk to. Preferably send me your email or facebook
              Thank you sis! I appreciate your support and kindness ❤️ I’ll be sure to reach out

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              • #8
                I know this sounds obvious but spend time turning to Allah (swt). Be regular in your salah and talk to Him in your duas. I'd also recommend reading stuff by Ibn al Qayyim- his work is amazing, timeless and quite uplifting. Usually I'd suggest to people to spend time on hobbies, interests, going for walks in natural parks. I'd also usually suggest joining an evening class partly to learn something you're interested in and partly to meet new people, but I'm guessing with covid that isn't practical.

                Feel free to interact with people on this forum as well. Some sections of the forum do have petty squabbles and arguments but don't let that put you off. Overall I think it's worth sticking around just to be in the company of Muslims.
                The Lyme Disease pandemic: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z5u73ME4sVU

                Comment


                • #9
                  Originally posted by neelu View Post
                  I know this sounds obvious but spend time turning to Allah (swt). Be regular in your salah and talk to Him in your duas. I'd also recommend reading stuff by Ibn al Qayyim- his work is amazing, timeless and quite uplifting. Usually I'd suggest to people to spend time on hobbies, interests, going for walks in natural parks. I'd also usually suggest joining an evening class partly to learn something you're interested in and partly to meet new people, but I'm guessing with covid that isn't practical.

                  Feel free to interact with people on this forum as well. Some sections of the forum do have petty squabbles and arguments but don't let that put you off. Overall I think it's worth sticking around just to be in the company of Muslims.
                  Thank you for the response sis. I appreciate you taking the time and sharing with me. In sha Allah khayr. I will try my best trying to get closer to Allah and the Deen. I think this is a good opportunity to

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    Sis are there any local mosques near you? Maybe you can go there to meet other Muslim women and make some friends? See if there is a Facebook group for Muslim women in the city also? Same for work, anyone there you can be friends with?

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                    • #11
                      Originally posted by YenEve View Post
                      Sis are there any local mosques near you? Maybe you can go there to meet other Muslim women and make some friends? See if there is a Facebook group for Muslim women in the city also? Same for work, anyone there you can be friends with?
                      I would like to visit the local mosque but I think there’s limited opening with covid. I also don’t want to risk infection and get family members ill. I’m going to look into groups for Muslim women. I know there’s some on FB. I have some friends at work but it’s a friendly work type relationship. i.e. salaam, how are you, praying together

                      thanks for all the helpful tips 🙏🏾

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                      • #12
                        Salam Sister,
                        how are you doing? Have you started looking for a job yet in your New city? I would also like to advice you that at some point please try to restore your relationship with your parents at least. Good or bad these are the only parents you have got. And You are blessed that you still have them in your life as opposed thousands of brothers and sisters who are orphan. Be patient and try to make the first attempt in restoring your relationship with them. When you take one step towards doing something good, Allah will make it easy for you.
                        you are always in my prayers. Please pray for me as well.
                        thank you

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                        • #13
                          I understand you, read Al-Fatiha more often, I ask Allah to help you, I will make a dua for you. My sister and mother also suffer from mental disorders, you are not alone, everything will be fine, inshallah.

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                          • #14
                            Richard323 Female only thread weirdooo!

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