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how is abortion haraam

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  • #16
    Re: how is abortion haraam

    if you cant deal with the consquences of your actions...dont have sex..simple

    abortion isnt a get-out-of-jail card, yes you've done something haraam...REPENT..and dont repeat it....dont think that you've already done something wrong so its okay to carry on and do whatever you want, what kind of reckless attitude is that?

    your parents wont let u marry him? tell them ur pregnant..i'm sure that'll change things

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    • #17
      Re: how is abortion haraam

      Originally posted by tellmestr8 View Post
      did you not even read my last post? How can we support the child? we arent even married, and i dont have a wali that will let me get married so any so called nikkah will be invalid and we will be living in zina as we are now (i dont live with him). also our families will kick us out and will never accept the pregnancy. the guy isnt even educated or anything hes still in uni we cant even support ourselves let alone a baby. all 3 lives will be ruined, but especially the baby cos we will offer it a shi* life.

      i apologise for saying "why not another". it came out wrong, i was crying at the time, im so sad .
      yeah sis i read it. not to be heartless or anything but so what... so if you have this baby you will not be well off. u are not going to starve in this country, u can apply for whatever benefits u need. if ur parents throw u out u wil have to live in a very basic accomodation, not having a good lifestyle but it is better for u to suffer that than to hav another abortion..
      if u make tawbah sincerely and turn back towards Allah then Allah will also turn towards u. if u go to Him walking He comes to u @ speed... He will make things okay for u, u will get thru it BUT u have to make tawbah and u have to leave these sins behind.
      And insha allah do try to get married to this person asap so ur kid will b legitimate like some ppl have mentioned.
      Allah can make the situation easier on u, but u have to have tawakkul for that.
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      • #18
        Re: how is abortion haraam

        your child has rights too, it had rights before it was conceived. to be born of married parents, parents who fear Allah ta ala, and now the price it will pay is to be murdered by its mother ?! what are you thinking of ? yourself only well boo hoo poor you, you fornicated with a brother because you were not brave enough to confront your parents about making the marriage work and explaining yourselves in an open and honest manner, but you were brave enough to disobey Allah ta ala behind closed doors, and do the most disgusting and degranding act, to fornicate with each other.. how brave and foolish you are to confront your Rabb with such grevious crimes on your records.

        your first child, your parents first innocent grandchild, paid the price.. what will your parents say if you told them you murdered not only your first but second child too.. get a grip on yourself, take the man who has been assisting you in your crimes, and both of you stand up and speak the truth, as the prophet :saw: said "speak the truth, even if it is against yourself " dont murder another muslim baby, that is our brother or sister in islam, and we are standing up and speaking out for its right to live, and we will bear witness against you if you kill and murder this innocent child, who is free of what its parents have done. repent to Allah before it is too late for you, stand up and confront the issue head on, deal with it, repent, and Allah will assist you to make ammends insha Allah, if you are sincere.

        you both need to go to your local imam together and get some advice and islamic rulings clearly explained about your situation. may Allah ta ala forgive and guide u and all of us amin.

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        • #19
          Re: how is abortion haraam

          If you are that much too scared to stand up to your parents and marry this man, have the baby in secret (medically supervised!!!!! ask the midwives and doctors not to notify any family of the pregnancy or birth and tell them you want to have the baby adopted and not inform your family of the pregnancy - can't be that much more difficult than having an abortion in secret. wear baggy clothes and pretend to go to weightwatchers or something - not that this kind of deciet is Islamic, but its better than killing your baby) and then put the baby up for adoption. There are PLENTY of Muslim parents who long to have a child of their own who would gratefully and gladly raise your child. Even many who already have children of their own would raise this child.

          I find it incredibly tragic that in this very forum there are threads started by childless married people desperate for babies, one even asking if surrogacy is halal or not cause they want a baby that much, and at the same time you are asking if you can kill your unborn child. If you don't want to stand up to you parents and marry this man, or raise your child single handedly, at least don't kill the child, put him or her up for adoption inshaAllah.
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          • #20
            Re: how is abortion haraam

            I am glad I came to this forum. I dont have any friends in real life so you guys are my friends.

            After reading what you all had to say and thinking in the mosque today, i said to myself "you idiot".

            i wont spill sugar from my mouth. i commited zina, have already had an abortion, and am unmarried to my guy.

            HOWEVER, the shaytaan deceived me. i am alive, so is my guy and we CAN STILL ASK FOR FORGIVENESS AND TRY AND CORRECT THINGS. THERE IS STILL A CHANCE, EVEN A SMALL ONE.


            no my guy wanted to marry me from day one, its his family that are against it they even refuse to meet or talk to my mother. he cannot force them to do what he wants, especially because he is not settled in life (no good job, career, degree education, or house) and thats even more reason for his parents to say not get married.

            my guy is a warrior and hes wanted to marry me since day one and he takes care of me in so many ways - even if i dont realise it half the time cos he is hardly with me.

            inshaAllah we are going to get married. he is going to move out, get a job and after that return to education. we need to correct things


            thank you all for the advice.

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            • #21
              Re: how is abortion haraam

              wel cos the guy doesnt need a wali to get him married, if one of ur parents was to b against it then its better this way round? i kno he has to obey parents but if u realy fear u wil fal into zina it becomes obligatory to get married, so doesnt it apply 2 him.
              dont wait til he has move out got job etc etc to get married. just get the marriage done now and if u have to wait to start a proper married life living together etc etc then u have to wait but atleast u wil b married. for ur babies sake its very important as im sure they wil prefer 2 grow up not regarded as illegitamate
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              • #22
                Re: how is abortion haraam

                Assalamu'alaikum,

                Instead of carrying on committing zina.... you both should come clean and then your families won't have a problem with getting you married off, because have given them no choice to oppose to. and about the fact that your family won't talk to you... would his family even take you in? forget that would you both get respect within the family after the whole generation knowing wot you two committed? i dnt think your 'guy' is soo much of a 'warrior' if he got you pregnant, knowing the consequences.

                all i can say sis..... i will make dua for you and inshallah you will get married to the brother and be able to raise your child.... dealing with what comes your way with ease.

                Allah swt only gives you what you can bear

                Walaikum'salaam
                :up: SISTAAAAAAAAA :up:

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                • #23
                  Re: how is abortion haraam

                  Originally posted by tellmestr8 View Post
                  I am glad I came to this forum. I dont have any friends in real life so you guys are my friends.

                  After reading what you all had to say and thinking in the mosque today, i said to myself "you idiot".

                  i wont spill sugar from my mouth. i commited zina, have already had an abortion, and am unmarried to my guy.

                  HOWEVER, the shaytaan deceived me. i am alive, so is my guy and we CAN STILL ASK FOR FORGIVENESS AND TRY AND CORRECT THINGS. THERE IS STILL A CHANCE, EVEN A SMALL ONE.


                  no my guy wanted to marry me from day one, its his family that are against it they even refuse to meet or talk to my mother. he cannot force them to do what he wants, especially because he is not settled in life (no good job, career, degree education, or house) and thats even more reason for his parents to say not get married.

                  my guy is a warrior and hes wanted to marry me since day one and he takes care of me in so many ways - even if i dont realise it half the time cos he is hardly with me.

                  inshaAllah we are going to get married. he is going to move out, get a job and after that return to education. we need to correct things


                  thank you all for the advice.

                  Good for you, and may Allah grant you his forgiveness and blessings if you really do see the errors of your ways now...however I agree with the other sisters, you should marry him as soon as you can, no need to wait for him to move out and etc, talk to your parents since you will need your dad to be your Wali...I understand that this may be difficult, since I've read of cases where parents make their unweded daughters abort the baby instead of marrying her to the man, because they want to keep the family honor and etc, this is wrong!!! anyways if there are reasons for u not to trust your parents on this matter (just incase), do go to a local mosque or an islamic institute near your area and get help as soon as possible...do not wait a day longer.
                  All the best to you, I hope you go on to do the right thing Inshaallah.
                  The Prophet :saw: said: "The Muslim Ummah is a unique Ummah among the whole of mankind: Their Land is one, their War is one, their Peace is one, their Honor is one and their Trust is one." (Ahmed)

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                  • #24
                    Re: how is abortion haraam

                    Originally posted by sameena-k View Post
                    Assalamu'alaikum,

                    Instead of carrying on committing zina.... you both should come clean and then your families won't have a problem with getting you married off, because have given them no choice to oppose to. and about the fact that your family won't talk to you... would his family even take you in? forget that would you both get respect within the family after the whole generation knowing wot you two committed? i dnt think your 'guy' is soo much of a 'warrior' if he got you pregnant, knowing the consequences.

                    all i can say sis..... i will make dua for you and inshallah you will get married to the brother and be able to raise your child.... dealing with what comes your way with ease.

                    Allah swt only gives you what you can bear

                    Walaikum'salaam
                    nah he is a true warrior. hes kind, gentle and silently tougher than 99.9% of those so called 'men' out there. yes we committed zina, but we made a mistake, and at least his is man enough to admit it and try and sort it out, unlike the pathetic little boys out there. your comments make it sound like you dont want this to happen? your insecurity is shining sameena-k.

                    from what i recall that i said in my previous post, was that we realised we made a mistake, we know that an abortion is not a way out and he is going to sort it out.

                    yes we will move out do dua for us inshaAllah, we will just have to take life as it comes, but inshaAllah I hope he finishes of his education because i know he can be an even greater man than he is now

                    Comment


                    • #25
                      Re: how is abortion haraam

                      [QUOTE=tellmestr8;2801994]did you not even read my last post? How can we support the child? we arent even married, and i dont have a wali that will let me get married so any so called nikkah will be invalid and we will be living in zina as we are now (i dont live with him). also our families will kick us out and will never accept the pregnancy. the guy isnt even educated or anything hes still in uni we cant even support ourselves let alone a baby. all 3 lives will be ruined, but especially the baby cos we will offer it a shi* life.

                      when u knew that you wouldnt be able to get married and that both families are unhappy then why the heck did u carry on with him? lemme ges---U LUV HIM!!bul****!! let alone look after a bby, both of you seem u cant look after ur ownself then y the hell did you open ur legs!! shame on2 !! u desrv everyfn u get in lyf, dont punish ur bby for it! keep it girl..remeber wr gna di one day..nt stay forever..weve got our creator to answer to?? hus given the right to u to take away life??sis im beggin ere..jus plz dnt kill..ma eyes are flowin with tears and am sorry for being so angry at u but sis plz jus dnt kill that sweetheart insyd u! think about them peeps hu cant have kids?? ur that bbys mom..just think hunii..plz??

                      may allah have mercy on u and the rst of the ummah and safeguard us from any fitnah!!

                      Comment


                      • #26
                        Re: how is abortion haraam

                        when u knew that you wouldnt be able to get married and that both families are unhappy then why the heck did u carry on with him? lemme ges---U LUV HIM!!bul****!! let alone look after a bby, both of you seem u cant look after ur ownself then y the hell did you open ur legs!! shame on2 !! u desrv everyfn u get in lyf, dont punish ur bby for it! keep it girl..remeber wr gna di one day..nt stay forever..weve got our creator to answer to?? hus given the right to u to take away life??sis im beggin ere..jus plz dnt kill..ma eyes are flowin with tears and am sorry for being so angry at u but sis plz jus dnt kill that sweetheart insyd u! think about them peeps hu cant have kids?? ur that bbys mom..just think hunii..plz??

                        may allah have mercy on u and the rst of the ummah and safeguard us from any fitnah!![/QUOTE]

                        no, i wanted to marry him because i know there is nothing wrong with marrying him, it is the families who are wrong, to refuse on culture and race is BS. and yes i do love him and YES THERE CAN BE LOVE BEFORE MARRIAGE, especially with the intention of marriage. tell me ONE PLACE IN ISLAM THAT SAYS THERE IS NOT LOVE BEFORE MARRIAGE.

                        a hadith says that our Prophet saw said "if 2 people are in love, there is no better thing for them than marriage".

                        your speaking profound nonsense and how dare you talk to me like that you imbecile.

                        and before you get overly emotional, read through the thread (all of it) properly before you start shedding tears.

                        Comment


                        • #27
                          Re: how is abortion haraam

                          :start:

                          :salams

                          Originally posted by tellmestr8 View Post
                          nah he is a true warrior. hes kind, gentle and silently tougher than 99.9% of those so called 'men' out there. yes we committed zina, but we made a mistake, and at least his is man enough to admit it and try and sort it out, unlike the pathetic little boys out there. your comments make it sound like you dont want this to happen? your insecurity is shining sameena-k.
                          lay off the sister, you get me?

                          and tell your warrior to keep his pants zipped


                          if he's a 'nice' man, he'll marry you, raise your child and stand up instead of hitting at it like a pair of jahil selfish kids

                          have you no shame?

                          i swear by Allah have you no shame?

                          you kill your own child, then come on a public forum wanting justification for killing another

                          Wallahi have you no shame?
                          and you dare mock others when you decide to kill a baby or two

                          :ahb: i'm finding it hard to breathe

                          what is the difference between you and the soldier who goes to a house in iraq and kills a family in cold-blooded fashion?


                          Originally posted by tellmestr8 View Post

                          yes we will move out do dua for us inshaAllah, we will just have to take life as it comes, but inshaAllah I hope he finishes of his education because i know he can be an even greater man than he is now
                          you do not deduce a man by the level of his education, a man becomes a man by following as much of the Sunnah of RasoolAllah Peace and Blessings of Allah be upon him and his family.

                          continue killing your children and you will suffer mental problems because these actions are so negative they mess one's entire brain, people get psychological problems and if you ever think these sort of actions resolve anything, they don't, they make it worse.

                          i'm telling you as it is, don't pick a fight with me understand cuz i swear by Allah just don't. i don't want to fight with you but i'm telling you as it is, this isn't a rosy fairytale, :ahb: my heart trembles when i think you've killed one child and you're ready to do it again and for what?

                          you think this guy will marry you and want you to be the mother of his children by doing stuff like this? do you want a two bit guy who doesn't care how many babies you kill as the father of your future children?


                          this is the 'kind, gentle & silent' man you're talking about

                          :sub: :(
                          i feel like crying how could you do this? and what sort of man enabled you to kill his child?

                          you will never find justification for killing a child in Islam and even normal people on ummah forum will & have told you this

                          Fear Allah Fear Allah Fear Allah


                          :wswrwb:
                          Last edited by .: Anna :.; 27-09-08, 12:18 AM. Reason: fixing smiley problem
                          Allah and His angels call down blessings on the Prophet . O you who believe! call down blessings on him and ask for complete peace and safety for him :inlove: (33:56)

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                          • #28
                            Re: how is abortion haraam

                            My sister I pray that Allaah (swT) makes it easy for you both, Ameen.

                            Ma'aSalaama

                            Comment


                            • #29
                              Re: how is abortion haraam

                              Originally posted by sameena-k View Post
                              Assalamu'alaikum,

                              Instead of carrying on committing zina.... you both should come clean and then your families won't have a problem with getting you married off, because have given them no choice to oppose to. and about the fact that your family won't talk to you... would his family even take you in? forget that would you both get respect within the family after the whole generation knowing wot you two committed? i dnt think your 'guy' is soo much of a 'warrior' if he got you pregnant, knowing the consequences.all i can say sis..... i will make dua for you and inshallah you will get married to the brother and be able to raise your child.... dealing with what comes your way with ease.

                              Allah swt only gives you what you can bear

                              Walaikum'salaam
                              come on sammy, u know people make mistakes, and it it is easy to get tempted, true some mess up harder than others but let him without sin throw the first stone and all that!

                              Alhamdulillah there are so many sisters that start practicing at a young age so never have to deal with this problem, and many sisters that have families that raise them to have taqwa, but this is what happens when you dont.
                              Also if your family have no islamic reason to prevent you from marriage to your choice of husband (race is not an Islamic reason) you can change your wali.
                              As i understand it they've already told their families they want to get married and their families have said no.

                              ALso what has respect in the family got to do with anything? |Should she not get married because she wont have respect within the family?
                              SHould she not involve the family and go far away and get married amongst strangers in a mosque because of this?
                              If you leave out the family now, the chances of them coming round are less.

                              Many families say they wont talk to you then after a while inshallah come round.

                              Everyone knows someone who has comitted Zina, probably some of you in your immediate family (bros, sis, dad). We all know this is wrong, but we also know because someone is deviant in one aspect of their behaviour, doesnt ake them deviant overall.

                              We also know that whoever repents is forgiven by Allah, and this is the month of ramadhan with infinite mercy.

                              Congrats on ur upcoming marriage anonymous1990, (i rekon u may have given away ur age with that!) Remember the child will come with its own rizk, and Allah will provide for you. Don't worry about money. Or others opinions. It is the opinion of Allah that matters and only he knows your struggle and what is in you rheart good and bad, so repent sincerely from your sins, and concentrate on bringing up your child.

                              Recipes for all the family :inlove:
                              (and you thought I was a lazy feminazi which can't cook?)

                              Comment


                              • #30
                                Re: how is abortion haraam

                                Islamic girl, please read all the thread starters posts, she's already said that we're right and she was being a fool and she's going to do sincere tawbah and not have an abortion. So having a go at her about that still isn't going to achieve anything. Instead give her advice about seeking tawbah and about how to go about marrying this brother inshaAllah. He has to make tawbah too, because he's just as guilty for what went on in the past, and he's got just as much right to realise the mistakes in the past and move on as the sister posting here has.

                                Please remember this is an advice forum, praise Allah that the sister has taken the sincere advice offered her :) May Allah make it easy for this sister, and the brother, to get married and stay on the straight path and raise this child to be a pious and righteous Muslim AMEEN
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