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  • Hurt

    I have been an overweight girl all my life, my mother has been the biggest bully I have had to face while fighting all the other battles.
    Alhumdulillah Allah has picked me up and gave me strength time and again, and I trust in Him that he will take me through.

    I am distraught and suicidal but I trust my Rab.
    Last edited by Willnevergiveup; 12-02-20, 10:59 PM.

  • #2
    Jazak Allah khair for the replies
    Last edited by Willnevergiveup; 12-02-20, 10:59 PM.


    • #3
      I'm sorry to hear that. No one should have to deal with someone belittling them all the time. I don't understand how a mother could do that.

      Don't let her or anyone else put you down. And don't turn down proposals either, I know plenty of overweight people who are married. Some people aren't so shallow.

      What your mom probably doesn't realize is that her putting you down all the time is probably making your weight issue worse. Just don't listen to her. These people who are so fixated on appearances clearly have something wrong with them.

      May Allah keep you steadfast and strong against anyone who tries to upset you.


      • #4
        Originally posted by Willnevergiveup View Post
        By involving my uncle into this, she's making it (my obesity) look like a family emergency. I am afraid by the time she's done I'll not have an ounce of dignity left infront of my siblings or extended family.
        How should I respect or love a mother that causes me so much hurt, to the point of me wanting to kill myself?
        She has stood like a barrier whenever I've tried to do something of my hearts wish, she started storms in the house even when I was a kid or a teenager if I did not do a chore or if I wanted to cut my hair or if I even wanted to move around furniture and rearrange a room, if I put up a fight, I was a disobedient fat cow. 'Look at yourself, people will spit on you' words that will always stick with me till I die.
        I'm sorry you're going through something like that. I think you should make dua for your mother to change. She may not have empathy or compassion. I wouldn't be surprised if you are maybe gaining weight as result of the abuse due to maybe comfort eating or something.

        Btw I think you are trying to lose weight the wrong way. Starving yourself for days sounds really harmful. You need to stop that or you may do yourself some permanent damage. Look up online guides about how people do it and follow it step by step. It should be a gradual process which you can carry on doing even if after you lose weight. For example things like exercise on a daily basis just to keep healthy etc... Doing it for your mother isn't good motivation and what she is doing is just abuse. The goal should be to do it for yourself. Don't be too skinny or overweight, just get a weight at which you feel comfortable and which is also healthy. But remember your weight is not what makes you as a person, it's your dedication to Islam, your manners, being good natured etc... which represent you as a person. Keep those things in check and it's all good.