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giving a baby up

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  • giving a baby up

    I have a question that is quite uncomfortable for me to ask but as a Muslim this is the only forum I want to ask it.

    I understand it is considered a blessing to take care of an orphan. But I would like to know what the Islamic rule is on giving your baby to a family who have better means to take care of it. And I’m talking about a Muslim family of course.

  • #2
    If this decision involves you or someone you know, you should not feel uncomfortable to ask. In fact, you must ask, especially people of knowledge in your community (imams who are trustworthy, etc.) since it's a huge decision that will affect the life of the child forever.

    Even if we say that the Islamic ruling is that it's permissible in general, you have to take into consideration a few things:

    1. What is the reason (you or whoever else) wants to give the baby up to someone else?

    Depending on the answer, it could be permissible, or it could be very blameworthy to have a child grow up without his or her mother.

    2. Do you mean by "better means", as in financial? If so, then we must believe that Allah is the Provider and the baby will come with its provision. We must be patient and rely on Allah, and everything will fall into place.

    You can read this as it may have some benefit for you:
    ”Giving” a Child to Someone Else to Raise


    • #3
      Assalamu Alaikum.

      Obviously we do not know the ins and outs of your situation but what you must realise is that Allah has promised to take care of the child for he provides provision so most of the time when someone talks about giving up a child then it is more about the mental state that they are in at the present moment. Past issues which have not been resolved. Or just not having the will or motivation to raise a child or addictions to substances or a certain lifestyle that they are living in which raising a child becomes an "inconvenience". So if you would elaborate further then we can try and advise you better.

      Whatever the reason for giving up a child one will forever live in guilt and at some point would want to reignite a relationship with the grown up son or daughter by which time they will grow up feeling a low sense of self worth like they were not important enough or loved enough hence why they were given up for someone else. A Mother or a Father can never be replaced. So please do think very carefully about this and get referred to the relevant support services and therapy from a Muslim if you can as that way you will get the help and advice from a Muslims perspective.

      May Allah ease your affairs and make things easier for you. Ameen
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