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The Random Thoughts Megathread v3.0(daily chat)

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  • detached soul
    replied
    Originally posted by ThisIsJannah View Post
    I'm h been very lazy today! Its no good, I need to start become more active.
    Wake up early and go for a run in the cold. It will get your blood pumping and you'll feel better.

    Leave a comment:


  • ThisIsJannah
    replied
    to*

    Leave a comment:


  • ThisIsJannah
    replied
    I'm h been very lazy today! Its no good, I need to start become more active.

    Leave a comment:


  • detached soul
    replied
    Life is hard. I don't know if I can carry on sometimes

    Leave a comment:


  • MyUsernameIs...
    replied
    Originally posted by Magic. View Post
    My mum knows she needs to cover properly during salah, and I have even told her but she insists on wearing a very loose scarf draped around exposing her neck and it falls off and then she has to drag it. She doesn't want to wear the hijab. Any advice or do Pakistani women have a different way of covering.
    Our elder Pakistani women don't like tight fitting scarves that are worn today.
    She can just wear a large shawl/chadar and wrap it closer around her head

    Leave a comment:


  • MyUsernameIs...
    replied
    Originally posted by ten_toes View Post
    I had a white colleague remark on this once...about how little friendship women in my culture actually have (she works with a lot of families in a counselling kind of role)...just for them, when it isn't about cousins, relatives and in laws. I couldn't argue.
    So true.
    ​​
    A Bengali friend of mine got married into a very typically cultural family where the women have no friends beyond their cousins & in-laws

    Seems to lead to quite narrow minded women who have a very limited outlook on life, almost as though they live under a rock. No passion or interest in life other than their household.

    This is not to badmouth women who prioritise their household - thats how it should be and is commendable.
    But like everything in life there must be a balance.

    Leave a comment:


  • Magic.
    replied
    My mum knows she needs to cover properly during salah, and I have even told her but she insists on wearing a very loose scarf draped around exposing her neck and it falls off and then she has to drag it. She doesn't want to wear the hijab. Any advice or do Pakistani women have a different way of covering.

    Leave a comment:


  • usernametaken
    replied
    Just my opinions.

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  • usernametaken
    replied
    Yes they care, but it's mixed with politics and hasn't to be their way.
    the ones that don't care want to watch like it's some entertainment, see what x does I couldn't, I hate how everyone cares what other sports think, you should only take it on board to inform yourself about choices and learn, not to get stuck between and rock and a hard place.
    Unless you are someone's who cannot live without guidelines and copying/competition, then yeah, go ahead and follow the tradition and be happy.

    Leave a comment:


  • usernametaken
    replied
    These people actually limit your potential.

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  • usernametaken
    replied
    I hate how everything is made to be. If you don,5 marry asap then everyone can blame you for being u married themselves if you aren't older. Bs rules made up by the same people who complain. And how everyone want a say in your destiny. Maybe if they had to think outside the box it would threaten them because they didn't allow it for themselves. I know it's good to stick to tradition and what work and but calm down. Of course you will end up being right if you force extreme mental stress on others Constantly.
    Leave people alone, support them in their path and if they are happy, or peaceful and living their lives with some clarity, doors will open for them that are just right. Unless you don,t want that for them haha

    Leave a comment:


  • ten_toes
    replied
    I was thinkig about this recently as well. In real life amongst those I know or just even observing married people when I would be in their homes and be able to see their lives.....everything was so banal, so overwhelmingly same-same, something inside you hurts to see it. That's my eyes, from theirs it could be very different, perhaps comforting. At points in my life when I've had clear purpose, been busy, had great relationships with others I've found that I care not a jot if I never marry.

    I would also say I'd rather be single than unhappy except that for South Asian women (Indians less so) being single often means being nothing to anyone. You're stress to parents, and the setup is so that married south asian girls make their husband and children their whole lives inc in laws, nothing else matters...so where would a single lady come in? Even as a sibling or friend you are unimportant, you come last. There's no place for us in my culture, all these women only care about their husbands ...they don't do anything beyond that...this is why it's terribly lonely and women who would thrive without marriage just get desperate to join in if only not to be isolated anymore. I had a white colleague remark on this once...about how little friendship women in my culture actually have (she works with a lot of families in a counselling kind of role)...just for them, when it isn't about cousins, relatives and in laws. I couldn't argue.

    Leave a comment:


  • aelmo
    replied
    Originally posted by nudgetheputri1 View Post

    If it is worth it, I think people would work hard towards it, whatever it is.
    I don’t know. Based off what we have seen on here I don’t trust that trying your best to make it work will always be reciprocated by your spouse.

    If anything though, this place has taught me to be more critical and to think of marriage more practically rather then just something you have to do. I’m not opposed to it, but now I see that the person you marry and your compatibility with them is very important. I’m not going to accept someone just because I’m getting older or people are telling me I have to get married. The person is important and I am willing to wait until I find someone I can be good with.

    very cringe but you know what I mean.

    also you don’t need to reply. This is just my little marriage rant for the week.

    Leave a comment:


  • nudgetheputri1
    replied
    Thx for the well wishes

    Leave a comment:


  • nudgetheputri1
    replied
    Originally posted by aelmo View Post

    Honestly the marriage section has really put me off getting married. Its paints a very bleak picture of what marriage life is like. And honestly couples I see in real life don't seem to be doing good either. Marriage is hard work.

    I would rather be single forever then be trapped in such a miserable situation.

    Also, I hope you're feeling better
    If it is worth it, I think people would work hard towards it, whatever it is.

    Leave a comment:

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