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  • usernametaken
    started a topic Thinking about something...then it happens

    Thinking about something...then it happens

    Is it confirmation bias? I doubt it. There are times when im stressed and im over thinking and then i will process a thought/feeling and acknowledge it, then get over ot because it's not real, only for something to occur eg a few days later which requires the same level of emotional/mental thought.

  • Kaas
    replied
    Originally posted by aelmo View Post

    You really canít. Its difficult to come up with solutions when you have so many emotions leading you in a certain way.

    May allah help us be patient during our trials and may he help guide us out of them. Amen.
    Allahumma ameen

    Leave a comment:


  • aelmo
    replied
    Originally posted by Kaas View Post

    Aw yea i kinda feel the same way, because whatever caused this isnt supposed to have such power over me that it can rule my life the way it does... i think i understand how you feel, like whenever i get in a depressed mood for whatever reason, its only after i got out of it that i can think rationally again and then i try to figure out how to avoid getting depressed in the first place next time, but idk how, like whenever you feel bad, you just can't think rationally anymore?
    You really canít. Its difficult to come up with solutions when you have so many emotions leading you in a certain way.

    May allah help us be patient during our trials and may he help guide us out of them. Amen.

    Leave a comment:


  • Kaas
    replied
    Originally posted by aelmo View Post

    Your right p, it really can make you feel worse knowing whatís actually wrong. Cause you know but that doesnít solve anything. I was always occupied trying to figure out what was happening, and now that I know I feel worse because I donít know how to fix it.

    I can can easily forget about things so when things are going good I never think about those things that bugged me. And because of that when something bad happens i am in shock by it and it hurts a lot more. I found that recently any time something bad happens it takes me a little longer to forget about it and move on. All those years of repressing everything are catching up to me I feel. When something is bugging me, I donít know how to act like it isnít. Which sucks because I really donít like the person I become when I feel so depressed.
    Aw yea i kinda feel the same way, because whatever caused this isnt supposed to have such power over me that it can rule my life the way it does... i think i understand how you feel, like whenever i get in a depressed mood for whatever reason, its only after i got out of it that i can think rationally again and then i try to figure out how to avoid getting depressed in the first place next time, but idk how, like whenever you feel bad, you just can't think rationally anymore?

    Leave a comment:


  • aelmo
    replied
    Originally posted by Kaas View Post

    Yea you're right, but talking just doesnt do much, maybe i should have talked before everything came to this point, to solve the problems that caused this instead of trying to solve everything it caused, if that makes sense. But at this point i know the cause of my issues and i know my issues, but i dont have a way out from here. I always taught when you know the cause of something you can solve that and thats it, but i guess thats not true.

    yea sometimes we even have issues that we blurred out to protect ourselves so we dont even consider telling the therapist because we kind of forgot about them in a way.
    Your right p, it really can make you feel worse knowing whatís actually wrong. Cause you know but that doesnít solve anything. I was always occupied trying to figure out what was happening, and now that I know I feel worse because I donít know how to fix it.

    I can can easily forget about things so when things are going good I never think about those things that bugged me. And because of that when something bad happens i am in shock by it and it hurts a lot more. I found that recently any time something bad happens it takes me a little longer to forget about it and move on. All those years of repressing everything are catching up to me I feel. When something is bugging me, I donít know how to act like it isnít. Which sucks because I really donít like the person I become when I feel so depressed.

    Leave a comment:


  • Kaas
    replied
    Originally posted by aelmo View Post

    I felt awkward to. I didnít tell the therapist the most important thing about my situation. When he asked I lied because I thought that he thought that I was just being spoiled and that my problems were not that big. Over the years though I realized that they were big and I should have said something but I didnít. Donít think that your problems are irrational. If itís something that effects you negatively then no matter what it is, it isnít irrational. Its ok to be upset. I never wanted to overburden the people around me with my problems so I always held everything in which made everything so much worse. If something is bothering you then donít feel shy about it. Dont let it linger on your mind.
    Yea you're right, but talking just doesnt do much, maybe i should have talked before everything came to this point, to solve the problems that caused this instead of trying to solve everything it caused, if that makes sense. But at this point i know the cause of my issues and i know my issues, but i dont have a way out from here. I always taught when you know the cause of something you can solve that and thats it, but i guess thats not true.

    yea sometimes we even have issues that we blurred out to protect ourselves so we dont even consider telling the therapist because we kind of forgot about them in a way.

    Leave a comment:


  • aelmo
    replied
    Originally posted by usernametaken View Post

    I feel like i need to completely share my whole life (starting a certain year) to feel understood in regards to some thought cycles i have right now.

    i have friends (nearly wasnt the case at one point i was ready to give up on being friends in some 'painful' times lol but i didnt alhamdullilah). But i dont want to share my whole life ups and downs with them just like they dont with me/everyone else. Its just feels better like that. If that makes sense.
    I feel that way sometimes to about sharing everything but I donít know who I would trust enough to do that with.

    It does make sense. There are some doors that you donít want people to open. Even if you are close with them, it may ruin what you have if you do that.

    Leave a comment:


  • Zeila
    replied
    Assalamu alaikum sis,

    Forcing yourself to smile can work. If you look after yourself (despite not wanting to) eat healthy foods (sugar usually makes things worse), busy yourself in studying, deen, etc, you should feel better In shaa Allah. And if you're a creative literary type, write good happy things rather than melancholy poems/despairing extracts etc.

    Internet is often a bad influence too. Online detox works for a lot of people. E.g. youtube and its comments, so it's best to watch beneficial stuff and even then its not healthy to spend too long In front of a screen

    Waswaas is best treated through ignoring it. The more you pay attention, the stronger hold shaitan gets. And it's only downhill or staying stagnant from there

    Leave a comment:


  • aelmo
    replied
    Originally posted by Kaas View Post

    Yea me too i never wanted to take pills, because you become reliamt on them and they have side effects too.. my problem was when i was in therapy the last time i got into a good fase for a couple months and i felt like i didnt have any issues, like i get in a denial fase lol, and even if i have a bad episode i do feel akward about sharing it because its usually irrational
    I felt awkward to. I didnít tell the therapist the most important thing about my situation. When he asked I lied because I thought that he thought that I was just being spoiled and that my problems were not that big. Over the years though I realized that they were big and I should have said something but I didnít. Donít think that your problems are irrational. If itís something that effects you negatively then no matter what it is, it isnít irrational. Its ok to be upset. I never wanted to overburden the people around me with my problems so I always held everything in which made everything so much worse. If something is bothering you then donít feel shy about it. Dont let it linger on your mind.

    Leave a comment:


  • usernametaken
    replied
    Originally posted by aelmo View Post
    Some people canít handle therapy. I went once and maybe 5 minutes in I started to see that this person does not care about me at all. I donít like seeing people pretend like they are sympathetic when they are not. I couldnít be honest with that doctor.

    It it wasnít all bad though. Sometimes saying things out loud makes you understand you situation differently. I donít regret going but I wouldnít go again. I cant handle putting myself in such a vulnerable position.
    I feel like i need to completely share my whole life (starting a certain year) to feel understood in regards to some thought cycles i have right now.

    i have friends (nearly wasnt the case at one point i was ready to give up on being friends in some 'painful' times lol but i didnt alhamdullilah). But i dont want to share my whole life ups and downs with them just like they dont with me/everyone else. Its just feels better like that. If that makes sense.

    Leave a comment:


  • usernametaken
    replied
    I am told i need to go to the doctor because i dont eat (minimal amount). Its not a physical problem but maybe they'll give me some meds that make you hungry (although i am not 100 % convinced it would work because if your state of mind is strongly negative you can still resist.) I can survive on less sleep now even no sleep on an occasion and it will seem like i did actual fall asleep that day.

    Leave a comment:


  • Kaas
    replied
    Originally posted by aelmo View Post

    Idk what it is, but I think it does help a lot of people. I am not used to sharing the things that are bothering me with others, so talking about it really effects me. Maybe I would have gotten better at that with time but it seemed like to much to handle back then.

    I also didnt want want to be that type of person who had to rely on others and pills to make me feel better. What if I couldnít have those things any more? What would I do then?
    Yea me too i never wanted to take pills, because you become reliamt on them and they have side effects too.. my problem was when i was in therapy the last time i got into a good fase for a couple months and i felt like i didnt have any issues, like i get in a denial fase lol, and even if i have a bad episode i do feel akward about sharing it because its usually irrational

    Leave a comment:


  • aelmo
    replied
    Originally posted by Kaas View Post

    Sometimes i want to go back because i wanna resolve my issues but then it never really helped me though so yea youre right maybe it wont help everyone or you just need a good therapist idk
    Idk what it is, but I think it does help a lot of people. I am not used to sharing the things that are bothering me with others, so talking about it really effects me. Maybe I would have gotten better at that with time but it seemed like to much to handle back then.

    I also didnt want want to be that type of person who had to rely on others and pills to make me feel better. What if I couldnít have those things any more? What would I do then?

    Leave a comment:


  • Kaas
    replied
    Originally posted by aelmo View Post
    Some people canít handle therapy. I went once and maybe 5 minutes in I started to see that this person does not care about me at all. I donít like seeing people pretend like they are sympathetic when they are not. I couldnít be honest with that doctor.

    It it wasnít all bad though. Sometimes saying things out loud makes you understand you situation differently. I donít regret going but I wouldnít go again. I cant handle putting myself in such a vulnerable position.
    Sometimes i want to go back because i wanna resolve my issues but then it never really helped me though so yea youre right maybe it wont help everyone or you just need a good therapist idk

    Leave a comment:


  • aelmo
    replied
    Some people canít handle therapy. I went once and maybe 5 minutes in I started to see that this person does not care about me at all. I donít like seeing people pretend like they are sympathetic when they are not. I couldnít be honest with that doctor.

    It it wasnít all bad though. Sometimes saying things out loud makes you understand you situation differently. I donít regret going but I wouldnít go again. I cant handle putting myself in such a vulnerable position.

    Leave a comment:

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