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Contemplating Suicide

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    Contemplating Suicide

    How do I win this battle?
    Last edited by Bint Muaawiya; 10-05-18, 07:30 PM.

    #2
    I'm sorry to hear of your situation sister. I pray Allaah the Most Merciful, the Most Loving alleviates your distresses and makes things easy for you.

    It is tough raising a child with special needs. My son is Autistic and he's 6. So I can understand the frustration (to some extent, as no two Autistic children are ever the same).

    Can you distance yourself from your ex, so he has no impact/communication with you and you don't know what he gets up to? Divorce is always difficult - but going no contact and completely cutting yourself away from that person, always helps. This way it's a sort of "out of sight, out of mind" sort of thing.

    As for your habits which you've acquired due to your depression. It's so easy to get lost in simple actions which we think may numb the pain, but remember and you know this better than anyone sister - it's always temporary. Once you come to your senses then that hurt will resurface. So my advice would be - use a different coping mechanism. Get rid of the alcohol, drugs, everything that is haraam and find something else which will keep you stimulated and divert your attention. Can you do something like join the gym or maybe gardening? Or running?

    As for your son - he's four. Can you get any paediatric assistance? Any form of therapy? I'm not sure which country you're in, but in the UK you really have to bug the professionals to do something otherwise you're lost in the system.

    Make du'aa, and do not even contemplate suicide. When a person is contemplating suicide, they are thinking of short term relief. Not long term. You need to think of your Akhira, and you need to think of your little boy too. No one can give him a mother's love like you do.

    PM me if you want to talk privately In Sha Allaah.
    Last edited by Indefinable; 10-05-18, 07:40 PM.

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      #3
      Originally posted by Bint Muaawiya View Post
      How do I win this battle?
      Arm yourself with Taqwa. The way to achieve that is by leaving haraam and constantly being in remembrance of Allaah subhanahu wa ta'alaa.

      Ibn Al-Qayyim said, “The heart on its journey towards Allah the Exalted is like that of a bird. Love is its head, and fear and hope are its two wings. When the head is healthy, then the two wings will fly well. When the head is cut off, the bird will die. When either of two wings is damaged, the bird becomes vulnerable to every hunter and predator.”

      Source: Madarij As-Salikeen

      Soften your heart. Stop sinning and focus on being strong for the sake of your son. Don't despair.

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        #4
        what makes you want to commit suicide?

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          #5
          Along with the advice you're getting here, you should strongly consider proper Islamic counselling too.
          Allah is always watching [VIDEO]

          How To Weep For The Fear Of Allah

          Please remember to share these links with people you know so they can also benefit from them. :jkk:

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            #6
            Whats going on in your life that you think suicide is the option?

            I can only ever understand feeling suicidal if a family member you have loved more than anything in the world passes away but even then, many people go through with it and somehow manage to carry on with life.

            Other than that I've never understood the need for suicide.

            Depression - yeah I've had it too but there is always help out there for you, always exercise every option. Pray, take anti-depressants, talk to family or friends, take up a hobby, distract yourself, try meditating, go on holiday, get away from it all. Different things work for different folks, for me simply going for a walk everyday really helped me deal with my depression.

            Lost your job/can't get a job/no money - be patient and keep trying, you'll get it eventually. there are many jobs/options out there.

            Failed in life - so what? Failures happen to the best of us and are meant to happen.

            Being bullied - fight back, talk to someone, leave your school/work place or whatever environment the bullying is happening in, get the police involved, heck pay someone to beat the bullies up for you if you have to.

            In debt - ask people to help pay your debt, sell stuff, take a second job or if the absolute worst should happen - let it happen. You'll lose your house and all your possessions. So what? Its not a nice thing to happen and its embarrassing for a while but it happens to millions of people every day and eventually they find their feet again. Better to lose your house than lose your life.

            Embarrassment/shame - the typical Asian stuff basically, you did something wrong or embarrassing and people are mocking/shaming/disowning you for it - it does get better. Move away from the area/people and let the hype die down. Then start afresh or go back when they apologies.

            The absolute worst one of them all:
            I broke up with my spouse or best friend or the love of my life married someone else - seriously? what the hell is wrong with you? is your life worth so little that you are going to kill yourself over someone else? smdh get some perspective. I know its not a nice feeling but COME ON! you get over it, you move on with your life, you find another spouse or friend. No person is worth you taking your life.


            If none of this helps you, try this one method my psychologist did once. Simply imagine that the person you loved most in the world told you that they were feeling suicidal. How would you react/feel? And what would your advice be to them?

            Suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem and it doesn't affect the person it happens to but the people you leave behind. Your suffering will be over but theirs will never end until the day they pass away. Do you want that for your parents and siblings (and children if you have any)? Do you want them to possibly contemplate suicide themselves some day? Because statistics show that people are twice as likely to commit suicide if they lost a loved one to suicide. Life is a struggle but you just have to solider on just like all our beloved Prophets did. It'll all be over some day soon anyway...

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