Ads by Muslim Ad Network

Announcement

Collapse
No announcement yet.

In a society if both spouses have to work ....to survive.is hijrah compulsory

Collapse
X
  • Filter
  • Time
  • Show
Clear All
new posts

    #16
    Re: In a society if both spouses have to work ....to survive.is hijrah compulsory

    Originally posted by aynina View Post
    Wym?
    We will not be questioned on what made us feel guilty...
    But on the knowledge we had and how we practiced upon it.

    Comment


      #17
      Re: In a society if both spouses have to work ....to survive.is hijrah compulsory

      Originally posted by Ekoor View Post
      We will not be questioned on what made us feel guilty...
      But on the knowledge we had and how we practiced upon it.
      So you saying if i ended up in that situation i should ho out and find a job
      يَٰٓأَيُّهَا ٱلنَّاسُ ٱعْبُدُوا۟ رَبَّكُمُ ٱلَّذِى خَلَقَكُمْ وَٱلَّذِينَ مِن قَبْلِكُمْ لَعَلَّكُمْ تَتَّقُونَ

      O mankind, worship your Lord, who created you and those before you, that you may become righteous

      Surah Al Baqarah ayah 21

      Comment


        #18
        Re: In a society if both spouses have to work ....to survive.is hijrah compulsory

        Originally posted by Umm Fatimah View Post
        Only if he is doing 50% of the housework/cooking/childcare. The resentment problem creeps in when the woman is also working FT but the man kicks off his socks and shoes whilst the woman is running ragged at home trying to keep on top of these things. There is no way i would work FT, pay into the house and then come home to do everything myself.
        That's often a matter of personality or taste. I can remember years ago giving advice to couples where the woman made just your complaint. The men pointed out that they'd done just as much - or as little, if you prefer - housework when they'd lived on his own, so why should they bother now?

        Comment


          #19
          Re: In a society if both spouses have to work ....to survive.is hijrah compulsory

          Originally posted by aynina View Post
          So you saying if i ended up in that situation i should ho out and find a job
          Due to guilt NO
          Out of dire need YES

          Comment


            #20
            Re: In a society if both spouses have to work ....to survive.is hijrah compulsory

            Originally posted by Sceptic View Post
            That's often a matter of personality or taste. I can remember years ago giving advice to couples where the woman made just your complaint. The men pointed out that they'd done just as much - or as little, if you prefer - housework when they'd lived on his own, so why should they bother now?
            Well no it isn't down to taste or personality. I can't imagine many many who HAVE to work FT in order to survive revel in the thought of coming home and doing 100% of everything there too. Of course the man should bother, she is making up his shortfall so he should have the same decency!

            Comment


              #21
              Re: In a society if both spouses have to work ....to survive.is hijrah compulsory

              Hijra to where?

              There is no Caliphate or Islamic State to migrate to.

              Comment


                #22
                Re: In a society if both spouses have to work ....to survive.is hijrah compulsory

                Originally posted by Umm Fatimah View Post
                Well no it isn't down to taste or personality. I can't imagine many many who HAVE to work FT in order to survive revel in the thought of coming home and doing 100% of everything there too. Of course the man should bother, she is making up his shortfall so he should have the same decency!
                Well, no, not many men "who HAVE to work FT in order to survive revel in the thought of coming home and doing 100% of everything there too". They just didn't bother when they weren't married and they don't see why they - or their wives - should bother when they are married.

                Comment


                  #23
                  Re: In a society if both spouses have to work ....to survive.is hijrah compulsory

                  Originally posted by Sceptic View Post
                  Well, no, not many men "who HAVE to work FT in order to survive revel in the thought of coming home and doing 100% of everything there too". They just didn't bother when they weren't married and they don't see why they - or their wives - should bother when they are married.
                  So no one should do any housework or cooking? I suppose they could get a maid. Or just wait until social services knock on the door.

                  Comment


                    #24
                    Re: In a society if both spouses have to work ....to survive.is hijrah compulsory

                    Originally posted by Ekoor View Post
                    Due to guilt NO
                    Out of dire need YES
                    So guilt is a bad trait?
                    يَٰٓأَيُّهَا ٱلنَّاسُ ٱعْبُدُوا۟ رَبَّكُمُ ٱلَّذِى خَلَقَكُمْ وَٱلَّذِينَ مِن قَبْلِكُمْ لَعَلَّكُمْ تَتَّقُونَ

                    O mankind, worship your Lord, who created you and those before you, that you may become righteous

                    Surah Al Baqarah ayah 21

                    Comment


                      #25
                      Re: In a society if both spouses have to work ....to survive.is hijrah compulsory

                      Originally posted by aynina View Post
                      So guilt is a bad trait?
                      If it's not your duty to maintain your bro - YES...
                      Guilt over sins etc - NO...

                      Comment


                        #26
                        Re: In a society if both spouses have to work ....to survive.is hijrah compulsory

                        Originally posted by Ekoor View Post
                        If it's not your duty to maintain your bro - YES...
                        Guilt over sins etc - NO...
                        Okay its a bit hard for me to understand, so i shouldnt feel bad when we have low income like feel like its okay?

                        I wouldnt mind it at all tbh
                        يَٰٓأَيُّهَا ٱلنَّاسُ ٱعْبُدُوا۟ رَبَّكُمُ ٱلَّذِى خَلَقَكُمْ وَٱلَّذِينَ مِن قَبْلِكُمْ لَعَلَّكُمْ تَتَّقُونَ

                        O mankind, worship your Lord, who created you and those before you, that you may become righteous

                        Surah Al Baqarah ayah 21

                        Comment


                          #27
                          Re: In a society if both spouses have to work ....to survive.is hijrah compulsory

                          Originally posted by Umm Fatimah View Post
                          So no one should do any housework or cooking? I suppose they could get a maid. Or just wait until social services knock on the door.
                          Only the absolute minimum necessary - as I said, the question of just what was the absolute minimum necessary was usually the root of the problem. In fact, the men concerned were often very fond of - and good at - cooking. It was just cleaning up afterwards they weren't too good at. One pointed out that he cleaned all the cooking things he used - he had to before he could use them.

                          Comment


                            #28
                            Re: In a society if both spouses have to work ....to survive.is hijrah compulsory

                            Hijrah isn't compulsory especially since this is not for Islamic reason and there is no Islamic state butttttttttttttttttttttttttttt common sense says if you are struggling to survive in high cost area then move to a lower cost area assuming you can secure a job. The problem with lower cost area is that the jobs don't pay as much in lower cost area. So the same couple that moved to save money might notice they are not any better in low cost area because they are making less. Still do the calculation & see if its worth it. Make sure you secure a job for yourself before you move

                            Comment


                              #29
                              Re: In a society if both spouses have to work ....to survive.is hijrah compulsory

                              Originally posted by Stoic Believer View Post
                              I don't understand what is meant by "men not doing their jobs." If the couple is perfectly capable of living on the man's income, but he still makes his wife work, then yes I would say he's not doing his job. But if the guy is working super hard and his income is still not enough, and he needs his wife to work, I would certainly hope he is not resented for that.
                              Originally posted by Umm Fatimah View Post
                              Only if he is doing 50% of the housework/cooking/childcare. The resentment problem creeps in when the woman is also working FT but the man kicks off his socks and shoes whilst the woman is running ragged at home trying to keep on top of these things. There is no way i would work FT, pay into the house and then come home to do everything myself.
                              So the situation here leads to one way or the other ,woman getting to work and somehow becomes justified cos the man is finding it hard to manage.
                              Now the question is this is making a mockery of the typical muslim household ,everything becomes 50 /50 and whatever family problems or fitna that arises from it you just accept it cos,well you have already developed a what to do mindset..

                              Youtube channel - https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCYk...dE4pHzSid7Lr0w

                              **** Smiling won't cost you now is it ****

                              Zawjati ,“Uhibbuki mithla mâ antę” “Uhibbuki kaifamâ kunteee”“Wa mahmâ kâna mahma sâra”

                              Comment


                                #30
                                Re: In a society if both spouses have to work ....to survive.is hijrah compulsory

                                Originally posted by Ekoor View Post
                                Men cant control what they will earn, this was pre-determined.
                                What we can control in what we spend.
                                A smaller house/car etc will do just fine.

                                Contentment is key

                                There are exceptions though.
                                What if you are already in a society ,where it is generally understood woman has to work to makes ends meet..should we marry in a society like that ..ie western society

                                Youtube channel - https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCYk...dE4pHzSid7Lr0w

                                **** Smiling won't cost you now is it ****

                                Zawjati ,“Uhibbuki mithla mâ antę” “Uhibbuki kaifamâ kunteee”“Wa mahmâ kâna mahma sâra”

                                Comment

                                Working...
                                X