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How important are honeymoons?

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  • #31
    Originally posted by Magic. View Post
    So you guys feel so comfortable to get to know your wife even intimately at your parents. Super-cringe.
    depends how thin the walls are i guess.

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    • #32
      Originally posted by zi-zizou View Post

      Depends who is paying for the flights and hotel. If it's not me then I'm mad for it.
      One doesn't need to fly to fancy country for honeymoon. Honeymoon can be somewhere driving distance. Go to national park and spend time in nature. You can even go camping or glamping more appropriately cuz you want it bit fancy, but you save on flight and hotel cost. Its the time spent together that matters more than the flight & hotel. Not everything in life has to be OTT fancy

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      • #33
        Originally posted by Kya View Post

        One doesn't need to fly to fancy country for honeymoon. Honeymoon can be somewhere driving distance. Go to national park and spend time in nature. You can even go camping or glamping more appropriately cuz you want it bit fancy, but you save on flight and hotel cost. Its the time spent together that matters more than the flight & hotel. Not everything in life has to be OTT fancy
        But I want to feel special.

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        • #34
          Originally posted by Umm Hamasa View Post
          The most blessed marriage is the one with the least expenses
          actually in regards to the mahr
          it doesnt necessarily mean a pious women should ask for a really low mahr
          or a blessed marriage should have a low mahr

          if that was the case then all the prophets صلي الله عليه وسلام wives would have really low mahr but they didnt

          i think there are different interpretations to this hadith
          i recall one aalim saying in regards to this hadith and mahr


          its when for example someone gives mahr and the girl asks for less than what was gonna be given

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          • #35
            Originally posted by Abu julaybeeb View Post

            actually in regards to the mahr
            it doesnt necessarily mean a pious women should ask for a really low mahr
            or a blessed marriage should have a low mahr

            if that was the case then all the prophets صلي الله عليه وسلام wives would have really low mahr but they didnt

            i think there are different interpretations to this hadith
            i recall one aalim saying in regards to this hadith and mahr


            its when for example someone gives mahr and the girl asks for less than what was gonna be given
            .

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            • #36
              Originally posted by Umm Hamasa View Post
              .
              yes i know u didnt but i added the pious women because some people will think a pious women is someone who asks for very little where as someone who doesnt is not pious(not you but others)

              yes these hadith and statements by ulama are good and authentic ok but they say not to exaggerate
              what is affordable
              what is easiest

              im just trying to make it clear that this does not necessarily mean cheapest

              ie if a person who earns 20k a year wants to get married a women could ask for 2k mahr

              now if she asks him for 10k shes making it hard exaggerating not affordable

              if for example the person earns 100k and the woman asks for 10k for this man it might be affordable easy not an issue at all

              do you get where im coming from
              and i havent taken anything from other than quran or sunnah


              these ahadith show it can be interpreted in different ways


              p.s the mother of believers wived mahr was not cheap or low it was considered quite a good amount in that time

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              • #37
                Originally posted by Abu julaybeeb View Post

                yes i know u didnt but i added the pious women because some people will think a pious women is someone who asks for very little where as someone who doesnt is not pious(not you but others)

                yes these hadith and statements by ulama are good and authentic ok but they say not to exaggerate
                what is affordable
                what is easiest

                im just trying to make it clear that this does not necessarily mean cheapest

                ie if a person who earns 20k a year wants to get married a women could ask for 2k mahr

                now if she asks him for 10k shes making it hard exaggerating not affordable

                if for example the person earns 100k and the woman asks for 10k for this man it might be affordable easy not an issue at all

                do you get where im coming from
                and i havent taken anything from other than quran or sunnah


                these ahadith show it can be interpreted in different ways


                p.s the mother of believers wived mahr was not cheap or low it was considered quite a good amount in that time
                I agree with your statement that the amount of money a woman asks for her mahr does not neccessarily reflect how pious she is. I also agree that the mahr of the wives of Prophet Muhammad alaihi salatu wa salaam were not cheap or expensive, but reasonable for the time.

                My only point of disagreement is I believe the most blessed marriage is the one with the least expenses and the simplest. Even if you disagree with me there or interpret the hadith differently you will not be able to change my opinion because I will never disagree with the Messenger of Allah alaihi salatu wa salaam and that is what he stated in an authentic hadith with multiple chains of transmitters. The hadiths mentioned above show that even knowing a portion of the quran, a shield, or an iron ring can act as a mahr, because Islam is a religion of simplicity, not extravagance. But that does not mean if a woman asks for more than that she is a wicked woman nor does it mean that if she asks for less than that she is a righteous woman. Mahr like you stated is dependent upon the income of her husband and as long as it is reasonable and not excessive, there is no sin in that. :)



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                • #38
                  Want to go to honeymoon with my wife (married 5 years), can you advice something interesting ideas how to do it, thanks

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                  • #39
                    Honeymoons are stupid.

                    I can see the use in getting to know one another, but newly-weds will not have kids and if they are living with in-laws, then the husband is really at fault here. Hence, buy a house before you marry and that is alone time taken care of.

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                    • #40
                      Originally posted by Morose View Post

                      Honeymoons are stupid.

                      I can see the use in getting to know one another, but newly-weds will not have kids and if they are living with in-laws, then the husband is really at fault here. Hence, buy a house before you marry and that is alone time taken care of.
                      thats easier said then done and not possible for evergone in this day and age rent or buy
                      so the cheaper option is to stay with family

                      and please dont say dont get married till u can afford your own place

                      yes its the womens right but if 2 people are ok with the idea of living with family then thats up to them as long as they stick by the sharia

                      its better then not being married in terms of halal and haram

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                      • #41
                        Originally posted by Abu julaybeeb View Post

                        thats easier said then done and not possible for evergone in this day and age rent or buy
                        so the cheaper option is to stay with family

                        and please dont say dont get married till u can afford your own place

                        yes its the womens right but if 2 people are ok with the idea of living with family then thats up to them as long as they stick by the sharia

                        its better then not being married in terms of halal and haram
                        You can rent - I would not recommend buying.

                        Yes, if the wife agrees to live with family, but I am just saying that a lot of the marriage problems you hear of are due to in-laws. Personally, I would hate to live with family married and all.
                        Last edited by Morose; 25-02-19, 11:15 AM.

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                        • #42
                          its a holiday and you're with your spouse, whats not to like??

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                          • #43
                            Originally posted by zi-zizou View Post

                            But I want to feel special.
                            Lol,

                            جزاك الله خيرا
                            http://www.ilovepalestine.com/campai...imesinGaza.gif

                            "It does not befit the lion to answer the dogs."

                            – Imam al-Shafi’i (Rahimahullah)

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                            • #44
                              Originally posted by Palpay View Post
                              its a holiday and you're with your spouse, whats not to like??
                              The problem is not the fact that its a random holiday
                              ​​​​​​
                              The problem is Muslims copying the kuffar and going on honeymoons,
                              http://www.ilovepalestine.com/campai...imesinGaza.gif

                              "It does not befit the lion to answer the dogs."

                              – Imam al-Shafi’i (Rahimahullah)

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                              • #45
                                Why is it called a honeymoon?

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