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Women who backbite Warning: Rant

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  • #61
    Re: Women who backbite Warning: Rant

    Originally posted by Yasirah87 View Post
    Assalam alaykum.
    I have a side question: I know you're not suppose to talk about a person who is not there, but what if it is something positive?

    Rather than saying, "Fatima took off her hijab," is it okay to say, "Fatima gave birth to a boy"?
    If it's a statement of a fact, it wouldn't be wrong, of course not.

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    • #62
      Re: Women who backbite Warning: Rant

      Originally posted by Stoic Believer View Post
      If it's a statement of a fact, it wouldn't be wrong, of course not.
      I'm always nervous. I like to spread joy about things, so I'm worried it'd be backbiting because the person isn't there. I don't like to talk about people if they cannot be there to ensure what is said is right. Paranoid...
      لَمْ يَلِدْ وَلَمْ يُولَدْ
      سورة الإخلاص

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      • #63
        Re: Women who backbite Warning: Rant

        Originally posted by Yasirah87 View Post
        Assalam alaykum.
        I have a side question: I know you're not suppose to talk about a person who is not there, but what if it is something positive?

        Rather than saying, "Fatima took off her hijab," is it okay to say, "Fatima gave birth to a boy"?
        That's fine. It's only considered backbiting if that person you are talking about would find it hurtful.
        Don't depend too much on anyone in this world because even your own shadow leaves you when you are in the darkness

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        • #64
          Re: Women who backbite Warning: Rant

          Anyone who backbites someone especially if he/she is their friend/relative then they have hearts filled with ugliness. I believe backbiting and worse slandering really makes a person's humanity go down as its a sign that he/she has no respect to people and their honor. Yup a trait of a narcissist

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          • #65
            Re: Women who backbite Warning: Rant

            I can't stand people who spread lies about people but leave it to Allah. Karma never misses. Make lots of duas from their evil
            :lemo:

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            • #66
              Re: Women who backbite Warning: Rant

              Originally posted by Allah's_Servant View Post
              I wouldn't allow anyone to take care of my child but that's a different topic.

              From my personal experiences and from what Ali has said. I can tell this seems to be an Arab thing
              It's not an arab thing trust me, for some women this is their whole life and entertainment. They can't talk about anything else that doesn't involve another woman's marriage, someone's life, kids, husband etc.

              I avoid gatherings of older women, whenever they are around i hide knowing their whole conversation will be about so and so's wedding and so and so's kids.
              People don't do this anymore but i remember when i was a kid and there were big gatherings, they used to watch wedding videos, sit around with tea and backbite nearly everyone on tape for hours. And some of the stories i used to hear being spread around mostly about other people's marriages, so much detail lol, they're good story tellers i'll give them that.

              It's common with western/white people too, they are professional gossipers, they make money out of this stuff. obviously they are not muslim but still, it's a bad characteristic to have even as a non muslim. They know that.
              When it comes to men, they do it too but it seems to be based more around certain topics like religion, politics or sports or something and they don't get so personal. I've seen men openly slandering sheikhs with no evidence at all. Other will slander those of a different political view point and so on.
              every society has it's good and bad.
              شَكَوْتُ إلَى وَكِيعٍ سُوءَ حِفْظِي
              فَأرْشَدَنِي إلَى تَرْكِ المعَاصي
              وَأخْبَرَنِي بأَنَّ العِلْمَ نُورٌ
              ونورُ الله لا يهدى لعاصي

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              • #67
                Re: Women who backbite Warning: Rant

                Originally posted by Rumaysah~ View Post
                It's not an arab thing trust me, for some women this is their whole life and entertainment. They can't talk about anything else that doesn't involve another woman's marriage, someone's life, kids, husband etc.

                I avoid gatherings of older women, whenever they are around i hide knowing their whole conversation will be about so and so's wedding and so and so's kids.
                People don't do this anymore but i remember when i was a kid and there were big gatherings, they used to watch wedding videos, sit around with tea and backbite nearly everyone on tape for hours. And some of the stories i used to hear being spread around mostly about other people's marriages, so much detail lol, they're good story tellers i'll give them that.

                It's common with western/white people too, they are professional gossipers, they make money out of this stuff. obviously they are not muslim but still, it's a bad characteristic to have even as a non muslim. They know that.
                When it comes to men, they do it too but it seems to be based more around certain topics like religion, politics or sports or something and they don't get so personal. I've seen men openly slandering sheikhs with no evidence at all. Other will slander those of a different political view point and so on.
                every society has it's good and bad.
                Omg about the tape thing!!!! Yasssss!

                I watch those tapes once with my husband with was my mom and dads wedding and we're watching it because he wanted to see his mom (May Allah Grant her Jannah) I thought it was just fun. But put a bunch of old ladies and let them watch that tape! They won't just talk about what happened that day they'll you where those women on those tapes are now and how their kids are and if their divorced or not and a bunch of other gossip lol
                Don't depend too much on anyone in this world because even your own shadow leaves you when you are in the darkness

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