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Should I give up my nice ways?

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  • #16
    Re: Should I give up my nice ways?

    Originally posted by hadmatter View Post
    Tbh I like being nice those it's hard for me to be assertive it's not really in my nature, I feel guilty after I get mad lol:o
    Being assertive doesn't mean you're being rude or anything. It doesn't entail getting mad either. You wouldn't need to get mad if you set boundaries for what is acceptable to you. If you bottle up all the times people offend or treat you badly you'll just end up getting mad and looking crazy when you hit your breaking point later.

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    • #17
      Re: Should I give up my nice ways?

      Those people just want to see you become like them, so just be your self.

      Be Patient
      Account disabled.

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      • #18
        Re: Should I give up my nice ways?

        Originally posted by hadmatter View Post
        Sister, I don't think you understand what I said. I don't bend over backwards for anyone I'm talking about treating people with common human decency but no one seems to understand that language anymore. We are in the unfortunate world where you have get aggressive to get a point across. And if you worked with the people I worked with you'd understand. I just need to find the right balance is all.
        Like I said, stop caring what they think. Ever heard the phrase “You can please some of the people some of the time all of the people some of the time some of the people all of the time but you can never please all of the people all of the time.”? If they don't get it, then ignore them. Reject them and walk away. If thy are harassing you then turn them in. There's really no need to waste energy on changing your entire personality for their sake, they aren't worth it.

        The Prophets(as) were the best of people, and their peers still treated them badly. It never went away.If the best of people couldn't escape harassment, we sure can't.

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        • #19
          Re: Should I give up my nice ways?

          Our Prophet SAW used to be nice to even the worst of his enemies so those are the footsteps we need to follow
          Believe
          there is
          good in the world

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          • #20
            Re: Should I give up my nice ways?

            Be yourself, you can always win people over with kindness..

            Remember don't follow others... Set the trend yourself and lead the way...
            Raising money for Bangladesh in 2019 - www.justgiving.com/minhajul

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            • #21
              Re: Should I give up my nice ways?

              Sometimes I want to say screw it all and be a miserable you know what to people since others treat me the same way...

              But then I remind myself I don't want to be like other people. I like being nice and trustworthy and I don't want to bring people down and make them feel as awful as I feel

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              • #22
                Re: Should I give up my nice ways?

                assalamu alaikum wa rahmatullahi wa barakatuh

                Be nice but be firm. The Prophet (SAW) was well mannered even around those who got on his nerves. It's a test from Allah to see how long you will keep patience.
                [SIZE=4][COLOR="#FF0000"][FONT=Book Antiqua][CENTER][B][URL="http://www.ummah.com/forum/showthread.php?459504-Immensely-rewarding-dhikr!!!&highlight="]IMMENSELY REWARDING DHIKR!!![/URL][/B][/CENTER][/FONT][/COLOR][/SIZE]

                [FONT=Book Antiqua][SIZE=4][COLOR="#2F4F4F"][CENTER]Before you post, think..."Will this help me when I stand before Allah?" If it doesn't, then you're wasting time....[/CENTER][/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT]

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                • #23
                  Re: Should I give up my nice ways?

                  Be nice TC and just be happy! :D
                  Originally posted by Anomic Akhi View Post
                  Yes you should, there's only room for one nice person around here and that's me
                  Forge ahead!

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