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Does Marital Rape Exist?

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  • Does Marital Rape Exist?

    Salaam Alykum wrwb

    A brother asked a very interesting question last night and i thought i would share.

    'If a woman refuses her husband his right can he force himself upon her?'

  • #2

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    • #3
      Re: Can You Rape Your Own Wife?

      You can rape your wife but you will be answerable to Allah SWT on the Day of Judgement. Also I imagine by raping her you will destroy your relationship making her fear you and not be able to trust you.

      So to anyone who would ask such a question how could you even think that Islam could promote such things?
      Allah will ask on the Day of Judgment: “Where are those who loved each other for the sake of My glory? Today, on a day when there is no shade but Mine, I shall shade them with My shade.”(Muslim)

      "Zendagi Migzara..."

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      • #4
        Re: Can You Rape Your Own Wife?

        no he cant do that. if she keeps refusing for nothing n he goes to sleep annoyed the angels wil curse for that, right? if u even look at that hadith it wil show you, because you can understand in the wording that if she witheld his right in this then he wont get it, that shows that there is no forcing..
        even without that, if you just think to yourself, knowing morals and knowing the religion - do u think it wil b right to behave in such a way? obviously no, because rape is an opression. the relationship between husband & wife is supposed to be one of mercy, that works both ways. (she should not refuse his rights, and he should not force)
        for someone to ask that question it shows a misunderstanding about wat marriage should be like, and if he is not married then he dnt need to think about it & ask pointless questions.
        .: Rufaida :.
        .:Fa Firroo Ila-llaah:.
        http://s61.photobucket.com/albums/h6...th_Silence.jpg
        “People praise you for what they suppose is in you,
        but you must blame your soul for what you know is in you.”
        ~ Ibn Atallah

        Ramadan Activities for Children
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        • #5
          Re: Can You Rape Your Own Wife?

          Originally posted by NeverGoodEnough View Post
          You can rape your wife but you will be answerable to Allah SWT on the Day of Judgement.
          what
          you could do all sorts of haram thing & oppression & yeh u wil be answerable for it on qiyamah it doesnt mean we should say 'you can' :s
          .: Rufaida :.
          .:Fa Firroo Ila-llaah:.
          http://s61.photobucket.com/albums/h6...th_Silence.jpg
          “People praise you for what they suppose is in you,
          but you must blame your soul for what you know is in you.”
          ~ Ibn Atallah

          Ramadan Activities for Children
          <button id="tw_schedule_btn" class="tw-schedule-btn" style="padding: 4px 6px;position: absolute;left: 141px;top: 840px;background-color: #F7F7F7; background: linear-gradient(#FFF, #F0F0F0); border: 1px solid #CCC; color: #5F5F5F; cursor: pointer; font-weight: bold; text-shadow: 0 1px #FFF; white-space: nowrap;border-radius: 3px;font-size: 11px; display: none; z-index: 8675309">Schedule</button>

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          • #6
            Re: Can You Rape Your Own Wife?

            When someone is not in the "mood" or has good reason to refuse, it can be damaging physically and mental to perform such acts.

            Yes it is his right, but what about the hadith which says that the man who makes his wife happy will enter paradise (can't remember exact wording). So from this, if she refuses and he forces, will she be happy with him?

            If she refuses for no good reason, then I think it is a different matter, but even then, I doubt you can force.
            Tajweed lessons: RSS Feed

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            • #7
              Re: Can You Rape Your Own Wife?

              No, completely out of the question.
              The bottom statement is true
              The top statement is false

              Comment


              • #8
                Re: Can You Rape Your Own Wife?

                Originally posted by Kareem View Post
                No, completely out of the question.
                I think his question isn't a personal one - but a legal one - does marriage imply absolute consent at all times.

                I think in most legal systems it doesn't. Doesn't sound right to me either - why should marriage automatically mean consent.
                ...sermons from this minbar come with tongue planted quite firmly in cheek.


                "Let your boat of life be light, packed with only what you need -
                a homely home and simple pleasures, one or two friends,
                worth the name, someone to love and someone to love you,
                a cat, a dog, and a pipe or two, enough to eat and enough to wear,
                and a little more than enough to drink; for thirst is a dangerous thing."

                -- Jerome K. Jerome
                (Three Men in a Boat)

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                • #9
                  Re: Can You Rape Your Own Wife?

                  omg , no ... that is totally wrong. rape is rape who ever it is ! aouthubillah ! it is haram, so to say you 'can do it but u'll be answerable on day of judgement is silly, we ask if things are permissable or not becaue we do not want to displease allah for when we are asked on the day of judgement, subhanallah...why would a brother even think that way. if a wife is refusing her husband, he should maybe speak to her about it...think about it , if we were in the time of the prophet if this brother went to him and asked 'can i rape my wife' what do u think his reply would be. it seems very silly to ask such a thing , astaghfirallah.
                  Last edited by muslim_sis; 15-10-08, 11:07 AM.
                  Abu Huraira (ra) narrated that the messenger of Allah (saw) said 'Beware of suspicion, for suspicion is the worst of false tales; and do not look at the faults of others, and do not indulge in spying on one another..do not be jealous of one another and do not hate one another, O Allah's worshippers! Be brothers' (Sahih Bukhari)

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                  • #10
                    Re: Can You Rape Your Own Wife?

                    Yeah, a man couldn't justify in court that just because his wife consents 23 out of 24 hours a day (extreme example!) he can chose to bypass her consent that off-limit hour and get away with it.
                    The bottom statement is true
                    The top statement is false

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      Re: Can You Rape Your Own Wife?

                      Originally posted by .: Anna :. View Post
                      what
                      you could do all sorts of haram thing & oppression & yeh u wil be answerable for it on qiyamah it doesnt mean we should say 'you can' :s
                      You "can" and you "may" is not the same thing. As in I can drink alcohol if I want (who will stop me?) but I may not.

                      Let's not have an argument over nothing please.
                      Allah will ask on the Day of Judgment: “Where are those who loved each other for the sake of My glory? Today, on a day when there is no shade but Mine, I shall shade them with My shade.”(Muslim)

                      "Zendagi Migzara..."

                      Comment


                      • #12
                        Re: Can You Rape Your Own Wife?

                        Originally posted by abuislam View Post
                        Salaam Alykum wrwb

                        A brother asked a very interesting question last night and i thought i would share.

                        'If a woman refuses her husband his right can he force himself upon her?'
                        I'm perhaps alone in finding mysterious Abuislam's use of "very interesting" in the question above.

                        In the world of normal, healthy, educated, garden-variety Muslim and non-Muslim adults, husband and wife don't force each other to do anything, much less engage in undesired sexual intimacy.

                        Even to consider otherwise is to confess to a breathtaking unfamiliarity not only with human physiology and sexual response, but with the trust and empathy that form the essential basis for the kind of marriage clearly advocated by Islam since its inception.

                        Why, for cryin' out loud, is this question "very interesting"?

                        Consider, please, what Islam teaches about the routine conduct and adab of the Prophet (pbuh).

                        Given what you know, is it in any way possible for you to imagine that the Prophet (pbuh) would have at any time, for any reason whatsoever, ever imposed his desires upon, for example, Khadijah or Aisha?

                        Comment


                        • #13
                          Re: Can You Rape Your Own Wife?

                          Originally posted by NeverGoodEnough View Post
                          You "can" and you "may" is not the same thing. As in I can drink alcohol if I want (who will stop me?) but I may not.

                          Let's not have an argument over nothing please.
                          brother ur statement is wrong...if someone is asking islamically is it allowed for such and such , you dont answer saying 'u can do it but ull be questioned on judgement day' ... you answer on the basis of quran and hadith , what islam says about it.

                          If someone asks 'is it ok for me not to pray' , u dont answer saying 'u can miss ur prayers but ul have to answer on judgment day' , youd say something like 'it is compulsory for a mu'min to perform salah and the salah is what distinguishes the believer from the non believer' !!
                          Abu Huraira (ra) narrated that the messenger of Allah (saw) said 'Beware of suspicion, for suspicion is the worst of false tales; and do not look at the faults of others, and do not indulge in spying on one another..do not be jealous of one another and do not hate one another, O Allah's worshippers! Be brothers' (Sahih Bukhari)

                          Comment


                          • #14
                            Re: Can You Rape Your Own Wife?

                            Originally posted by abuislam View Post
                            Salaam Alykum wrwb

                            A brother asked a very interesting question last night and i thought i would share.

                            'If a woman refuses her husband his right can he force himself upon her?'
                            My understanding is that he can't . However if her refusal has no legitimate basis, and it angers her husband then she is answerable in the hearafter.

                            If it continues then most scholars say she should be divorced


                            http://www.islamic-sharia.org/marria...-rights-2.html
                            • Marriage in Islam is intended to protect the chastity of men and women alike, therefore it is the woman's duty to respond to her husband's requests for conjugal relations. She should not give silly excuses and try to avoid it.
                            • The prophet said "if a man calls his wife to his bed, let her respond, even if she is riding her camel (i-e very busy)." Reported by Al-Bazzar
                            • The prophet said "if a man calls his wife, then let her come, even if she is busy at the oven". Reported by Tirmidhi
                            • Narrated by Jaabir the prophet said "if anyone of you is attracted to a woman, let him to go his wife and have intercourse with her, for that will calm him down" reported by Muslim
                            • Narrated by Abdullah the prophet said, "there are three people whose prayers will not be accepted, neither their good works:
                            • A disobedient slave until he returns to his masters and puts his hand in theirs
                            • A woman whose husband is angry with her, until he is pleased with her again
                            • And the drunkard until he becomes sober" reported by Ibn Hibban
                            • The warning given to women whose husband is angry with her reaches such an extent that it would shake the conscience of every righteous wife who has faith in Allah and the last day. She is told that her prayer and good deeds will not be accepted, until her husband is pleased with her again.

                            Comment


                            • #15
                              Re: Can You Rape Your Own Wife?

                              Apart from the fact it seems to be wrong under Islam, in the UK it is illegal and the wife can report it to the police. The husband will be taken to court for rape. This has not always been the case in British law, it was introduced some years ago. I can't recall how long ago.

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