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£10,000 Mahr!?!?!?!?

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  • Re: £10,000 Mahr!?!?!?!?

    As recently as last year I was in Morocco, i heard of a 'wife market'.

    It sounds terrible but it was actually very practical, it was a government initiative, and it was to benefit the women.

    The said women were girls who had been brought up in state orphanages, they were 'miskeen'. They did not have a family network to assist them in finding a spouse in the regular traditional manner. The state acted as their family even up until the time of their wanting to get married.

    All women participants were willing and were comforted by the fact that the dowry was to go to them and that they had extra legal back up in the marriage by means of holding the potential spouses totally responsible for their action. Any abuse or maltreatment by the spouses was liable to them being brought up in front of a judge and dealt with! The state in my opinion was seeking a very practical and responsible solution to a problem they saw as their own.Unmarried women with no families of relatively low social standing.

    So far as I understood, the girls were more than happy to do it and it was often the men who were a little hesitant. Digging into their pockets methinks is a global problem.


    The 10G dowry for the prospective wife should not be shunned, it is her right to ask for that, and if the brother cant manage it then he must back off gracefully.
    Please Re-update your Signature

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    • Re: £10,000 Mahr!?!?!?!?

      Originally posted by AbdurRaheemG View Post
      As recently as last year I was in Morocco, i heard of a 'wife market'.

      It sounds terrible but it was actually very practical, it was a government initiative, and it was to benefit the women.

      The said women were girls who had been brought up in state orphanages, they were 'miskeen'. They did not have a family network to assist them in finding a spouse in the regular traditional manner. The state acted as their family even up until the time of their wanting to get married.

      All women participants were willing and were comforted by the fact that the dowry was to go to them and that they had extra legal back up in the marriage by means of holding the potential spouses totally responsible for their action. Any abuse or maltreatment by the spouses was liable to them being brought up in front of a judge and dealt with! The state in my opinion was seeking a very practical and responsible solution to a problem they saw as their own.Unmarried women with no families of relatively low social standing.

      So far as I understood, the girls were more than happy to do it and it was often the men who were a little hesitant. Digging into their pockets methinks is a global problem.


      The 10G dowry for the prospective wife should not be shunned, it is her right to ask for that, and if the brother cant manage it then he must back off gracefully.
      As opposed to making judgements about her and insulting.. :up:
      - Inna Ma'iya Rabbi Sayah Deen -

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      • Re: £10,000 Mahr!?!?!?!?

        Originally posted by ur_yusra View Post
        As opposed to making judgements about her and insulting.. :up:
        You got it and then pack his bag and make his way down to Morocco to said, 'wife market'. All with the grace and manners of a true muslim.
        If he still cant muster up the dowry then fasting is prescribed...
        Please Re-update your Signature

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        • Re: £10,000 Mahr!?!?!?!?

          Subhanallah, some words of sanity from a few people on this thread :up:

          Honestly, some of the other replies and views, just ridiculous.

          Id like to see some of the people here call a practising sister, a 'greedy gold digger' to her face, and see what response they get
          Last edited by Nawar; 08-08-06, 09:07 PM.

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          • Re: £10,000 Mahr!?!?!?!?

            PLEASE THIS IS GETTING SILLY NOW.

            Why turn every thread into a gender debate?

            Might have to ban certain usual suspects from these threads.
            "The objective behind Shari'ah is to liberate individuals from his desires in order to be a true Abd (slave) of Allah and that is the legitimate Maslaha... Violating the Shari'ah under the pretext of following Maqasid al-Shari'ah is like the one who cares about the spirit without the body and since the body without the spirit is useless therefore the spirit without the body is useless too." ~ Imam Shatibi - The greatest intellectual founder of Maqasid al-Shari'ah

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            • Re: £10,000 Mahr!?!?!?!?

              Originally posted by muslimah85 View Post
              yeh but normally the wife asks for it. Why not ask for a reasonable amount?


              will she check his bank statement before she marries him to see how much money he has and then base her mehr request upon that amount?

              what if he dosnt have it should he work a 80hr week for x amount of years to just pay her mehr off?

              get real, yeh a gift to get you started, something to fall back on etc, but asking a lot really cheapens a person
              "...but bestow on them (A suitable gift), the wealthy according to his means, and the poor according to his means;- A gift of a reasonable amount is due from those who wish to do the right thing. " Al-Baqara - 236

              Its a Gift, Not a Price - but, unlike the usual Gift its a Gift thats specified by the receiver...if the giver cant afford then the receiver cud (shud) decrease if they really like them..if not..not much else to do.

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              • Re: £10,000 Mahr!?!?!?!?

                Originally posted by Salman Al-Farsi View Post
                PLEASE THIS IS GETTING SILLY NOW.

                Why turn every thread into a gender debate?

                Might have to ban certain usual suspects from these threads.

                I agree.

                Definately.

                Ban them.

                Who are they btw??? I can suggest some names.

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                • Re: £10,000 Mahr!?!?!?!?

                  Originally posted by Nawar View Post
                  I agree.

                  Definately.

                  Ban them.

                  Who are they btw??? I can suggest some names.
                  Takes one to know one.

                  I just wanted to know who the mole is :up:
                  "The objective behind Shari'ah is to liberate individuals from his desires in order to be a true Abd (slave) of Allah and that is the legitimate Maslaha... Violating the Shari'ah under the pretext of following Maqasid al-Shari'ah is like the one who cares about the spirit without the body and since the body without the spirit is useless therefore the spirit without the body is useless too." ~ Imam Shatibi - The greatest intellectual founder of Maqasid al-Shari'ah

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                  • Re: £10,000 Mahr!?!?!?!?

                    Actually, hmm, what I REALLY meant was, that I can suggest the names of the people who are clearly NOT gender debaters. Thats obviously just me and Yusra as far as I am aware.

                    Feel free to ban anyone else. Jazakullah khayr :up:

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                    • Re: £10,000 Mahr!?!?!?!?

                      What still troubles me, even at page 6, is how can a man give up at one woman only because she ask for a certain amounth Could he change his deep feelings for her - must be profound feelings if he is able to spend the rest of life with her-only because an x amounth
                      :) t. l. poetry corner
                      So I stay in my chair, staring into the fire,
                      Thinking of where are you at this hour :scratch:

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                      • Re: £10,000 Mahr!?!?!?!?



                        Please...spare me!

                        What deep feelings? He's not supposed to have developed these deep feelings!
                        You are not aware of the consequences that would result (if you were granted what you desire) because what you seek might be to your detriment. (O soul) be conscious that your Master is more aware about your well-being than you are.

                        ~Ibn Al-Jawzee

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