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How do MUSLIMs get married

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  • How do MUSLIMs get married

    I was just thinking how is it that muslims can get married, as Allah has said to lower our gaze etc.....and two different genders are not allowed to communicate so how can marrige take place, as a man cant come and propose to a girl can he, cause he shouldn't even be trying to talk to a lady?


    What about love marriges are they allowed in Islam?


    I'm just curious lol even though i'm still young *YaY*:D and inshAllah have got many years ahead of me, buy hay there isnt no harm in asking is there

    J/K
    wasalaam
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  • #2
    Re: How do MUSLIMs get married

    Originally posted by muslimforever
    I was just thinking how is it that muslims can get married, as Allah has said to lower our gaze etc.....and two different genders are not allowed to communicate so how can marrige take place, as a man cant come and propose to a girl can he, cause he shouldn't even be trying to talk to a lady?


    What about love marriges are they allowed in Islam?


    I'm just curious lol even though i'm still young *YaY*:D and inshAllah have got many years ahead of me, buy hay there isnt no harm in asking is there

    J/K
    wasalaam
    No, no harm in askin'.

    Get your Wali to ask his family. If you're interested in a guy / gyal for marriage purposes you're entitled to look at them. You wouldn't wanna wake up to s/o unnatractive. This is also sunnah.
    Rabbana atinaa fidDunya hasanatan wa fil Akhirati hasanatan wa qinaa adhaban Naar

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    • #3
      Re: How do MUSLIMs get married

      Salam! Nice avi brother! :D

      Hm, i dont know, :) but i would like to read all answers to this question! Salam :)...
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      • #4
        Re: How do MUSLIMs get married

        Originally posted by muslimforever
        I was just thinking how is it that muslims can get married, as Allah has said to lower our gaze etc.....and two different genders are not allowed to communicate so how can marrige take place, as a man cant come and propose to a girl can he, cause he shouldn't even be trying to talk to a lady?


        What about love marriges are they allowed in Islam?


        I'm just curious lol even though i'm still young *YaY*:D and inshAllah have got many years ahead of me, buy hay there isnt no harm in asking is there

        J/K
        wasalaam
        send a message through one of your friends or email him, and propose him.
        ask him, if he agrees then ask for the hand from My (your lol) Wali.
        this is the proper way, since most of the girls cannot tell this to their Wali.
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        • #5
          Re: How do MUSLIMs get married

          salam alaykom...
          ok that's enough guys. i'm gonna have psychological complexe becoz of this topic in this forum.
          meeting with the opposite sex isn't haram in Islam. u've made it haram but it's not. there's planity of muslims who interact with the opposite gender in our islamic world. r they all going to hell? r they all committing sins??
          get over it plz n hlets see the reality coz no one asked us to be that much complexed. but we were asked not to commit sins such as zina or improper meetings with this opposite. so talking with opposite sex (even love and we saw in another thread what our prophet muhammad(pbuh) said about love) is allowed if it was respectful. otherwise, it would not be acceptable..
          peace...
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          • #6
            Re: How do MUSLIMs get married

            Originally posted by peace+love
            salam alaykom...
            ok that's enough guys. i'm gonna have psychological complexe becoz of this topic in this forum.
            meeting with the opposite sex isn't haram in Islam. u've made it haram but it's not. there's planity of muslims who interact with the opposite gender in our islamic world. r they all going to hell? r they all committing sins??
            get over it plz n hlets see the reality coz no one asked us to be that much complexed. but we were asked not to commit sins such as zina or improper meetings with this opposite. so talking with opposite sex (even love and we saw in another thread what our prophet muhammad(pbuh) said about love) is allowed if it was respectful. otherwise, it would not be acceptable..
            peace...
            free mixning is allowed only in certain circumstances like trade..islamic eduaction.. by this i mean men n women together in one place..
            but that does not mean its ok for a foreighn men and women to chit chat.. that is not allowed.. also to be in one room alone.. the hadeeth says if a man and a women are alone in one place.. there is a 3rd with them which is shaytan..

            so its not allowed to talk freely and openly with opposite sex.. specially on topics such as love..
            :asta: :hidban::(
            Good Quran recitation site
            THE REAL VICTIMS OF TERRORISM

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            • #7
              Re: How do MUSLIMs get married

              If you like someone try to keep it halaal... if u have an older brother or sister or bro/sis in law who can help you tell your parents or tell the boy / gir that is gr8... You would probably need to ask the guy/gal questions aswell to make sure ur compatible...n dont forget to have a wali with you aswell :p
              Oh Allah,
              Make me want that which is beneficial for me...
              And make beneficial for me that which I want.

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              • #8
                Re: How do MUSLIMs get married

                Tahts the thing its a catchy thing

                cud u make a decision on a girl/boy! by meeting her for a few hrs on one day

                or does one need like weeks to get to know their potential!

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                • #9
                  Re: How do MUSLIMs get married

                  Originally posted by Al-ghurabah
                  free mixning is allowed only in certain circumstances like trade..islamic eduaction.. by this i mean men n women together in one place..
                  but that does not mean its ok for a foreighn men and women to chit chat.. that is not allowed.. also to be in one room alone.. the hadeeth says if a man and a women are alone in one place.. there is a 3rd with them which is shaytan..

                  so its not allowed to talk freely and openly with opposite sex.. specially on topics such as love..
                  well that's exactly what i want to say. i don't find male n female being alone is allowed. i don't find flirting with the opposite sex allowed. but i cannot say it's forbidden to have social relation with opposite sex. i can't say u can't have a respectful friendship between male n female. our nation wasn't built alone by men or alone by woman. but in this forum the simple fact that talking to a guy or a gurl is haram. with my respect, peace..
                  Last edited by peace+love; 31-05-06, 04:44 PM.
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                  • #10
                    Re: How do MUSLIMs get married

                    Originally posted by Al-ghurabah
                    free mixning is allowed only in certain circumstances like trade..islamic eduaction.. by this i mean men n women together in one place..
                    but that does not mean its ok for a foreighn men and women to chit chat.. that is not allowed.. also to be in one room alone.. the hadeeth says if a man and a women are alone in one place.. there is a 3rd with them which is shaytan..
                    so its not allowed to talk freely and openly with opposite sex.. specially on topics such as love..
                    Salam alejkum!
                    This must be meant for the "unbelievers", am i right?
                    Last edited by Rayhana; 31-05-06, 05:38 PM.
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                    • #11
                      Re: How do MUSLIMs get married

                      Originally posted by sajid
                      Tahts the thing its a catchy thing

                      cud u make a decision on a girl/boy! by meeting her for a few hrs on one day

                      or does one need like weeks to get to know their potential!
                      good question..i wonder sometymz..lol.

                      the old fogies say..to meet a guy once is enuff..but id like to know him vaguely.. u know..to put my mind at rest..n that..
                      “The great Imam ash-Shafi’, he went to his teacher Waki`
                      Complaining about the weakness of his memory.
                      He told him, ‘abandon rebellion, for knowledge is a light
                      And the light of Allah is not bestowed upon a rebel.”

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                      • #12
                        Re: How do MUSLIMs get married

                        Salam again! I have a request and to this posting again:

                        "...the hadeeth says if a man and a women are alone in one place.. there is a 3rd with them which is shaytan..
                        so its not allowed to talk freely and openly with opposite sex.. specially on topics such as love.."


                        can somebody please find the ajah about Zakkaryah and Maryam, it tells about how when ever he visited her he always found some food at her... Please, if its not to much work, because this generelizing (or so...) it must stop... Thanks and jazzakAllah ul khayren!
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                        • #13
                          Re: How do MUSLIMs get married

                          There is a permit to get to know your proposed spouse before making a decision; Islam realises not everybody is compatible just because they are Muslims.

                          But there are certain ways by which one can get to know the person, going out to dinner for example is not allowed until after marriage.

                          Men and women are not allowed to mix with one another or speak to one another without a permit. Islam takes the notion 'prevention is better than cure' and cuts things ar the root.

                          For those that use their rations and say we can mix with the opposite gender as long as we don't flirt etc, they are living in a fairy tale world and must think again. Allah says shaytan works gradually, thus the zina builds up gradually, until you're left with a disaster in your hands. So if Allah says that we can easily go astray, who are we to say, 'nope I can handle it' ???

                          Unless we try to say we know better than Allah - will people go that far?
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                          • #14
                            Re: How do MUSLIMs get married

                            Originally posted by Ummati Al Islam
                            There is a permit to get to know your proposed spouse before making a decision; Islam realises not everybody is compatible just because they are Muslims.

                            But there are certain ways by which one can get to know the person, going out to dinner for example is not allowed until after marriage.

                            Men and women are not allowed to mix with one another or speak to one another without a permit. Islam takes the notion 'prevention is better than cure' and cuts things ar the root.

                            For those that use their rations and say we can mix with the opposite gender as long as we don't flirt etc, they are living in a fairy tale world and must think again. Allah says shaytan works gradually, thus the zina builds up gradually, until you're left with a disaster in your hands. So if Allah says that we can easily go astray, who are we to say, 'nope I can handle it' ???


                            Unless we try to say we know better than Allah - will people go that far?
                            Salam! Im sorry but i did't understand what u are talking about, and want to say! :) So, salam aleykum! :)
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                            • #15
                              Re: How do MUSLIMs get married

                              Originally posted by Rayhana
                              Salam! Im sorry but i did't understand what u are talking about, and want to say! :) So, salam aleykum! :)

                              Wa alaykum salam.

                              Well what would you like me to clarify, if anything?
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