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Are my expectations too high?

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  • #31
    Re: Are my expectations too high?

    Originally posted by Juwairiyyah View Post
    Why do you want to marry a white man specifically?
    Because I am attracted to white men and because I find men from my cultural - in general - to be more harsh (I don't know how I can best describe it, abrasive maybe?). I'm pretty sensitive.
    Last edited by Iwnbd1; 20-11-17, 05:13 PM.

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    • #32
      Re: Are my expectations too high?

      Originally posted by Tayoofa View Post
      I think your expectations are not high compared to the rest of Arabs but what about your family ? will they accept you marrying outside of your race ?
      I've had this conversation with my mother and she didn't oppose it. I don't know about my father, but he had a conversation with me about marriage for the first time in my life (last year), so I think that he would be very happy if I would just marry already.:onthego:

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      • #33
        Re: Are my expectations too high?

        Originally posted by Tayoofa View Post
        I assume you are from bilaad ash-shaam so don't request golden liraa and everything will be fine lool just kidding
        Never been there, I'm born and raised in Europe

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        • #34
          Re: Are my expectations too high?

          Originally posted by P1RAT3N View Post
          Nah your expectations are ok. Everyone likes something different. People around you will never understand your choices because they simply like something else. I hate candy for example and people refuse to understand that I detest it? Why, because everyone else likes candy. I am coming out as odd, which makes people refuse to accept my way lf thinking.

          Ok this is marriage and not candy, but you still make your choices. You are not racist for liking someone out of your race. We are one ummah, sharing one religion... Country does not matter. If people think you are racist then the problem is not on your choice.

          Then explain to me pls what a "white" man is? Arab people are white, and most african are black. So how come arab are not concidered white? I am confused :confused:
          Originally posted by myeverything View Post
          Aha ok although gold is from the past .. he gives mahr and she do with it what she likes buy gold or not ..


          Also, she said white .. he doesn't have to be revert I believe ...



          [MENTION=136964]Iwnbd1[/MENTION] by white u mean European or just white color as skin^^

          my uncle is a real copy of George Bush. We used to tease his children by saying that lol May Allah have mercy on him, dunno if that makes him white or not^^

          seriously what does white mean here... as skin color only or u mean certain race?
          What I mean by white man is someone who originates from a western country. At least this is my definition and what I'm attracted to.

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          • #35


            May Allah grant u a pious husband of your liking :)
            Last edited by myeverything; 06-12-17, 07:18 PM.
            How merciful Allah on me by giving me respite,and I persist in my sins and Allah shields me :crying2:

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            • #36
              ............
              Last edited by myeverything; 06-12-17, 07:19 PM.
              How merciful Allah on me by giving me respite,and I persist in my sins and Allah shields me :crying2:

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              • #37
                Re: Are my expectations too high?

                Originally posted by shay5 View Post
                Do you know any white boys? Would be difficult for them to find one for you if your area only has 100% arabs
                Nope.

                I don't really have a large network, I don't have any family besides my parents and siblings in Europe and the friends that I have can't find someone that meets my criteria.

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                • #38
                  Re: Are my expectations too high?

                  Originally posted by myeverything View Post
                  aha ok then u mean westerner .. Is Hispanic ok ? they're westerners but not white
                  I'm not attracted to Southern European (they look like arabs)

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                  • #39
                    Re: Are my expectations too high?

                    Originally posted by Iwnbd1 View Post
                    Nope.

                    I don't really have a large network, I don't have any family besides my parents and siblings in Europe and the friends that I have can't find someone that meets my criteria.
                    Reverts should be at the masjid...maybe get your brother to look for you...
                    Women lost their modesty when men lost their gheerah..” .

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                    • #40
                      ..............
                      Last edited by myeverything; 06-12-17, 07:19 PM.
                      How merciful Allah on me by giving me respite,and I persist in my sins and Allah shields me :crying2:

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                      • #41
                        Re: Are my expectations too high?

                        Originally posted by myeverything View Post
                        lol at the last bit .. ok

                        then u mean " Caucasian" . I'm just trying to help u out .. so people understand what u mean exactly.

                        say you want "Caucasian who originated from western country". Because we still have Arabs with Caucasian origin u know :abnormal:
                        I appreciate your help:jkk:
                        Arabs, Indians etc. could all fit under the category caucasian (depending on their facial structure)

                        I just mean someone who looks western european or scandinavian.

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                        • #42
                          Re: Are my expectations too high?

                          Originally posted by Juwairiyyah View Post
                          I think this line of thinking is problematic. I've seen other people mentioning it too.

                          Everything is qadr in this life. Why single out marriage as if it's in a special category? We still have choices and decisions to make. Can't just throw our hands up and say it's qadr, we can't do anything.

                          I've seen parents do this too, after they forced their kids into a marriage and they ended up miserable, then said it's "qadr" you can't blame us.
                          :jkk: The argument hat something is from the qadr is to be bought up after a matter has come to pass, rather than before. A lot of the time we leave something and say, it's Qadr of Allah, as though we are already aware of what He has decreed for us.
                          LAA ILAAHA ILLALLAH
                          -------------------------------
                          "And if you would count the graces of God, never could you be able to count them. Truly, God is Oft-Forgiving, Most Merciful." (Qur'aan 16:18)
                          NOTE: Please kindly do NOT rep my posts. (Jazaa'akumullah).

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                          • #43
                            Re: Are my expectations too high?

                            If you have the means to achieve what you aim for then, no, these are not too high.

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                            • #44
                              Re: Are my expectations too high?

                              Originally posted by Iwnbd1 View Post
                              What I mean by white man is someone who originates from a western country. At least this is my definition and what I'm attracted to.
                              Have you not heard brown is the new white...Pakistani brown to be precise.

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                              • #45
                                Re: Are my expectations too high?

                                Originally posted by zi-zizou View Post
                                Have you not heard brown is the new white...Pakistani brown to be precise.
                                Uncle Zizou coming in clutch for us Pakistanis, respect it

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