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I am a niqabi but husband is asking to cover eyes too

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  • Re: I am a niqabi but husband is asking to cover eyes too

    Discussion did take its course, all is said/ op got her answer/ .. discussion reach the top. Then, things start going down hill

    Thread closed [MENTION=25581].Hajar.[/MENTION]
    How merciful Allah on me by giving me respite,and I persist in my sins and Allah shields me


    • Re: I am a niqabi but husband is asking to cover eyes too

      Assalamu alaykum

      Originally posted by abdulsidd View Post
      This emphasis on obedience and rights is a horrible way to conduct married life, unless the wife has a really submissive personality. Most women (and men) do not have that personality.
      I do not necessarily believe that it is a matter of personality , but rather , it is predominately based on Imaan and Ilm.

      Originally posted by abdulsidd View Post
      The Shariah lays out the rights and obligations so that they can be referred to in court or in serious disputes, not for the day to day conduct of the marriage. I understand that we are talking about a dispute here (although a pretty minor one), but I am advising you on your attitude toward spousal relations in general.
      I disagree completely. The rights of parents , elderly , spouses , children , etc - were mentioned because they should be applied literally from a practical perspective. There is Hikmah in the teachings of Islaam. Implementing them leads to success in this life , and the lack of implementing them leads to our current state.

      Though I should mention , that I agree that no male nor female will be perfect in their practices , and we all have shortcomings. But these shortcomings should not lead us to positions which contradict our ideals. Rather , we should call to our way of life and morality , just like we do the Oneness of Allah.

      Originally posted by abdulsidd View Post
      In this case, the first thing a judge will look at will be why she has to wear niqab in her own home in the first place.
      An unfortunate reality. But to be fair , willfully accepting to live in such conditions is a choice that a woman ( and her wali ) make. Complaining after accepting something of such great importance in your life is nothing but a rash decision.


      • Re: I am a niqabi but husband is asking to cover eyes too

        Originally posted by AmantuBillahi View Post
        I don't believe that remark is to be taken in the most absolute literal manner. Not everyone follows the same fiqhi positions. For those sisters , wearing a one eye veil feels like 'half hijaab' - after she experienced covering completely. Im sure a sister who wears niqaab regularly , will feel uncovered wearing basic hijaab - and also does not believe that basic hijaab is the most proper way to cover.

        1) Do you believe that any classical Islamic scholars held the position that proper niqaab only allows for one eye to be visible?

        That blog is obviously pushing forward for covering both eyes , and they believe it to be the position of Ihsaan.

        "If women would stick to the one-eye Niqab, then we would say that this is the Niqab which was known at the time of the Sahabah and Tabi’een- but the Hadith says nothing of uncovering both eyes..........."

        "..........Moreover, the reason women were permitted to show one of their eyes was that, if they did not, they could not see the way (there were no mesh-niqabs or nets at that time). However, in our time, there is no need for a woman to uncover any of her eyes. In fact, women can cover their eyes with nets or clothes so as not to be a cause of attraction without having their vision restricted."

        Hmm , maybe I am not good at giving off my intentions. It is not my 'position/belief' that women who do not wear Niqaab are sinful , nor do I have any strong 'convictions' regarding the specifics of Niqaab. My purpose here was to free us from any denigration of Islamic morals and sound considerations.

        1) A major aspect of the rights of obedience given to the husbands over their wives , is that he should call her to khayr and modesty. A religious woman should willfully honour that by obeying him - and in truth , it is beneficial for the both of them.

        2) Wearing Niqaab is an acceptable position in Islaam - and without any doubt , it is better than wearing hijaab.

        a) It is possible that the husband follows the position which suggests that one eye , or both eyes , should be covered. He may think this is the position mentioned from the time of the Salaf , along with it pleasing his gheerah.

        Why wouldn't his wife be obliged to obey him?

        "His wife does not think that niqaab is obligatory; should he force her to wear it?"

        "The husband is enjoined to protect his family and warn them against haraam things. Hence he should strive to convince his wife to cover her face, and if she refuses he should force her to do so and she is required to obey him, because he is telling her to do something that is permissible in her view, and it has to do with his right to protect his honour and she does not think it is haraam."

        I know you may say that this is specifically talking about Niqaab , and not regarding the one eye - but I feel that my general points are relative. I am also aware that my language comes off somewhat inconsiderate in this thread , but I believe many people are going astray in these matters - and in fact , they often use words like "hardship , misogyny , backwards , oppression" - and it is through the use of these words , that the Shari'ah becomes obsolete.

        According to Shariah law , men are qawwam over women , and it is sinful to disobey your husband in halal matters. Calling your wife to noble things , which conforms to Islam and piety - should not be brushed off so easily as oppression. Following Islaam and striving for the highest is not easy. Fasting is not easy either , but if you want the benefits - then you must go through the pain and get used to it.

        Salaamu alaykum
        how does one force a grown woman to do something tho? they need to explain that. are they encouraging men to beat their wives into submission?
        O people who take pleasure in a life that will vanish, falling in love with a fading shadow is sheer stupidity~ Ibn Qayyim Al-Jawziyya


        • Re: I am a niqabi but husband is asking to cover eyes too

          Originally posted by *sheba* View Post
          how does one force a grown woman to do something tho? they need to explain that. are they encouraging men to beat their wives into submission?
          He's already correctly said the reference doesn't refer to the eyes-but niqab (that some do consider as fard). Sharia does not tell a men to force a Sunnah act onto his wife, but does say there is a reward for the sister if she fulfils his request to please him. (no sin only reward)

          The brother has placed too much power onto "obedience to the husband" and has seemingly ignored the fact/concern that some men do use that phrase as a way to oppress the rights and choices of women (there are limits to obedience and limits up to a point where requests would fall into oppression unintentionally or otherwise which we should all be aware of). His previous comment was that he would end up giving khula if his wife didn't comply but he doesn't fully understand the rulings of niqab for her.

          If this matter was taken to court do we really think for one second the court would order the wife to cover her eyes (do a Sunnah act) simply in the obedience of a man when it will bring undue hardship to her when Allah (SAW) has given her the choice to make on her own-and at is not illegal in the country they live? Or order it because of the sinful gaze of a non mahram at her? Most sisters who cover the eyes do so on their own personal preference or because the place they live oppress their rights to choose. (the fast analogy for hardship is mute as fasting is a fard act covering both eyes is Sunnah)

          We as a community can simply not over look these facts and should not fear speaking these words if we have genuine concern it could be occurring. Seeing or hearing someone being oppressed and turning a blind eye to the oppression makes us complicit in the act. Giving knowledge to fellow brothers and sisters about their rights is fard on us and gives them the power to choose whether they accept the situation they are in or not.. We should not assume everyone knows the rights nor allow them to remain ignorant to the rights.

          End of my contribution n this matter as the sister is now aware of rights and obligations and has made her decision mashaAllah.
          AsSalaamu alaykum


          • Re: I am a niqabi but husband is asking to cover eyes too

            I thought the husband could only use light beating if the wife did not pray or had indecent behavior.
            Am I right?


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