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Feeling broken inside (abit) Please help me !

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    #16
    Re: Feeling broken inside (abit) Please help me !

    The question now is

    How do you forget?

    How can u program your mind to forget?

    Comment


      #17
      Re: Feeling broken inside (abit) Please help me !

      Originally posted by Deen95 View Post
      Im sure this must be really hard for you brother, especially considering you spent 2 years talking to this person. My advice is the same as the brother before me said, move on.

      Best to just forget about her otherwise your just gonna go insane thinking about her and what she may or may not be doing. Perhaps next time you see a girl bring up marriage earlier rather than getting to know them over years.

      insha'Allah you will be alright.
      Brother thank u very much for the reply

      Comment


        #18
        Re: Feeling broken inside (abit) Please help me !

        Originally posted by muslim4life76 View Post
        The question now is

        How do you forget?

        How can u program your mind to forget?
        it depends on how much you are attached to her. If you rate your feelings to her from 1-10 (10 is highest) how much would u rate?

        Comment


          #19
          Re: Feeling broken inside (abit) Please help me !

          Originally posted by uccello verde View Post
          :wswrwb:
          What was your purpose meeting this girl twice, if not marry her? Where was her Wali? You can't go around meeting sisters, just for fun. In Islam it need to lead something permanent, or let her go.

          You have been 2 years talking to this sister and what has been holding you back not ask her to be your spouse?

          Today you feel hurt and next week, but you'll get over, Alhamdulillah. All this is just Dunyah, only thing which matter the most is your relationship with Allah SWT. Work on that one. Keep yourself busy with halal activities. Go to outside and run. Read Quran. Learn new things. Go halaqas. meet with brothers.

          Real love comes when you are married to person and live with her through trials and tests which life puts you two through and you still remain by each others side.


          When time is right you will find your spouse.
          And next time go on right way, meeting sister with her Wali.

          Just, move on and say Alhamdulillah.

          This is abit private why I met her twice

          I am not a person tht goes around to meet sisters I have never kissed a woman in my life.

          Iv never had a girlfriend in my life before this girl who i was speaking to . My intention was strictly marriage but what held me back was she was arab and I am British born Paakistani which I knew her parents would object to . Also, from the first 1 year she used to pray all her salahs later past maybe 6-10 months she lacking in her salahs e.g sometimes she missed all 5 sometimes 2 a day . I warned her about this if u do not pray u are not for me .

          I asked Allah last week show me a sign if she is right 1 and this happens do u think this is a sign?


          Today you feel hurt and next week, but you'll get over, Alhamdulillah. All this is just Dunyah, only thing which matter the most is your relationship with Allah SWT. Work on that one. Keep yourself busy with halal activities. Go to outside and run. Read Quran. Learn new things. Go halaqas. meet with brothers.

          Bro I appreciate it thanks yes Im trying to connect now with Allah . Just please do dua for me Allah finds me the right one I want (beautiful + religious)

          yes jzk for the advice I will meet with wali

          Comment


            #20
            Re: Feeling broken inside (abit) Please help me !

            Originally posted by Snippets View Post
            1- No I would suggest don’t wait for her message. Bcoz it’s not under your control, focus on things that you can do, rather than waiting for someone else.

            2- She is not related to you, so there is nothing for you to forgive. It’s her life, she has to answer for herself to Allah, and not to you. You are just another person on planet, for now.

            3- You are way overthinking, whatever she has done is not your concern.
            If at all you come to a stage when you propose her, only then you can ask her, and decide.

            TBH, what I think is that, she is in university. A whole new world or may be a lifestyle has opened up to her. She probably does not fancy a shy young man, who wants her to be religious and pray regularly and with whom she never marry. So she does not want to pursue this any further.

            You may have put her on a pedestal but that’s not how the world works.
            She was a girl who was brought up in a strict house. Not allowed phone cannot go out house. The day she went into university she had freedom. I warned her beforehand of the fitna in this university in the UK I did not want her to go but she went.

            So your right.

            Comment


              #21
              Re: Feeling broken inside (abit) Please help me !

              Originally posted by Stoic Believer View Post
              You are being pathetic. Get a grip man. You barely know this girl. "Broken inside" gimme a break. Stop getting attached to women over email.
              ahaha but iv met her aswell twice but the good thing is i did not fall in deep love with her if i did i would be really broken im just abit hurt inside. I kept my limits not to fall in love.

              Comment


                #22
                Originally posted by muslim4life76 View Post
                Originally posted by uccello verde View Post
                :wswrwb:
                What was your purpose meeting this girl twice, if not marry her? Where was her Wali? You can't go around meeting sisters, just for fun. In Islam it need to lead something permanent, or let her go.

                You have been 2 years talking to this sister and what has been holding you back not ask her to be your spouse?

                Today you feel hurt and next week, but you'll get over, Alhamdulillah. All this is just Dunyah, only thing which matter the most is your relationship with Allah SWT. Work on that one. Keep yourself busy with halal activities. Go to outside and run. Read Quran. Learn new things. Go halaqas. meet with brothers.

                Real love comes when you are married to person and live with her through trials and tests which life puts you two through and you still remain by each others side.


                When time is right you will find your spouse.
                And next time go on right way, meeting sister with her Wali.

                Just, move on and say Alhamdulillah.

                This is abit private why I met her twice

                I am not a person tht goes around to meet sisters I have never kissed a woman in my life.

                Iv never had a girlfriend in my life before this girl who i was speaking to . My intention was strictly marriage but what held me back was she was arab and I am British born Paakistani which I knew her parents would object to . Also, from the first 1 year she used to pray all her salahs later past maybe 6-10 months she lacking in her salahs e.g sometimes she missed all 5 sometimes 2 a day . I warned her about this if u do not pray u are not for me .

                I asked Allah last week show me a sign if she is right 1 and this happens do u think this is a sign?


                Today you feel hurt and next week, but you'll get over, Alhamdulillah. All this is just Dunyah, only thing which matter the most is your relationship with Allah SWT. Work on that one. Keep yourself busy with halal activities. Go to outside and run. Read Quran. Learn new things. Go halaqas. meet with brothers.

                Bro I appreciate it thanks yes Im trying to connect now with Allah . Just please do dua for me Allah finds me the right one I want (beautiful + religious)

                yes jzk for the advice I will meet with wali
                Lol. She was just praying to impress you.

                Move on.

                Comment


                  #23
                  Re: Feeling broken inside (abit) Please help me !

                  Originally posted by Ya'sin View Post
                  :salams:

                  I am very sorry that this has happened to you. Take this as a lesson :insha: you will be a much better man than this and next time you will be more cautious about how you handle it.

                  Again, sorry to say this but move on. Don't waste your time or your life sobbing away for this girl. It will take time to heal your heart but you have not lost anything worthy.

                  Speak to Allah, keep making dua because these feelings could turn you into a better believer.

                  Don't look back, keep moving forward because you were saved from a bigger heart break if she did not tell you now.

                  All the best.
                  Thank u very much akhi may ALLAH reward u ameen for helping me

                  Comment


                    #24
                    Re: Feeling broken inside (abit) Please help me !

                    Originally posted by muslim4life76 View Post
                    She was a girl who was brought up in a strict house. Not allowed phone cannot go out house. The day she went into university she had freedom. I warned her beforehand of the fitna in this university in the UK I did not want her to go but she went.

                    So your right.
                    Lol she dont sount like she was a religious girl sounds like she was forced to be like this and when she got the opportunity to let out she did eg university

                    Comment


                      #25
                      Re: Feeling broken inside (abit) Please help me !

                      Originally posted by Ya'sin View Post
                      What country are you from?

                      It seems as though universities have become zina hubs
                      Lol

                      Usually, non Muslims see it as fun, get drunk, go clubbing, meet people to hook up with. It's minor for them.

                      For us Muslims, well, I don't know what happened here because I didn't think uni life would be a 'threat' to someone's iman. Unfortunately it has become that.

                      University has become a fitna which is ridiculous because it's an educational institute, not a brothel lol

                      Shame really, I think Muslims that are serious about their religion struggle because it's a war between getting a degree and staying away from debauchery. Influence is there.
                      1.UK

                      2. Akhi universties in UK sooo many Muslim women lose their virginity it is shocking

                      All u see is muslim men n women mixing together


                      For me alhamdulilah university is not really a fitna because I hang about with practicing Muslim brothers thts y

                      Comment


                        #26
                        Re: Feeling broken inside (abit) Please help me !

                        Originally posted by Abu julaybeeb View Post
                        This girl sounds like she was never a good girl
                        She spoke to u for 2 years without a mehram and linked u twice she was not marriage material
                        What do u expect
                        Someone said a couple sweet words and could have persuaded her into anything
                        U dont just marry someone coz they are 'pure'
                        Marry someone who is a righteous muslima who will take care of you and help you reach jannah
                        Who fears Allah and will make your children into muwahideen

                        U wasted time for 2 years and commited haram
                        Repent and forget about her shes a waste of time
                        Seek into your religion and in time u can have a righteous wife who will actually respect you even when your not there

                        I think u are right

                        she had no fear of Allah but me myself I made a mistake

                        but Allah saved me frm doing anything when I was with her

                        U see women in UK alot have lost virginity had boyfriends etc its very hard to find a right woman here

                        plz do dua 4 me Allah helps me ameen

                        Comment


                          #27
                          Re: Feeling broken inside (abit) Please help me !

                          Originally posted by P1RAT3N View Post
                          it depends on how much you are attached to her. If you rate your feelings to her from 1-10 (10 is highest) how much would u rate?
                          5-7

                          I keep editing it I do not know sometimes its 5 sometimes 6 7

                          so between 5-7

                          Comment


                            #28
                            Re: Feeling broken inside (abit) Please help me !

                            Originally posted by muslim4life76 View Post
                            ahaha but iv met her aswell twice but the good thing is i did not fall in deep love with her if i did i would be really broken im just abit hurt inside. I kept my limits not to fall in love.
                            If you are not attached to her then it's easy to forget. I mean u saw her change and worst of all, stopped praying. That means she really did not follow Islam by heart. She was forced to it which means she did everything because "mom said" or "dad told me, that's why I did". These kind of people just followed Islam blindly and never understood the meaning of it. I think this gave you a good reason to turn around and leave her.

                            The second one of the five pillars of Islam is salat. She broke it.

                            Comment


                              #29
                              Re: Feeling broken inside (abit) Please help me !

                              Originally posted by muslim4life76 View Post
                              6-7
                              50-70/50... then maybe try to find someone that surpasses her? If you find someone better then you may be able to forget her completely.

                              U better find someone better. It's easier to switch someones place with another than erasing someone completely. I mean u want to marry. So the marriage thoughts will stay in your head which will make you think of her.
                              Last edited by P1RAT3N; 03-11-17, 09:50 PM.

                              Comment


                                #30
                                Re: Feeling broken inside (abit) Please help me !

                                Originally posted by muslim4life76 View Post
                                I think u are right

                                she had no fear of Allah but me myself I made a mistake

                                but Allah saved me frm doing anything when I was with her

                                U see women in UK alot have lost virginity had boyfriends etc its very hard to find a right woman here

                                plz do dua 4 me Allah helps me ameen
                                Say alhamdullilah Allah protected u from committing these sins and say alhamdullilah u never married this girl Allah is giving u the opportunity to find a righteous wife

                                And u dont have to tell me i know
                                But its not just girls after all its boys aswell they are even worse
                                Also just coz in the past someone had a relationship doesnt mean they are bad (if they have repented and change their lifestyle and charachter

                                Dont rely on anyone for duaa
                                Make duaa to Allah ur self in sujood in tahajjud salah

                                Comment

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