Ads by Muslim Ad Network

Announcement

Collapse
No announcement yet.

Do you think it's better for 2nd generation Western Muslims to marry Western Muslims?

Collapse
X
  • Filter
  • Time
  • Show
Clear All
new posts

  • Do you think it's better for 2nd generation Western Muslims to marry Western Muslims?

    Salam,

    Generally speaking, is it better for 2nd generation Western Muslims to marry other 2nd/3rd/4th etc. generation Western Muslims/reverts or would they be better off marrying someone from abroad from their parents' country instead?

    What is the general consensus among the global ummah community today?


    Thanks,
    Voltman

  • #2
    Re: Do you think it's better for 2nd generation Western Muslims to marry Western Musl

    Originally posted by Voltman View Post
    Salam,

    Generally speaking, is it better for 2nd generation Western Muslims to marry other 2nd/3rd/4th etc. generation Western Muslims/reverts or would they be better off marrying someone from abroad from their parents' country instead?

    What is the general consensus among the global ummah community today?


    Thanks,
    Voltman
    Wa alaykumus salaam,

    Generally the more areas that two people connect on in terms of compatibility the easier it is for them to marry and easier again to stay together as less things to fight over.

    The only good reason people tend to marry 'back home' is because they want to keep their cultural / language links alive in their family, unfortunately too often the family is thinking more of this, and more of what is compatible with the parents generation of the family than what is best for the person getting married.
    FOLLOW THE NEW BLOG - GINGERBEARDMAN - Muslim, father, husband, writer, defender of ginger rights!

    www.facebook.com/outreach4Islam - Outreach4Islam have been working together in Leicester, calling the not yet Muslims to Islam since 2006.

    Comment


    • #3
      Do you think it's better for 2nd generation Western Muslims to marry Western Muslims?

      It is obviously better to marry those closer to home and who grew up in a similar environment to you. For most of history people didn't even marry outside their town, let alone across the world.

      Comment


      • #4
        Re: Do you think it's better for 2nd generation Western Muslims to marry Western Musl

        Originally posted by Voltman View Post
        Salam,

        Generally speaking, is it better for 2nd generation Western Muslims to marry other 2nd/3rd/4th etc. generation Western Muslims/reverts or would they be better off marrying someone from abroad from their parents' country instead?

        What is the general consensus among the global ummah community today?


        Thanks,
        Voltman
        Wa alaykumussalam wa rahmatullahi wa barakaatuh

        Hmmm, it is better to marry from your own people born in your own country, and scholars have said this, and this is because there is a lot of unspoken cultural stuff and norms that will be understood and this will promote marital harmony. However, if you meet a woman from outside your origin who is a good muslimah, there is nothing wrong at all in marrying her.

        In my opinion, marrying from back home has benefits and it it has disadvantages. I am speaking from a guy's perspective btw. I personally think that someone from the west should try to marry someone from the west because there are so many cultural clashes in these back home marriages, which are usually pushed by the groom's family anyway. However, back home marriages definitley have advantages, like the girl is usually not a feminist liike many girls in the west and many are super religious over there.

        Personally I would prefer a Muslimah raised in the US or UK, but the best is to marry a salafi girl lol, because no matter where you go they will have have an aqeedah of placing the deen above everything, including culture, and that is the only kind of woman you should want.

        May Allah give you the best
        وَمَا قَدَرُوا اللَّهَ حَقَّ قَدْرِهِ وَالْأَرْضُ جَمِيعًا قَبْضَتُهُ يَوْمَ الْقِيَامَةِ وَالسَّمَاوَاتُ مَطْوِيَّاتٌ بِيَمِينِهِ ۚ سُبْحَانَهُ وَتَعَالَىٰ عَمَّا يُشْرِكُونَ
        They have not appraised Allah with true appraisal, while the earth entirely will be [within] His grip on the Day of Resurrection, and the heavens will be folded in His right hand. Exalted is He and high above what they associate with Him. (Az-Zumar: 67)

        Comment


        • #5
          Re: Do you think it's better for 2nd generation Western Muslims to marry Western Musl

          Originally posted by Abd al-Rahman View Post
          Wa alaykumussalam wa rahmatullahi wa barakaatuh

          Hmmm, it is better to marry from your own people born in your own country, and scholars have said this, and this is because there is a lot of unspoken cultural stuff and norms that will be understood and this will promote marital harmony. However, if you meet a woman from outside your origin who is a good muslimah, there is nothing wrong at all in marrying her.

          In my opinion, marrying from back home has benefits and it it has disadvantages. I am speaking from a guy's perspective btw. I personally think that someone from the west should try to marry someone from the west because there are so many cultural clashes in these back home marriages, which are usually pushed by the groom's family anyway. However, back home marriages definitley have advantages, like the girl is usually not a feminist liike many girls in the west and many are super religious over there.

          Personally I would prefer a Muslimah raised in the US or UK, but the best is to marry a salafi girl lol, because no matter where you go they will have have an aqeedah of placing the deen above everything, including culture, and that is the only kind of woman you should want.

          May Allah give you the best
          The bolded bit, I dunno they come across blunt and seem to have an attitude.not a generalization just my point.
          I worry whether it will be hard to deal with them after marriage.

          Youtube channel - https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCYk...dE4pHzSid7Lr0w

          **** Smiling won't cost you now is it ****

          Zawjati ,“Uhibbuki mithla mâ antę” “Uhibbuki kaifamâ kunteee”“Wa mahmâ kâna mahma sâra”

          Comment


          • #6
            Re: Do you think it's better for 2nd generation Western Muslims to marry Western Musl

            Originally posted by Voltman View Post
            Salam,

            Generally speaking, is it better for 2nd generation Western Muslims to marry other 2nd/3rd/4th etc. generation Western Muslims/reverts or would they be better off marrying someone from abroad from their parents' country instead?

            What is the general consensus among the global ummah community today?


            Thanks,
            Voltman
            Well sense of humour ,personality yes.

            Youtube channel - https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCYk...dE4pHzSid7Lr0w

            **** Smiling won't cost you now is it ****

            Zawjati ,“Uhibbuki mithla mâ antę” “Uhibbuki kaifamâ kunteee”“Wa mahmâ kâna mahma sâra”

            Comment


            • #7
              Re: Do you think it's better for 2nd generation Western Muslims to marry Western Musl

              Originally posted by Gingerbeardman View Post
              Wa alaykumus salaam,

              Generally the more areas that two people connect on in terms of compatibility the easier it is for them to marry and easier again to stay together as less things to fight over.

              The only good reason people tend to marry 'back home' is because they want to keep their cultural / language links alive in their family, unfortunately too often the family is thinking more of this, and more of what is compatible with the parents generation of the family than what is best for the person getting married.
              ^ :jkk:

              (Maybe not the only reason... but have to agree.)
              Last edited by Fakhri; 17-10-17, 07:25 AM.
              LAA ILAAHA ILLALLAH
              -------------------------------
              "And if you would count the graces of God, never could you be able to count them. Truly, God is Oft-Forgiving, Most Merciful." (Qur'aan 16:18)
              NOTE: Please kindly do NOT rep my posts. (Jazaa'akumullah).

              Comment


              • #8
                Re: Do you think it's better for 2nd generation Western Muslims to marry Western Musl

                Originally posted by Gingerbeardman View Post
                Wa alaykumus salaam,

                Generally the more areas that two people connect on in terms of compatibility the easier it is for them to marry and easier again to stay together as less things to fight over.

                The only good reason people tend to marry 'back home' is because they want to keep their cultural / language links alive in their family, unfortunately too often the family is thinking more of this, and more of what is compatible with the parents generation of the family than what is best for the person getting married.
                Originally posted by Stoic Believer View Post
                It is obviously better to marry those closer to home and who grew up in a similar environment to you. For most of history people didn't even marry outside their town, let alone across the world.
                Assalamu alaykum wa rahmatullahi wa baraktuhu

                I think you both raised good points. I have thought about this too and I think people who grew up in the same environment will understand how the things work in that certain place. For example, concepts like freedom, restrictiveness, social etiquettes, etc differ depending on the culture. I think its important to think about these. Allahu alam.

                Comment


                • #9
                  Re: Do you think it's better for 2nd generation Western Muslims to marry Western Musl

                  Originally posted by Climbing View Post
                  Assalamu alaykum wa rahmatullahi wa baraktuhu

                  I think you both raised good points. I have thought about this too and I think people who grew up in the same environment will understand how the things work in that certain place. For example, concepts like freedom, restrictiveness, social etiquettes, etc differ depending on the culture. I think its important to think about these. Allahu alam.
                  Yeah its important to be aware of differences. That being said at least for girls parents prefer established guys from their own western countries.. Part of it is the fact that guys are a bit less traditional and more established in their own community vs a guy who has to come over from another country. A girl can be married back home and brought over and given time to establish herself if needed. Generally for guys who don't have the best jobs in the west but still need to get married girls from back home are brought over so to speak. Me I have a mild preference for a locally born girl partly because I know they won't marry me for status or to get out of their home country. I feel like I'd just be very very picky if I went to my own country. My standards (at least for looks) would jump quite a bit as I know I'd have a slight advantage compared to local guys. That said I am very white washed(in terms of my interests) so compatibility would be an issue.

                  Comment

                  Working...
                  X