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marriage off limits

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  • #16
    Re: marriage off limits

    Originally posted by Somali_sister88 View Post
    Brother I am not estranged from my father lol. He has been in my life actively for the past 10 years but he worked abroad so we saw very little of him growing up- hence my mother raised us alone. But I have an amazing relationship with him and my older brother and would never think to approach someone myself.. I am far to shy to put myself out there. Alhamdulilah I know that my brothers would thoroughly research and protect me the best they can, my parents however just don't want to let go so my father just says no to everyone and the excuses range from education, to financial security, to distance.... the list goes on.

    That's good. And well done your father. What you call excuses are in fact right reasons to reject someone. If a man cannot provide security for the woman or if the distance is too great then there is no point. I like you father already for ensuring holos do not get a hand on his daughter. Right checks prevent a disaster of a marriage. Inshallah the right person comes in. Trust in Allah and remember if you want Allah to help you, do the things that Allah likes. It's sounds simple. But it is true.

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    • #17
      Re: marriage off limits

      Originally posted by Dinobot View Post
      That's good. And well done your father. What you call excuses are in fact right reasons to reject someone. If a man cannot provide security for the woman or if the distance is too great then there is no point. I like you father already for ensuring holos do not get a hand on his daughter. Right checks prevent a disaster of a marriage. Inshallah the right person comes in. Trust in Allah and remember if you want Allah to help you, do the things that Allah likes. It's sounds simple. But it is true.
      JazakAllah khaire for the advice.

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      • #18
        Re: marriage off limits

        Originally posted by Somali_sister88 View Post
        JazakAllah khaire for the advice.
        just out of interest what do you teach? primary or secondary?

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        • #19
          Re: marriage off limits

          Originally posted by Dinobot View Post
          just out of interest what do you teach? primary or secondary?
          Neither, I am a university lecturer. I teach psychology.

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          • #20
            Re: marriage off limits

            Originally posted by Somali_sister88 View Post
            Neither, I am a university lecturer. I teach psychology.
            how did you end up teaching psychology at uni? I presume ur degree was psychology right?

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            • #21
              Re: marriage off limits

              Originally posted by Dinobot View Post
              how did you end up teaching psychology at uni? I presume ur degree was psychology right?
              I have a PhD in Education Psychology and have been teaching for 3 years Alhamdulilah.

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              • #22
                Re: marriage off limits

                Originally posted by Somali_sister88 View Post
                I have a PhD in Education Psychology and have been teaching for 3 years Alhamdulilah.
                how was your first teaching class?

                I ask because I am about to join the profession and I am dreading the first class lol

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                • #23
                  Re: marriage off limits

                  Originally posted by Dinobot View Post
                  how was your first teaching class?

                  I ask because I am about to join the profession and I am dreading the first class lol
                  The first of anything is pretty nervewracking but students are students, if you teach 2 or if you teach 200 the same principles apply... make the work engaging, be creative and have cofidence in the knowledge you have and insha'Allah you'll be fine. It's all just a learning process.

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                  • #24
                    Re: marriage off limits

                    Originally posted by Somali_sister88 View Post
                    The first of anything is pretty nervewracking but students are students, if you teach 2 or if you teach 200 the same principles apply... make the work engaging, be creative and have cofidence in the knowledge you have and insha'Allah you'll be fine. It's all just a learning process.
                    Thanks for your advice

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                    • #25
                      Re: marriage off limits

                      You're welcome.

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                      • #26
                        Re: marriage off limits

                        Wa Alaykumussalam
                        Distance yourself from him, if you cannot.. you should quit your job
                        Don't give up on marriage sis.. why.. its on your mind..
                        And with Him are the keys of the Ghayb (all that is hidden), none knows them but He. And He knows whatever there is in the land and in the sea; not a leaf falls, but He knows it. There is not a grain in the darkness of the earth nor anything fresh or dry, but is written in a Clear Record”
                        [al-An’aam 6:59]

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