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  • RaNdOm
    replied
    Re: Why do you delay marriage ppl...

    Originally posted by zi-zizou View Post
    You did a course on this recently...you ain't dropping this rubbish.
    She's right in what she says though, you have denial, projection and other factors that will skew results. You need an interview by professionals to even conclude results.

    Also it doesn't mean I will automatically click with every intj, it's just I know what qualities I admire and I know they have them. That doesn't mean I will marry an intj, who knows.

    check these so cute :love:

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  • zi-zizou
    replied
    Re: Why do you delay marriage ppl...

    Originally posted by RaNdOm View Post
    Yep :)
    You did a course on this recently...you ain't dropping this rubbish.

    Leave a comment:


  • RaNdOm
    replied
    Re: Why do you delay marriage ppl...

    Originally posted by Rifqah View Post
    Sis, you're missing the point. Even if someone comes out a particular type in these tests, it means they're not that type. Even when people answer honestly to the best of their ability, you still have denial, projection etc. An array of mechanisms that prevent an individual from even coming close to an accurate self assessment of their personality.

    I wouldn't rely even in part on these kinds of online gimmicks.
    Yep :)

    Leave a comment:


  • Rifqah
    replied
    Re: Why do you delay marriage ppl...

    Originally posted by RaNdOm View Post
    You misunderstand the personality tests. There is no good or bad personality. Not AT ALL. It's just different. You hear my biased thoughts on it all because an intj would seem perfect for me. For others, they would regard that type as cold, unloving, unaffectionate. All of that. So there is no right or wrong.

    It would be pretty stupid if someone based their whole decision on a personality test. Just like it would be stupid for someone to answer the answers to the test in any way other than who they truly are.

    All it highlights is how someone processes their thoughts. So the same way people see me as self absorbed, it's because internally I need to make sure my feelings are in align with my beliefs so I will sound like memememe. Just like someone that is say estj, will come across as controlling and harsh. This is not so much them as it is the way they process information. They can be kind VERY kind but they will seem harsh because feelings are on the lower end of the spectrum for them and they like to find solutions to challenges.

    Any type can be aggressive and any type can be angry - it just indicates natural preference

    You would have to be pretty spastic to use that as your only indicator cos just check the results on the poll and people in the same sub category are completely different
    Sis, you're missing the point. Even if someone comes out a particular type in these tests, it means they're not that type. Even when people answer honestly to the best of their ability, you still have denial, projection etc. An array of mechanisms that prevent an individual from even coming close to an accurate self assessment of their personality.

    I wouldn't rely even in part on these kinds of online gimmicks.

    Leave a comment:


  • RaNdOm
    replied
    Re: Why do you delay marriage ppl...

    Originally posted by ninety1daisies View Post
    Finding marriage compatibility through personality tests.. This is the first I've heard if this lols. Regardless of the accuracy level of the tests, I can't disregard the idea of people lying on the test and seeking out specific "personalities" For example some angry, aggressive, selfish personality fakes their test to appear gentle, caring, and giving to match w someone of that similar nature. Sounds risky in that sense.


    And :wswrwb: (:
    You misunderstand the personality tests. There is no good or bad personality. Not AT ALL. It's just different. You hear my biased thoughts on it all because an intj would seem perfect for me. For others, they would regard that type as cold, unloving, unaffectionate. All of that. So there is no right or wrong.

    It would be pretty stupid if someone based their whole decision on a personality test. Just like it would be stupid for someone to answer the answers to the test in any way other than who they truly are.

    All it highlights is how someone processes their thoughts. So the same way people see me as self absorbed, it's because internally I need to make sure my feelings are in align with my beliefs so I will sound like memememe. Just like someone that is say estj, will come across as controlling and harsh. This is not so much them as it is the way they process information. They can be kind VERY kind but they will seem harsh because feelings are on the lower end of the spectrum for them and they like to find solutions to challenges.

    Any type can be aggressive and any type can be angry - it just indicates natural preference

    You would have to be pretty spastic to use that as your only indicator cos just check the results on the poll and people in the same sub category are completely different

    Leave a comment:


  • RaNdOm
    replied
    Re: Why do you delay marriage ppl...

    Allahumma baarik

    You sound like the type of stable person that a girl would need anyway

    But what made you invest 18months in her and at what point did you do istikhaara and was there an initial yeh this feels right?

    Leave a comment:


  • ninety1daisies
    replied
    Re: Why do you delay marriage ppl...

    Originally posted by Rifqah View Post
    :salams

    You can't rely on these personality assessment quizzes, they're just a bit of fun, not accurate at all.
    Finding marriage compatibility through personality tests.. This is the first I've heard if this lols. Regardless of the accuracy level of the tests, I can't disregard the idea of people lying on the test and seeking out specific "personalities" For example some angry, aggressive, selfish personality fakes their test to appear gentle, caring, and giving to match w someone of that similar nature. Sounds risky in that sense.


    And :wswrwb: (:

    Leave a comment:


  • Daddel90
    replied
    Re: Why do you delay marriage ppl...

    Originally posted by Dinobot View Post
    Mahr is the right of a woman. Yes some woman ask a lot but in the end, there is a reason why even Umar ra could not impose limits on it.

    Financial security is quite important to any woman. One of the ways a woman checks your financial stability is through mahr. If you can't afford a decent mahr then your financial stability comes into light. And no woman wants to worry whether the man she is about to marry can afford to look after her
    Financial stability is understandable, but within reasonable limits. Does financial stability mean driving fancy cars and live in a mansion? What is a decent mahr? And the materialism of Muslims today sickens me when there are Brothers and Sisters all over the world in need of help, how can you With conscience live a pampered life and do sensless spending? Weddings should be a simple ceremony, not a circus show some turn it into be. The couple in Turkey that chose to serve hungry refugees on their wedding day are good example of Muslim couple with healthy values:

    http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/worl...-refugees.html

    I don't oppose a woman wanting a husband with financial stability, but how the money are to be spent and values.

    Leave a comment:


  • Comrox
    replied
    Re: Why do you delay marriage ppl...

    Originally posted by Sister A View Post
    A lot of people don't actually mature until they reach their mid twenties.
    The brain does not even fully develop (such as decision making, judgment, etc.) until 25, so that says a lot in of itself.

    Originally posted by Sister A View Post
    And a lot of people don't actually know what they want when they are young.
    I would say that's largely a product of our modern society. As life gets more complex, as life throws more expectations at us (going to college, being well secured in a career, getting a masters even, owning a house, etc., before marrying), and as healthy life expectancy increases, people take longer to grow up. We have a lot of stages of being a child and adult now. We have expectations of teens and young adults just being ridiculous and immature like children. Teenagers are thrown into college expected to know what they want to do for the rest of their life professionally. They change their mind. They cannot also be expected to know the answer to this question personally. Not in this age.
    Last edited by Comrox; 04-03-17, 04:00 AM.

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  • Stoic Believer
    replied
    Originally posted by Dinobot View Post
    Originally posted by RaNdOm View Post
    How?
    10 years?? Wow.

    Leave a comment:


  • ninety1daisies
    replied
    Re: Why do you delay marriage ppl...

    ^mashAllah.

    May Allah bless your marriage.

    Leave a comment:


  • Dinobot
    replied
    Re: Why do you delay marriage ppl...

    Originally posted by RaNdOm View Post
    How?
    Last edited by Dinobot; 04-03-17, 01:49 AM.

    Leave a comment:


  • shezad
    replied
    Re: Why do you delay marriage ppl...

    Everybody has their own reason I guess bro.

    I didn't want to get married, I did try looking but nothing happened. I took a step back and found that I was happier living the single life, I felt no pressure and at ease with the whole situation.

    So now I've decided to give it another go, I don't feel 100% ready but if I'm not ready now then who knows when I will be....I can't risk leaving it until I'm in my mid 40's, 50's or 60's.

    People need to get tough with themselves and stop being so scared of this issue. Me included.

    It's easier to blame one another (the opposite sex) but the blame lays at our own feet. We're delaying marriage, nobody else. Plenty of good men and women out there. It's just that they don't all look like Kim K or Channing Tatum.

    Leave a comment:


  • Eorlingas
    replied
    Re: Why do you delay marriage ppl...

    Originally posted by n0.n4m3 View Post
    That applies to many parts of the world. Here in KSA, Cab drivers earn peanuts. And plumbers, salesmen, builders, chefs, bus drivers and others. The gap is huge between them and graduates. State Unis here are free.
    Its different in the UK, one can earn very well in those jobs. .

    Leave a comment:


  • Eorlingas
    replied
    Re: Why do you delay marriage ppl...

    Originally posted by RaNdOm View Post
    No but what do you think of that?

    At first I was annoyed but then I felt relieved at least he didn't get involved in any haraam behaviour...
    Hmm only Allah knows his intentions and if they were less than honourable he will be duly recompensed in this life or the next.

    Leave a comment:

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