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Temper problems in potential spouse

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  • Temper problems in potential spouse

    :salams:

    How can you find out whether a potential has a short temper/anger problems? I imagine this is something they will not admit and keep well hidden. Would friends and family be reluctant to disclose this information?

  • #2
    Temper problems in potential spouse

    وعليكم السلام و رحمة الله و بركاته

    Say something controversial/something that might push their buttons and see how they react if they get offended and angry then you know they're not the one.
    إقراء القران فإنه يأتي يوم القيامة شفيعا لأصحابه

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    • #3
      Re: Temper problems in potential spouse

      :wswrwb:

      just ask, not sure why someone wouldnt admit if they had bad/short temper

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      • #4
        Re: Temper problems in potential spouse

        Originally posted by iRepIslam View Post
        وعليكم السلام و رحمة الله و بركاته

        Say something controversial/something that might push their buttons and see how they react if they get offended and angry then you know they're not the one.
        How would you know what pushes their buttons?

        Originally posted by Simply_Logical View Post
        :wswrwb:

        just ask, not sure why someone wouldnt admit if they had bad/short temper
        Because they want to present themselves in the best possible light.

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        • #5
          Temper problems in potential spouse

          We have to do some thinking here.......
          إقراء القران فإنه يأتي يوم القيامة شفيعا لأصحابه

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          • #6
            Re: Temper problems in potential spouse

            Originally posted by iRepIslam View Post
            وعليكم السلام و رحمة الله و بركاته

            Say something controversial/something that might push their buttons and see how they react if they get offended and angry then you know they're not the one.
            Lol what?

            If you say something way outta line, to instigate a reaction then your just as guilty,
            http://www.ilovepalestine.com/campai...imesinGaza.gif

            "It does not befit the lion to answer the dogs."

            – Imam al-Shafi’i (Rahimahullah)

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            • #7
              Temper problems in potential spouse

              Not something way way outta line..... something different.
              I don't know, bad idea maybe.

              Make dua in Sha Allah
              إقراء القران فإنه يأتي يوم القيامة شفيعا لأصحابه

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              • #8
                For a spouse with good akhlaaq and Adaab
                إقراء القران فإنه يأتي يوم القيامة شفيعا لأصحابه

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                • #9
                  Re: Temper problems in potential spouse

                  Originally posted by Stoic Believer View Post
                  How would you know what pushes their buttons?



                  Because they want to present themselves in the best possible light.
                  well not sure how you would be able to tell, unless you try to cheese them off to get a reaction lol

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                  • #10
                    Re: Temper problems in potential spouse

                    the only thing you can do is ask the people they live with. don't be like "oh does she have anger issues?".....do it more covertly. Also, if you try to make someone made by trying to instigating it and then they get angry or whatever, it doesnt mean they got anger issues, their just human. Samething if you try to make someone laugh and they laugh....

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                    • #11
                      Originally posted by snowtrees View Post
                      the only thing you can do is ask the people they live with. don't be like "oh does she have anger issues?".....do it more covertly. Also, if you try to make someone made by trying to instigating it and then they get angry or whatever, it doesnt mean they got anger issues, their just human. Samething if you try to make someone laugh and they laugh....
                      What would be a covert way to ask, in your opinion?

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                      • #12
                        Re: Temper problems in potential spouse

                        This is tricky one, if you ask close family. They may cover it, that 'poor guy/gal' get nikkah. And meeting, s/he will in his/her best behavior.
                        Maybe people who know him/her, worked/studied have same inside. Some nations are known for their temper more than others....
                        If, I find out he has bad temper, I'll be running opposite direction.

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                        • #13
                          Temper problems in potential spouse

                          Give them a computer with a slow internet or a slow computer and see how they act
                          “Have you seen he who has taken as his god his [own] desire, and Allah has sent him astray due to knowledge and has set a seal upon his hearing and his heart and put over his vision a veil? So who will guide him after Allah ? Then will you not be reminded? And they say, “There is not but our worldly life; we die and live, and nothing destroys us except time.” And they have of that no knowledge; they are only assuming.” Quran 45:23-24

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                          • #14
                            Re: Temper problems in potential spouse

                            Originally posted by Stoic Believer View Post
                            What would be a covert way to ask, in your opinion?
                            Be like
                            "Yo on a scale of 1-10 how bad of a temper do you have"

                            She " ugh *scratches head 8"

                            That means she has anger problems .

                            If she responds with "ugh 5 I guess"

                            It means she's angered normally

                            If she says " idk I don't get angered easily"

                            There you have it



                            Never tested this before , Allah knows best lol

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                            • #15
                              Re: Temper problems in potential spouse

                              Originally posted by Stoic Believer View Post
                              What would be a covert way to ask, in your opinion?
                              what does he/she do when something doesn't go right for him or her?

                              do you guys argue alot?

                              when she gets mad does she cry or argue?


                              these questions come to my head right now, so yeah. even in these questions you can learn more than anger issues etc.

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