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Is 17 too young to get married?

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  • Is 17 too young to get married?

    Salam alaikum. I was just wondering if you think 17 is too young to get married? Do you think a 17 year old would struggle with the the responsibilities of marriage or do you think it all comes down to the person?

    If she marries an older man who is like 25+ that would be better because inshallah he should be able to provide and would have a career and is mature so can lead the marriage and his wife in the deen.

    Or do you advise waiting until 20 years old or something?
    I beg my parents for money

  • #2
    Re: Is 17 too young to get married?

    pretty sure a 17-year-old can't marry a 25-year-old man in the majority of the western countries. And another thing, most people tend to marry people close to their age, it is not common for them to have 8 year age difference just look at any countries marriage stats.

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    • #3
      Re: Is 17 too young to get married?

      Originally posted by AishaGirl View Post
      Salam alaikum. I was just wondering if you think 17 is too young to get married? Do you think a 17 year old would struggle with the the responsibilities of marriage or do you think it all comes down to the person?

      If she marries an older man who is like 25+ that would be better because inshallah he should be able to provide and would have a career and is mature so can lead the marriage and his wife in the deen.

      Or do you advise waiting until 20 years old or something?
      :wswrwb:

      It all depends on the maturity of the individuals, of course.

      However, in my experience most people at that age, both boys and girls, are quite immature. I don't see it wise to get married at that age, personally.

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      • #4
        Re: Is 17 too young to get married?

        Originally posted by snowtrees View Post
        pretty sure a 17-year-old can't marry a 25-year-old man in the majority of the western countries. And another thing, most people tend to marry people close to their age, it is not common for them to have 8 year age difference just look at any countries marriage stats.
        Legally marry no but they could still "date".

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        • #5
          Re: Is 17 too young to get married?

          :wswrwb:

          It's possible, but the girl will have to be mature for her age. Most 17 year old girls here are not mature. But, you could be in the minority. Make istikhara.
          ***Reminder- It was narrated from ‘Abd-Allaah ibn Mas’ood that RasulAllah :saw: said: Whoever reads Tabaarak allaathi bi yadihi’l-mulk [i.e., Soorat al-Mulk] every night, Allaah will protect him from the torment of the grave.
          And never think that Allah is unaware of what the wrongdoers do. He only delays them for a Day when eyes will stare [in horror]. [Quran, 14:42]

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          • #6
            Re: Is 17 too young to get married?

            :wswrwb:

            It depends on the individual. Youngsters can be quite wise. Some of them make me look bad, REAL bad I mean, because of THEM I I have to be mature. Give me a break. :zzz:

            I'm glad I didn't get married at seventeen, phew waaaaay :1popcorn: it would've been too much of a shock for me.

            If you're ready to compromise for another person, that's a good sign. If you're selfish and don't want to share a piece of cake with anyone than I can relate and I understand the feeling.
            'Whatever it be wherein ye differ, the decision thereof is with Allah: such is Allah my Lord: In Him I trust, and to Him I turn.' The Holy Qu'ran Al Shura (Consultation)

            So, which of the favours of your lord will you deny? ~ Surah Ar Rahman

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            • #7
              Re: Is 17 too young to get married?

              Originally posted by AishaGirl View Post
              Salam alaikum. I was just wondering if you think 17 is too young to get married? Do you think a 17 year old would struggle with the the responsibilities of marriage or do you think it all comes down to the person?

              If she marries an older man who is like 25+ that would be better because inshallah he should be able to provide and would have a career and is mature so can lead the marriage and his wife in the deen.

              Or do you advise waiting until 20 years old or something?
              depends if that 17 year old is mature enough and understands the rights and responsibilities that marriage brings about

              :wswrwb:
              sigpic

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              • #8
                Re: Is 17 too young to get married?

                :wswrwb:

                Two main things: Maturity and how much support they have from their parents.

                Oh and of course, knowledge of the deen/piety.
                Secure few moments, everyday, to reflect upon the innumerable blessings of Allah and thank Him for bestowing them upon you.

                "A person who is blessed with the ability to be grateful, shall never be deprived of barakah and increase in blessings."
                - Rasulullah (صلی اللہ علیہ وسلم)‎

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                • #9
                  Re: Is 17 too young to get married?

                  Originally posted by snowtrees View Post
                  pretty sure a 17-year-old can't marry a 25-year-old man in the majority of the western countries. And another thing, most people tend to marry people close to their age, it is not common for them to have 8 year age difference just look at any countries marriage stats.
                  We are not talking about kaffir marriage lol... In the UK age of consent is 16 so since islamic marriage is not recognised in western countries it doesn't really matter what the legal age for marriage is. As long as the age of consent is 16 or higher.
                  I beg my parents for money

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                  • #10
                    Re: Is 17 too young to get married?

                    Originally posted by AishaGirl View Post
                    Salam alaikum. I was just wondering if you think 17 is too young to get married? Do you think a 17 year old would struggle with the the responsibilities of marriage or do you think it all comes down to the person?

                    If she marries an older man who is like 25+ that would be better because inshallah he should be able to provide and would have a career and is mature so can lead the marriage and his wife in the deen.

                    Or do you advise waiting until 20 years old or something?
                    Why would she marry someone 25? She doesn't need a husband to provide for her. Doesn't her father already do that? If someone married that young I'd assume they were marrying someone of similar age and situation, eg two students.

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      Re: Is 17 too young to get married?

                      If she's happy to get married and ready for it mentally (as she expresses)... let her go ahead... she may not understand what it is before she marries... but she'll grow up to understand and accustom herself to it...

                      Young people are more adaptive than the older ones in my experience, their personality is still shaping...

                      Again, it boils down to how ready a person feels they are... my first proposal was at the age of 17... I was like NOOOOO ... so it was a no

                      Let me also add... her family have to be mature to help her handle her issues, if they'll start taking sides and encouraging any immaturity from her side... this may not work out...
                      Last edited by malleat1; 22-01-17, 11:43 PM.
                      *
                      *
                      * typing from my phone, excuse the mess

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                      • #12
                        Re: Is 17 too young to get married?

                        Originally posted by Ya'sin View Post
                        :wswrwb:
                        If you're ready to compromise for another person, that's a good sign. If you're selfish and don't want to share a piece of cake with anyone than I can relate and I understand the feeling.
                        lol I am quite selfish I guess.
                        I beg my parents for money

                        Comment


                        • #13
                          Re: Is 17 too young to get married?

                          Originally posted by snowtrees View Post
                          pretty sure a 17-year-old can't marry a 25-year-old man in the majority of the western countries. And another thing, most people tend to marry people close to their age, it is not common for them to have 8 year age difference just look at any countries marriage stats.
                          Originally posted by quark View Post
                          Legally marry no but they could still "date".
                          In the US you can so long as you get parental consent. I'm not sure about other Western countries but I assume it's the same.
                          Narrated Anas:
                          The Prophet (ﷺ) said, "None of you will have faith till he wishes for his (Muslim) brother what he likes for himself." [Bukhari]

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                          • #14
                            Re: Is 17 too young to get married?

                            :wswrwb:

                            it all comes down to the person. i know someone who is that age or close to and getting married to someone who is 25 lols. what a coincidence!

                            anyways, to me she seems very mature and grounded. and though the age gap is ~8 years, for some reason those two ages seem compatible. ultimately it comes down to the two individuals.
                            Indeed we belong to Allah,
                            and indeed to Him we will return.


                            Quran 2:156

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                            • #15
                              Re: Is 17 too young to get married?

                              Originally posted by quark View Post
                              Why would she marry someone 25? She doesn't need a husband to provide for her. Doesn't her father already do that? If someone married that young I'd assume they were marrying someone of similar age and situation, eg two students.
                              Because how on earth can another student provide for their wife? If you marry someone who is 25+ they have probably got their lives sorted by then and so can provide all the essentials.
                              I beg my parents for money

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