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    Re: problems with men today

    Originally posted by Sorrow' View Post
    From what I've heard, Sweden has very promiscuous people. Ergh.

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      Re: problems with men today

      Originally posted by P1RAT3N View Post
      lol No I am not Arab even tho I speak fluent arabic. I am born and raised in Sweden hence my referal to Swedish people xD
      I know u born and raised in Sweden but still u have origin .. what's that ? u don't have to answer if u don't feel like it :)
      How merciful Allah on me by giving me respite,and I persist in my sins and Allah shields me

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        Re: problems with men today

        Originally posted by P1RAT3N View Post
        Like zina there is in abundance among the people. Correct?

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          Re: problems with men today

          Originally posted by myeverything View Post
          I know u born and raised in Sweden but still u have origin .. what's that ? u don't have to answer if u don't feel like it :)
          Oh my.. Everyone knows I am Swedish now... getting popular I see..

          My parents are from two (different) countries outside of Europe. They are not arab nor do they have arabic roots. I dunno but they learned arabic somehow and decided to make it my mother language. I grew in Sweden being independent only by following Islamic rules. They did never let their cultures influence me in any way and I never saw any cultural stuff in our house. It's either islamic rules or nothing at all.

          Actually, I dont know what to call myself. So I just say Swedish cuz I am born there and it's easier that way. But tbh I don't feel like belonging in any country.

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            Re: problems with men today

            Originally posted by Sorrow' View Post
            Like zina there is in abundance among the people. Correct?
            Hard to say... But I can somehow agree on that.

            If it's more than other countries, idk sorry but I can't answer because I never set foot somewhere else to be able to give proper info.

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              Re: problems with men today

              Originally posted by P1RAT3N View Post
              Oh my.. Everyone knows I am Swedish now... getting popular I see..

              My parents are from two (different) countries outside of Europe. They are not arab nor do they have arabic roots. I dunno but they learned arabic somehow and decided to make it my mother language. I grew in Sweden being independent only by following Islamic rules. They did never let their cultures influence me in any way and I never saw any cultural stuff in our house. It's either islamic rules or nothing at all.

              Actually, I dont know what to call myself. So I just say Swedish cuz I am born there and it's easier that way. But tbh I don't feel like belonging in any country.
              Alhamdulliah for following Islamic rules in your household. Actually the answer to my question was somehow in the bold part:) But It's OK as I said earlier

              Originally posted by myeverything View Post
              I know u born and raised in Sweden but still u have origin .. what's that ? u don't have to answer if u don't feel like it :)
              How merciful Allah on me by giving me respite,and I persist in my sins and Allah shields me

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                Re: problems with men today

                Originally posted by Rumaysah~ View Post
                What is it to be the one in charge of your home and the one that has authority?

                men these days seem to complain too much. complaining about women, their wives, feminism, complaining about their wives/women complaining, how tired they are when they get home, how women 'nag' them as soon as they step in. All the time complaining!

                Why are you complaining, just deal with it. So what if your wife doesn't cook when you get home and she starts talking about other things you didn't want to hear. Why can't she do that? she's a woman. Why can't you handle it?

                Why do we always have to tell sisters be like this when a man is upset or be like that when he comes home, don't talk too much, make sure the food is done etc
                when we don't tell brothers the same thing about women, that she is doing things like this because there is an issue going on with her and you're supposed to find a way to deal with it. Not sulk, get angry, over emotional and complain. This is what women do.

                I dont know where you have seen this kind of men sister.I am a convert and I have seen how both muslims and non muslims behaving completely different then the kind of man you describe.Anyway,you are right.A woman who is happy will never behave in a way that will "tire" a man.And of course they cant deal with it,we arent that mentally strong to deal with a woman who "nags",but if we all learnt how the Prophet saws behaved with his wives,if we learn that in details before we even search for a wife,then we will never have an unhappy wife who nags.If one side of the coin is straight,the other side is straight too.I guess whats left is to make the right questions before marriage to see how "straight" the brother is :) ...
                ULTIMA RATIO REGUM

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                  Re: problems with men today

                  soo._ ya complaining about men complaining ?

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                    Re: problems with men today

                    Originally posted by myeverything View Post
                    yes, I admit it .. it's the majority u r 100 % right, but does that make him the best option for a woman ? I don't think so .. a woman will try her best to look for the better man who usually makes part of the minority. Because quality traits of a man ( can apply to women too) mostly lies in minority and not in majority, generally speaking. Plus,men can't be busier than prophet ( peace be upon him) and he did help out his wives.

                    to consider helping your wife with house chores is lunacy is extreme. But let's say u didn't mean it literally. In this case I would say a healthy/ less stressful marriage/successful enjoyable marriage demands a degree of lunacy ( from both sides) that's just my views^^

                    As a women who did little to zero housework all her life, I don't mind housework, cooking ..etc ..( i think it's a bit awesome/ cute to try the role of traditional wife at least for a change) .. life is endless adventures and experiences for me

                    It's just the mindset itself that I can't stand it .. that a man put house chores at top of his priority list while searching for a wife .. It's a big put off and a red flag for me, dunno about other women, though.

                    I wrote too much lol

                    OK In short, It's the man's stance on housework that matters most to me. If he sees it as obligatory on the wife and it's her duty and she MUST do it/has no favor in doing it. See her as a less of a wife and at fault if stops doing that for a while or so, for whatever reason .. then he's not man enough for me .. he can hire a maid better ..

                    On the other hand, if the man asks his wife to cook him a meal, clean house, do laundry ..etc but he's deep inside convinced it's not obligatory on her to do it and doesn't make a big fuss of it if she fall short in housework/ cooking ..etc ..from time to time and generally he see it as Ihsan/ favor of her then yes .. that's the man in my eyes.

                    However, I do urge women to try to make life comfy and cozy for their husbands, especially if they're housewives and he works long hours. But still there're off days/ weekends/ vacations that can show true color of men and their true stance of the house chores and wives ...




                    couldn't agree more.
                    I did not say not helping, I'm pointing out that for the majority of marriages the majority of the housework is done by women. Even for those women that work they still do the bulk of the work. I think if I were to suggest otherwise would be an insult to women. If a husband say does 5-10% of the housework is still means 90-95% is done by the wife. It's not even worth mentioning he does this. Yes it's better than nothing and I'm sure she'll say she's grateful for it but really it's not much and she could easily do all of it.

                    He'll have this artificial warm glow over him because he'll think he's doing his bit. What's worse is that much of that work he'll do as and when it pleases him. In that case she still is carrying a load of stress because she does not know if X is going to get done and whether she'll end up picking it up.

                    Either a husband should do a sizeable % or otherwise just do that 5% and keep quiet about it.

                    I posted once what I do but can't find it. Have a search for it...maybe I need to make some mods to it.

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                      Re: problems with men today

                      This argument is really weird.

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                        Re: problems with men today

                        Originally posted by AmantuBillahi View Post
                        In islam the women are to serve and be obident to their husbands.
                        The prophet (saws) said that prostration to other than Allah is forbidden but had it been allowed then it would be the women prostration to their husbands(brief summary of hadith)

                        That being the case , women should do all they can like make sure their husbands are satisfied in all possible ways. That is a means of them getting closer to Allah. That's your job. Obviously being obident in that which is halal and not obidience in sin.

                        That being said , I believe you are correct in that you said , men shouldn't complain about everything. True , we should deal with it even though it's not perfect. Understand that our rights are not being fulfilled, the world is a mess - which is why we are complaining. Never the less , complaining doesn't solve the world's problems, being firm and proving with actions and deeds certainly does help.

                        Make du'a for us "men" inshallah. We are in the end times. Allah knows our situations.
                        Lol what the hell. Don't remember typing this message. Cringe.

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                          Re: problems with men today

                          Originally posted by AmantuBillahi View Post
                          Lol what the hell. Don't remember typing this message. Cringe.
                          Why is it cringe?

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                            Re: problems with men today

                            Originally posted by factory View Post
                            Why is it cringe?
                            I sound so bitter , and I'm talking kind of lame. Oh well.

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                              Re: problems with men today

                              Originally posted by Deen95 View Post
                              I think the op just does not like cooking.
                              You've got her all figured out
                              she might even be allergic to kitchens
                              شَكَوْتُ إلَى وَكِيعٍ سُوءَ حِفْظِي
                              فَأرْشَدَنِي إلَى تَرْكِ المعَاصي
                              وَأخْبَرَنِي بأَنَّ العِلْمَ نُورٌ
                              ونورُ الله لا يهدى لعاصي

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                                Re: problems with men today

                                The problem I see is in the Muslim women, is that they demand the world be given to them and put pressure on the men.

                                Talk about a more flagrant abuse of 'power'. Do one wrong, and you're useless; trying to make right and you're not a real man and she puts on an attitude. How do you defeat the hungry devil in her?

                                All these Muslim women, for no other reason than pure black evil, put on pounds of makeup and flaunt themselves in tight attire to make the lives of men more difficult. They wish to court many men, only to strip their worth, laugh at them, and proceed destroying them. It's all a sick sport. A vy for attention and making themselves feel better to the detriment of guess who? The men. Are they that sad that they have to put down the opposite gender to feel valuable? People.with cognizance see all this show for what it is: useless.

                                Even non-Muslims do not play games the way these Muslim women I see play. They don't try to strip your worth because she can and you're a man, so put up with it.

                                Such blackness and treachery.

                                This is why I avoid such women like the black plague. Their negative aura only life sucks out.
                                Last edited by Prince_of; 09-11-17, 07:02 PM.

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