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How do I stop obsessing over marriage?

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  • #16
    Re: How do I stop obsessing over marriage?

    :salams

    If you marry her, and have no job, will you live apart and get together once in a while? If after graduation you want to live with her, how will you support her, and if you get a child, how will you manage that?

    I am not saying to not to marry, but rather try to think a little forward and have a plan,etc.

    And Allah SWT knows best.
    La ilaha illallahu, wahdahu la sharika lahu, lahul-mulku wa lahul-hamdu, wa Huwa 'ala kulli sha'in Qadir
    (there is no true god except Allah. He is One and He has no partner with Him; His is the sovereignty and His is the praise, and He is Omnipotent),'
    Do not say about Allah but Truth.

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    • #17
      Re: How do I stop obsessing over marriage?

      Stop thinking about her.. For all we know she's most likely married already.. Focus on your education!
      I love you, cherish you and worship you,
      Guide me on your path to your janna,
      Unite me beside you My King and all mighty,


      :love:Allah:love:

      Comment


      • #18
        Re: How do I stop obsessing over marriage?

        Originally posted by .mirror. View Post
        Do you have her on Facebook?
        No. Nor on any other social media.

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        • #19
          Re: How do I stop obsessing over marriage?

          Do you fast regularly? If not, you should start.

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          • #20
            Re: How do I stop obsessing over marriage?

            Originally posted by Striving for Janna View Post
            No. Nor on any other social media.
            So do you speak to her?
            Secure few moments, everyday, to reflect upon the innumerable blessings of Allah and thank Him for bestowing them upon you.

            "A person who is blessed with the ability to be grateful, shall never be deprived of barakah and increase in blessings."
            - Rasulullah (صلی اللہ علیہ وسلم)‎

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            • #21
              Re: How do I stop obsessing over marriage?

              Originally posted by .mirror. View Post
              So do you speak to her?
              No, because we live far apart and talking over the phone would not be modest.

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              • #22
                Re: How do I stop obsessing over marriage?

                Idle mind is never a good thing get yourself busy with important stuff. Dedicate yourself to something. Surround yourself with righteous friends.
                '' WE LIVE IN AN INTERESTING TIME, WHERE THE 'ILM (KNOWLEDGE) OF A PERSON IS JUDGED BY HOW FAMOUS THE PERSON IS.''


                - IMAM ANWAR AL 'AWLAQI.

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                • #23
                  Re: How do I stop obsessing over marriage?

                  Why do you want to marry her?

                  لا تفكر كثيرا
                  بل استغفر كثيرا

                  -------------------------------------------------------
                  The children need your prayers more than anyone else
                  -------------------------------------------------------
                  www.inheritorsofquran.wordpress.com

                  Comment


                  • #24
                    Re: How do I stop obsessing over marriage?

                    Originally posted by F_R View Post
                    Why do you want to marry her?
                    she was my close friend and playmate as a child, I have many fond memories of her, our mothers used to be friends back when I lived in her city, our fathers are still friends, she is part of the same jamaat, she is also Muslim, she is also Turkish, she comes from a good family, and she is beautiful....

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                    • #25
                      Re: How do I stop obsessing over marriage?

                      Originally posted by Striving for Janna View Post
                      she was my close friend and playmate as a child, I have many fond memories of her, our mothers used to be friends back when I lived in her city, our fathers are still friends, she is part of the same jamaat, she is also Muslim, she is also Turkish, she comes from a good family, and she is beautiful....
                      Awwwwwwwwwwwww

                      When was the last time you saw her or met her in person?

                      لا تفكر كثيرا
                      بل استغفر كثيرا

                      -------------------------------------------------------
                      The children need your prayers more than anyone else
                      -------------------------------------------------------
                      www.inheritorsofquran.wordpress.com

                      Comment


                      • #26
                        Re: How do I stop obsessing over marriage?

                        Originally posted by F_R View Post
                        Awwwwwwwwwwwww

                        When was the last time you saw her or met her in person?
                        I last saw her when I was 13 and almost 14, and I last talked to her when I was 10.... just turned 17 this march 2016....

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                        • #27
                          Re: How do I stop obsessing over marriage?

                          Originally posted by Striving for Janna View Post
                          I last saw her when I was 13 and almost 14, and I last talked to her when I was 10.... just turned 17 this march 2016....
                          That is a very very very long time ago. You are talking about marrying a girl from a few years ago which honestly may no longer exist at all. It's time you let go of that idea or person from few years back. People change and she probably has too. The only way to marry her is to go back in time but time travel is yet to be discovered.

                          Have a great morning.

                          لا تفكر كثيرا
                          بل استغفر كثيرا

                          -------------------------------------------------------
                          The children need your prayers more than anyone else
                          -------------------------------------------------------
                          www.inheritorsofquran.wordpress.com

                          Comment


                          • #28
                            Re: How do I stop obsessing over marriage?

                            Originally posted by Striving for Janna View Post
                            Like I told you guys in previous threads, I am interested in marrying a sister I was friends with as a child, who I live far away from....my mom is angering me because she refuses to contact the girl's family until after I graduate college (5 YEARS AWAY!!!! (I'm 17, and in 11th grade) ).......I told her I would contact the girl's father after high school, but my mom said she would never forgive me and I "could forget about marrying any Turkish girl" WHAT DO I DO????? how do I stop obsessing over this sister, when do I contact the girl's wali, how much influence should my mother have, how do I deal with her (my mom), and what do I DO?????

                            How are you going to provide for your family if you don't have a job? or anything in place. Its not just about marrying for the sake of it, there's a lot to consider. Your mom is totally right in this situation. Concentrate on your studies. Stop obsessing over marriage, its not all that great when reality hits you.

                            Also, you don't even know if this sister is even interested in you in the first place. Please, stop setting yourself up for potential disappointment.

                            If you're still adamant, then you could suggest to your mom (only if she agrees) that maybe your family could discuss an engagement with her, then get married later. However, there is no guarantee, this will work. Anything can change.


                            Do not do anything if your family are against it. As I said before, you have no idea about the sisters circumstances.

                            Also, I'm not sure why you're remembering her, after all this time, you were children then. Who knows, how much she has changed.

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