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  • waniya
    replied
    Re: met partner on internet

    dangerous if you're not careful but also quite common nowadays

    i've heard of many successful relationships that were formed online and some that turned scary. only do it if you are wise, go in with your eyes wide open and stand your ground. a lot... A LOT of them will claim on matrimonial websites especially that they are looking for marriage - even taking the time to write out an impressive profile - but deep down most are just there for the obvious reasons. to find someone to do the nitty gritty with. if you want marriage only, make sure they know you are only there for marriage. any rude stuff and you'll walk. don't be quickly fooled by pics, anyone can post fake model pictures. and upon meeting TAKE SOMEONE WITH YOU!!! or meet in public place

    Leave a comment:


  • aynina
    replied
    Re: met partner on internet

    Originally posted by ForeverMonotheist1 View Post
    the divorce part scares me to death, for a guy who is cold as ice.

    maybe the rate of divorce amongst cybercouples is very high?
    i dont think that had much to do with it, the first month of marriage he was the guy i met online, the guy i tought hed be, but i saw him change in front of my eyes, so its not as if he wasnt the guy i met online, he was, but also being a girl and falling in love is the dumbest thing we can do ( before nikah)
    simply because the love blinds ourselves to the reality, thats why a wali is most important wali wali wali wali wali

    Leave a comment:


  • Fragile
    replied
    Re: met partner on internet

    Let's just say when I hinted that I'm looking for potentials online because they can't see me and would know me personally, the real me blah blah there was an immediate family meeting and I was in a lot of trouble.. so basically they had a valid point and it's best to avoid such a route.

    Leave a comment:


  • brothernd
    replied
    Re: met partner on internet

    Originally posted by missnadia View Post
    salam, what do you guys think abuot finding your partner on internet, such as facebook, chat?

    I know this is not the right way. but what if you come on chat without the intention to meet anyone, but only to kill time. and you meet someone online and he is a good Muslim boy. You talk a few months but still without any intentions and you finally tell what you tink about each other and want to married each other, because you feel that you ment to be together. Islam is hmdl good and everything else is also good. Would you married or would you still think of the way how you have met. and just stop. because everthing is mektab. and chat is not the way and i know talking without mahram is not good.

    He had no job because if he had we were now maybe made it officieel. He maybe wil have a job this week in sha allah and than we want to see each other for few minutes beacause i only know how his personality is i have never seen him. because we both dont want that. But i dont care how he looks and he also tells that.
    i really want to marry him because he is hmdl a good persoon and i know him almost 2 jaar now and we talk about everything, our idea's and our personality are the same. the only thing we dont know is how we look its like we are scared :p I'm now only think if allah forgive me and if is this mektab. because i really didn't wanted this. but i'm hmdl happy to have met him. i dont like to speek to guys in regulair day so i really dont know how i will met some one and i know that there are other ways but this is for me the best way to really know everthng about the person. And now i'm really sure that i am not talking to a catfish:p. We already talk about what we would do in the future if we are married etc.

    Sorry for my english i'm from a nother country

    i tried my best.
    You do not know his personality. You only know him through what you think about him in your mind using the words he presents on the screen. E.g. reading a book on the xyz may be so awesome for people because our imaginations are awesome, but when people see the movie xyz, they are disappointed.

    If you do not have an intention and keep talking, then shaytan will mess up your intentions. Get your wali involved if you guys are serious!
    What langauge do you speak? Use google translate if possible : )

    Leave a comment:


  • shay5
    replied
    Re: met partner on internet

    sister, a lot is wrong with what you have done...also men do not have issue showing their photo so him not showing you is strange...I am happy that you have not taken it further as these situations can get very messy ie photos, skyping.
    Your next step should be to get your wali involved...asap...even if he does not want to marry now...it could end very badly if you do not get your wali involved..

    Leave a comment:


  • ForeverMonotheist1
    replied
    Re: met partner on internet

    Originally posted by aynina View Post
    Ur belgian or Dutch sis?
    Im belgian lol i saw by some words u are as well

    I met my husband online as well, we are in a divorce atm but that doesnt really have to do with the fact that we met online, it is not a halal way to meet someone but now that you did, you might be able to give it into the hands of your wali? So that your wali can sort the guy out and give the final decision... thats what i wish i had done at the time but im a revert and i didnt have a wali and i didnt realise it was that important

    A wali is very important sis


    the divorce part scares me to death, for a guy who is cold as ice.

    maybe the rate of divorce amongst cybercouples is very high?

    Leave a comment:


  • ugabs
    replied
    Re: met partner on internet

    That was painful to read on so many levels...

    I hope Allah gives you enough sense to involve your wali and listen to his advice

    Leave a comment:


  • zi-zizou
    replied
    Re: met partner on internet

    Gonna end in tears.

    Leave a comment:


  • aynina
    replied
    Re: met partner on internet

    Ur belgian or Dutch sis?
    Im belgian lol i saw by some words u are as well

    I met my husband online as well, we are in a divorce atm but that doesnt really have to do with the fact that we met online, it is not a halal way to meet someone but now that you did, you might be able to give it into the hands of your wali? So that your wali can sort the guy out and give the final decision... thats what i wish i had done at the time but im a revert and i didnt have a wali and i didnt realise it was that important

    A wali is very important sis

    Leave a comment:


  • Khan8
    replied
    Re: met partner on internet

    Originally posted by ~TwinklingStar~ View Post
    Sister, it's easy to fall for someone's charms online because you don't really know who's behind the screen. There are lots of players out there with wicked intentions who're experts in manipulating the emotional nature of women. So, be careful. Don't be fooled by sweet/religious talk.

    Involve your parents & elders in finding a suitable partner for you - a man who has good deen & akhlaq.

    If this man you met online is serious about you, ask him to contact your family at the earliest. If he refuses to do so or makes excuses or wants to delay doing so for whatever reason, cut all contact with him (which you should be doing anyways). Don't ever, ever,ever meet him privately or share any private info like pictures/numbers with him.

    You don't want to be another number among the countless number of victims of cyber-love crimes.
    Could be an ISIS recruiter too haha

    Leave a comment:


  • ~TwinklingStar~
    replied
    Re: met partner on internet

    Sister, it's easy to fall for someone's charms online because you don't really know who's behind the screen. There are lots of players out there with wicked intentions who're experts in manipulating the emotional nature of women. So, be careful. Don't be fooled by sweet/religious talk.

    Involve your parents & elders in finding a suitable partner for you - a man who has good deen & akhlaq.

    If this man you met online is serious about you, ask him to contact your family at the earliest. If he refuses to do so or makes excuses or wants to delay doing so for whatever reason, cut all contact with him (which you should be doing anyways). Don't ever, ever,ever meet him privately or share any private info like pictures/numbers with him.

    You don't want to be another number among the countless number of victims of cyber-love crimes.

    Leave a comment:


  • Khan8
    replied
    Re: met partner on internet

    This is not the way to do it, all kind of private interactions between non-mahrams is haram.

    Leave a comment:


  • Winter
    replied
    Re: met partner on internet

    :salams

    Looks will matter, you and him can say now it doesn't, but trust me it will. Second thing is you'll never know someone till you live with them, how many Muslim as well as Non-Muslim have dated or talk to someone for years, but yet their marriage ended? Whenever you speak to someone they'll always be in their best behavior, manners, etc. Doesn't mean the person is the same behind closed doors. Please get your father (wali) involved and don't continue on talking to him.

    Leave a comment:


  • ForeverMonotheist1
    replied
    Re: met partner on internet

    Originally posted by missnadia View Post
    what is the big diffrence about meeting someone on the street and on internet only you will see each other ? i never want to meet someone on the street.


    On street i mean seeing that person a lot, then one day the guy does proposal.
    Not the kaafir way of asking woman for her number.


    I prefer spouse through family.

    Leave a comment:


  • missnadia
    replied
    Re: met partner on internet

    Originally posted by ForeverMonotheist1 View Post
    From my own experience, its not good to look for marriage on fb and other sociat networks.
    Only sometimes it works.

    Better to find wife/husband on the street, through mosque or family.
    what is the big diffrence about meeting someone on the street and on internet only you will see each other ? i never want to meet someone on the street.

    Leave a comment:

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