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  • Yes or no?

    :salams

    I've got a proposal (hes all good ma shaa Allah), but i'm not so sure whether to accept it due to my age. I'm 17 and don't know if its the best age to settle down with regards to marriage. Your suggestions would be helpful.

    Jazak Allahu Kharian.
    All humans are dead, except those who have knowledge.
    And all those who have knowledge are asleep, except those who do good deeds.
    And those who do good deeds are deceived, except those who are sincere.
    And those who are sincere are always in a state of worry.”

    Imam Shafi'i (رحمه الله)

  • #2
    Re: Yes or no?

    Originally posted by vildan View Post
    :salams

    I've got a proposal (hes all good ma shaa Allah), but i'm not so sure whether to accept it due to my age. I'm 17 and don't know if its the best age to settle down with regards to marriage. Your suggestions would be helpful.

    Jazak Allahu Kharian.
    If he seems like he has almost everything you're looking for and you're not completely scared of marriage why not?!!!
    Indeed we belong to Allah,
    and indeed to Him we will return.


    Quran 2:156

    Comment


    • #3
      Re: Yes or no?

      Originally posted by ninety1daisies View Post
      If he seems like he has almost everything you're looking for and you're not completely scared of marriage why not?!!!
      Yes he is Alhamdulillah, but i'm kinda scared/nervous idk why, and to top it off i'm indecisive so this is probably the hardest decision of my life.
      All humans are dead, except those who have knowledge.
      And all those who have knowledge are asleep, except those who do good deeds.
      And those who do good deeds are deceived, except those who are sincere.
      And those who are sincere are always in a state of worry.”

      Imam Shafi'i (رحمه الله)

      Comment


      • #4
        Re: Yes or no?

        Originally posted by vildan View Post
        :salams

        I've got a proposal (hes all good ma shaa Allah), but i'm not so sure whether to accept it due to my age. I'm 17 and don't know if its the best age to settle down with regards to marriage. Your suggestions would be helpful.

        Jazak Allahu Kharian.
        Wa 'alaykum salaam wa-rahmatullah wa-barakatuh.

        There's no particular or "specific age for marriage."
        It all depends on you.
        Do you think you're ready?
        Do you know enough about marriage in Islam?
        Have you consulted your parents/wali?
        What does your father or parents think?

        There are many factors to it, and only you can decide at the end of the day.
        Make istikharah in shaa Allah.

        If this man if best for you, may Allah make you two get married and bless your marriage in this world and Aakhirah.
        *"None of you truly believes until he loves for his brother what he loves for himself."* [Al-Bukhari & Muslim]
        "Mindless are those who only jump when told to jump, cry when told to cry, and laugh when told to laugh. Indeed, they are but sheep." TheStrivingUmmi

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        • #5
          Re: Yes or no?

          Originally posted by vildan View Post
          Yes he is Alhamdulillah, but i'm kinda scared/nervous idk why, and to top it off i'm indecisive so this is probably the hardest decision of my life.
          Isthikharah my darling. InshaAllah if he is the one you'll know because it's written.
          Indeed we belong to Allah,
          and indeed to Him we will return.


          Quran 2:156

          Comment


          • #6
            Re: Yes or no?

            Originally posted by vildan View Post
            :salams

            I've got a proposal (hes all good ma shaa Allah), but i'm not so sure whether to accept it due to my age. I'm 17 and don't know if its the best age to settle down with regards to marriage. Your suggestions would be helpful.

            Jazak Allahu Kharian.
            Masha allah villy!! You def been busy sis;)
            Do istikharah hehe, thats all I can think of. You're actually handling this well. I'd panic and stress over figuring things out.
            do what you like though. Don't worry what other ppl think. Everyone matures differently, age has little to do with anything if you feel you are ready. My friend's mom married at her late 30s out of her own choice, and one of my cousins married at around your age a few years back and just became a mom:inlove: and both felt ready at different times.
            [MENTION=131974]Creamcake[/MENTION] :o
            Thee do we worship, and Thine aid we seek.

            Comment


            • #7
              Re: Yes or no?

              Wow how can someone get married that young.

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              • #8
                Originally posted by Romero123 View Post
                Wow how can someone get married that young.
                The younger the better

                Comment


                • #9
                  Re: Yes or no?

                  Oyy I'm expecting a pm with more details!!
                  Indeed we belong to Allah,
                  and indeed to Him we will return.


                  Quran 2:156

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    Originally posted by vildan View Post
                    :salams

                    I've got a proposal (hes all good ma shaa Allah), but i'm not so sure whether to accept it due to my age. I'm 17 and don't know if its the best age to settle down with regards to marriage. Your suggestions would be helpful.

                    Jazak Allahu Kharian.
                    Istikhaarah is imperative here little sis. There is no age specification for marriage in islam. Just have tawakkul and do what your heart tells you. May Allah help you in making the best decision.

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      Re: Yes or no?

                      Originally posted by Deeni Akh View Post
                      The younger the better
                      Maybe but she's still a teenager. Few years ahead she may think differently. But it's the OP's decision at the end of the day and I wish her the best.
                      Originally posted by ninety1daisies View Post
                      Oyy I'm expecting a pm with more details!!
                      So nosey.

                      Comment


                      • #12
                        Re: Yes or no?

                        Originally posted by vildan View Post
                        :salams

                        I've got a proposal (hes all good ma shaa Allah), but i'm not so sure whether to accept it due to my age. I'm 17 and don't know if its the best age to settle down with regards to marriage. Your suggestions would be helpful.

                        Jazak Allahu Kharian.
                        Wa Alaykumussalam

                        Hey Villy, I cannot believe sis that the minute I actually log outta UF, I miss such an important thread from my dear sister. So sis it's entirely up to you. I know you're 17, but imo that's not too young at all, its just that society makes us feel like it's a young age if that makes sense, but in reality it's not. How do u feel about it? You said it's a good proposal, so Alhamdulillah you're happy with it, Masha ' Allah,I think.. don't stop age from being a determining factor. I know you're 17, but none of us on here would have guessed that, (before u told us, a while back), because you're so mature, honestly, there's nothing that you can't do, and it's not like you're not ready in the sense of being able to settle down. Whether u feel ready yourself dear sis, is a different thing, how are u feeling atm? Like people can honestly settle down at all ages, I've known people personally getting a nikkah at 18, and some like at 40 and older, so its definitely up to you sis. Just think about it, like there's no immediate rush or pressure either way, as u know dear sis.

                        So make Du'aa and Istikhaarah. And in regards to your opinion atm, are u leaning more towards a certain side atm, or you're entirely undecided? Age is only a factor if you let it be. And it really depends on how you feel, and whether you want to. I think naturally irrespective of our age etc, we all feel nervous and apprehensive when it comes to marriage, and no one can ever feel fully ready, because it's a new experience for everyone. Okay, Lol I've talked enough now haha, I am so happy to hear this sis Masha ' Allah, and let us know what you decide :)
                        And with Him are the keys of the Ghayb (all that is hidden), none knows them but He. And He knows whatever there is in the land and in the sea; not a leaf falls, but He knows it. There is not a grain in the darkness of the earth nor anything fresh or dry, but is written in a Clear Record”
                        [al-An’aam 6:59]

                        Comment


                        • #13
                          Re: Yes or no?

                          Originally posted by Figs View Post
                          Masha allah villy!! You def been busy sis;)
                          Do istikharah hehe, thats all I can think of. You're actually handling this well. I'd panic and stress over figuring things out.
                          do what you like though. Don't worry what other ppl think. Everyone matures differently, age has little to do with anything if you feel you are ready. My friend's mom married at her late 30s out of her own choice, and one of my cousins married at around your age a few years back and just became a mom:inlove: and both felt ready at different times.
                          [MENTION=131974]Creamcake[/MENTION] :o
                          Thanks for that Figsy! Lol I cannot believe the 1 moment I'm actually logged outta UF, that Villy made this thread. I fully agree with everything u said, age is definitely just a number! Because ppl can marry young or old, and even young and old are determined by society, I've known ppl marry Villy's age, and then ppl marry a lot older, so it depends definitely on how she feels. And making Istikhaara of course. Lol I'd panic and stress over proposals haha when I get them, I do get panicky about them lool! only an individual knows themselves. we're all naturally gonna feel nervous, because its the start of a new journey, and a new experience reading this thread made me happy, whatever she decides of course :)
                          And with Him are the keys of the Ghayb (all that is hidden), none knows them but He. And He knows whatever there is in the land and in the sea; not a leaf falls, but He knows it. There is not a grain in the darkness of the earth nor anything fresh or dry, but is written in a Clear Record”
                          [al-An’aam 6:59]

                          Comment


                          • #14
                            Re: Yes or no?

                            Originally posted by ninety1daisies View Post
                            Oyy I'm expecting a pm with more details!!
                            Looool ninety you made me laugh so hard lol masha allah:D
                            [MENTION=131974]Creamcake[/MENTION] lol yea I ntocied you didn't post and I wanted ya to come straight away. :)
                            And ya welcome too Creamy, anytime;)
                            Thee do we worship, and Thine aid we seek.

                            Comment


                            • #15
                              Re: Yes or no?

                              Wa alaikumsalam. Like others have said, pray isthikaarah. I feel it's too young, I know someone close to me marry at that age too. All I can say is, you need to be well informed. Don't let things cloud or influence you. Be firm and decisive. It's gonna be affecting you the rest of your life. Know about the guy very well before you make a decision and also his family.. Never figured you for 17. Maasha Allah. May Allah bless you and guide you in everything.

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