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Does respecting mother=Good to wife?

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  • #31
    Re: Does respecting mother=Good to wife?

    Whilst not a sure-fire guarantee, someone who knows how to treat women in his family is certainly a good start.

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    • #32
      Re: Does respecting mother=Good to wife?

      Originally posted by Plumeria View Post
      It didn't work out that way with me. My husband was the poster boy for obeying his mother (she's passed away now) and he isn't very kind towards me. Even though a man obviously knows his mother for his whole life, it shouldn't mean that his wife deserves less. His wife will eventually become a mother as well and he has to set an example for his children on how to respect their mother.

      And being obedient to mothers in the subcontinent usually means worshipping the ground they walk on, audobillah. Means, their mother can do wrong even if she is unfair. So, the two qualities can't really go hand in hand usually. :/
      Not only that, but I was just thinking...your mom takes care of you for about on average 20-25 years of your life, after that it's your spouse only. If you live on to the average age of around 80 or so, your wife will have taken care of you for longer than your mother did!

      Respect your wife and treat her well.

      Being good to his mother doesn't mean anything.
      Nothing is impossible with Allah:o

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      • #33
        Re: Does respecting mother=Good to wife?

        Originally posted by muslimgirl93 View Post
        Not only that, but I was just thinking...your mom takes care of you for about on average 20-25 years of your life, after that it's your spouse only. If you live on to the average age of around 80 or so, your wife will have taken care of you for longer than your mother did!

        Respect your wife and treat her well.

        Being good to his mother doesn't mean anything.
        Wow, that is just disrespectful to mothers everywhere.

        Did my wife carry me in her womb for 9 months? No. My wife will never do a tenth of what my mother did for me. Doesn't matter how long we're married.

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        • #34
          Re: Does respecting mother=Good to wife?

          Question for the sisters: if your husband is defending you in a dispute with your mother-in-law, and in the process he ends up saying something disrespectful to his mother, what would you do?

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          • #35
            Re: Does respecting mother=Good to wife?

            Originally posted by Stoic Believer View Post
            Wow, that is just disrespectful to mothers everywhere.

            Did my wife carry me in her womb for 9 months? No. My wife will never do a tenth of what my mother did for me. Doesn't matter how long we're married.
            I'm not equating the wife to the mother...I'm just pointing out that she will be taking care of you and be by your side for a very significant portion of your life...even though she didn't carry you...but she will be carrying your children. So she should be treated with great respect and kindness.
            Nothing is impossible with Allah:o

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            • #36
              Re: Does respecting mother=Good to wife?

              Originally posted by muslimgirl93 View Post
              I'm not equating the wife to the mother...I'm just pointing out that she will be taking care of you and be by your side for a very significant portion of your life...even though she didn't carry you...but she will be carrying your children. So she should be treated with great respect and kindness.
              Aight.

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              • #37
                Re: Does respecting mother=Good to wife?

                Originally posted by UmmTaymiyyah View Post
                As-salaamu 'alaikum wa rahmatullahi wa barakatuhu,

                Does a man's good treatment of his mother (respecting her,not talking back to her,obeying her and generally being a good and obedient son to her) equate to the man treating his future wife in a good manner? Is there a link between the two?

                Jazakallahu khairan!
                No.
                The Lyme Disease pandemic: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z5u73ME4sVU

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                • #38
                  Re: Does respecting mother=Good to wife?

                  Originally posted by Stoic Believer View Post
                  Wow, that is just disrespectful to mothers everywhere.

                  Did my wife carry me in her womb for 9 months? No. My wife will never do a tenth of what my mother did for me. Doesn't matter how long we're married.
                  I agree, that was ignorant.
                  I'm not sure respecting your mother means you'll respect your wife, but to say your wife does more than your mother and that respect to mother means nothing is . . .dumb.

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                  • #39
                    Re: Does respecting mother=Good to wife?

                    Originally posted by Stoic Believer View Post
                    Wow, that is just disrespectful to mothers everywhere.

                    Did my wife carry me in her womb for 9 months? No. My wife will never do a tenth of what my mother did for me. Doesn't matter how long we're married.
                    But lets say you become sick at age 40 and live for the next 30 years sick,your wife takes care of you.

                    my aunt has been taken care of my uncles mom for 20 years now,she has done greater deed in my opinion than his mom

                    every mom will take care of you its basic natural mother instinct,but a good wife is a good wife out of love...not natural instinct

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                    • #40
                      Re: Does respecting mother=Good to wife?

                      Originally posted by The Poet View Post
                      That's ok ukhti, no need to say sorry or apologize.

                      :jkk: for answering and May Allah reward you.
                      Wa iyyaki sis: )
                      Ameen and may Allah bless and reward you too with the best in both worlds : )
                      *"None of you truly believes until he loves for his brother what he loves for himself."* [Al-Bukhari & Muslim]
                      "Mindless are those who only jump when told to jump, cry when told to cry, and laugh when told to laugh. Indeed, they are but sheep." TheStrivingUmmi

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                      • #41
                        Re: Does respecting mother=Good to wife?

                        Originally posted by bosnian_sister View Post
                        But lets say you become sick at age 40 and live for the next 30 years sick,your wife takes care of you.

                        my aunt has been taken care of my uncles mom for 20 years now,she has done greater deed in my opinion than his mom

                        every mom will take care of you its basic natural mother instinct,but a good wife is a good wife out of love...not natural instinct
                        The mother still has a higher rank than the wife.

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                        • #42
                          Re: Does respecting mother=Good to wife?

                          Originally posted by Stoic Believer View Post
                          The mother still has a higher rank than the wife.
                          Of course the mother is higher in rank, Jannah lies at her feet, a man can't raise his voice to her, must obey her, must serve her whilst the wife's place in Jannah depends on how she is with him, she must obey him, she must serve him, if anyone was to prostate to anyone it'd be her to him etc . As one hadith mentions, the person that has most rights over a man is his mother and person who has most rights over a woman is her husband.

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                          • #43
                            Re: Does respecting mother=Good to wife?

                            Originally posted by Khan8 View Post
                            Of course the mother is higher in rank, Jannah lies at her feet, a man can't raise his voice to her, must obey her, must serve her whilst the wife's place in Jannah depends on how she is with him, she must obey him, she must serve him, if anyone was to prostate to anyone it'd be her to him etc . As one hadith mentions, the person that has most rights over a man is his mother and person who has most rights over a woman is her husband.
                            How about my husbands mother who curses Allah? who is trying to manipulate my husband against me and who generally does stuff just because she is jealous my husband has a wife and is not her little kid anymore? my husband if he was just quite he would be like her

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                            • #44
                              Re: Does respecting mother=Good to wife?

                              Originally posted by bosnian_sister View Post
                              How about my husbands mother who curses Allah? who is trying to manipulate my husband against me and who generally does stuff just because she is jealous my husband has a wife and is not her little kid anymore? my husband if he was just quite he would be like her
                              Even if someones mother is a disbeliever he must treat with her respect.

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                              • #45
                                Re: Does respecting mother=Good to wife?

                                Originally posted by Khan8 View Post
                                Even if someones mother is a disbeliever he must treat with her respect.
                                Sure but does not mean you should listen yo anything she says

                                My mother in law made a scene when my parents visited us,she started talking how bad i am and similar things...my husband openly in front of my parents started to argue with her,because she was telling lies about me.was that wrong in your opinion?

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