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Biodata/Marriage CV

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  • #16
    Re: Biodata/Marriage CV

    Originally posted by Sabros View Post
    Can I ask:
    What kind of people does it attract and why are CVs bad?
    People run for superficial things until they see your hijab on your head or the fact that you may not want a 'mixed' wedding (forget a simple one. If I can get a segregated one that will be the achievement of my lifetime in shaa Allah). Hijab is not everything either because there is more to a Muslim. But I remember being frustrated and now I am not bothered about it. I ain't selling my deen. It is hard enough trying to stick to what I already practice on a consistent basis and if I have to compromise, that's a disaster.

    My father got told by all the uncles that I was being 'picky' for wanting someone who prays regularly (I haven't asked for a beard yet with my point being I am only going by priority). They say most guys in 20/30s do not pray, if at all (which I know is not true). I just have not come across those ones yet. And, also I am a minority in my local area which makes it harder.

    CVs are bad because there is no section for deen! (You'd think that's one thing that should be on there but if you put it, you are being 'extreme')


    End of vent.
    Ramadan Ummah Project 2015 in shaa Allah
    http://www.ummah.com/forum/showthrea...h-Project-2015
    Let's learn and live Islam together. Ameen.
    ----------------------- :apple::watermelon::peach:------------------------
    My Lord! bestow on them thy Mercy even as they cherished me in childhood [17:24]

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    • #17
      Re: Biodata/Marriage CV

      Originally posted by Sabros View Post
      Lol agree it sounds a bit of an ordeal.
      Only mediocre men worry about marrying mediocre women bro. :up:

      I mean a marriage cv. Come on.

      If a man wants to go through such embarrassment and sometimes humiliation to marry then surely go ahead. If that man likes going through such procedures then who am I to object.

      Comment


      • #18
        Re: Biodata/Marriage CV

        Originally posted by beng123 View Post
        it is becoming common mainly from the westernized Bengali. .
        Its not westernized Bengali thing. My mom who got married in village of BD in early 80's had biodata too. My grandpa wrote it up.

        Since arrange marriage = 6th degree of connection and there is lot of word of mouth passing around, it is often found that aunties who do match making have bad memories. They often mix basic details such as bride/groom age, name, job, location..etc. Often that leads to confusion. Sometimes a guy might look into a girl only to find out age/family..etc doesn't match. So its better to have it in writing instead of word of mouth.

        Its same as normal CV minus your job history and add persona detail (height, age, family background). People don't marry based on CV, it just initial information same as some friend telling info off top of his/her head

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        • #19
          Re: Biodata/Marriage CV

          Originally posted by Kya View Post
          Its not westernized Bengali thing. My mom who got married in village of BD in early 80's had biodata too. My grandpa wrote it up.

          Since arrange marriage = 6th degree of connection and there is lot of word of mouth passing around, it is often found that aunties who do match making have bad memories. They often mix basic details such as bride/groom age, name, job, location..etc. Often that leads to confusion. Sometimes a guy might look into a girl only to find out age/family..etc doesn't match. So its better to have it in writing instead of word of mouth.

          Its same as normal CV minus your job history and add persona detail (height, age, family background). People don't marry based on CV, it just initial information same as some friend telling info off top of his/her head
          You brought in a good point.

          Also, sometimes you can get the 'Chinese whispers'. Next thing you know the guy is the PM or some sheikh….

          Exaggeration travels faster than words.
          Ramadan Ummah Project 2015 in shaa Allah
          http://www.ummah.com/forum/showthrea...h-Project-2015
          Let's learn and live Islam together. Ameen.
          ----------------------- :apple::watermelon::peach:------------------------
          My Lord! bestow on them thy Mercy even as they cherished me in childhood [17:24]

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          • #20
            Re: Biodata/Marriage CV

            Is that really a thing lol
            unconditional love for all of mankind.

            Comment


            • #21
              Re: Biodata/Marriage CV

              Originally posted by Kya View Post
              Its not westernized Bengali thing. My mom who got married in village of BD in early 80's had biodata too.
              i may be wrong. It the first time iv heard about it wen i had proposals . wen other family member got married i never heard about it. the way they got married either word of mouth thru other family members but they never requested one. it only recent generation i heard about asking for cv.

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              • #22
                Re: Biodata/Marriage CV

                Originally posted by pointless View Post

                Also, sometimes you can get the 'Chinese whispers'. Next thing you know the guy is the PM or some sheikh….

                Exaggeration travels faster than words.
                Yea there are lot of Nurse who become Doctors or mechanics turn into Engineer or guy with $1000 in saving becomes millionaire during the marriage talk, all while bride/groom have no idea how those rumors spread. Even with biodata exaggeration has no end.

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                • #23
                  Re: Biodata/Marriage CV

                  I think biodata just means CV right

                  they have different names for it in different countries

                  in America its resume
                  in the Uk its CV
                  and I think in south asian countries its called a biodata

                  either way yeah very sad, needing a CV for marriage - what?!

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                  • #24
                    Re: Biodata/Marriage CV

                    Lol this reminded me of something. Someone my brother knew was interested in marrying me. He askef for a picture and I sent my brother my work cv which had my pic on it. My intention was that my brother would take the picture and show to the guy but he forwarded the full cv. Lol well it certainly wasnt a marriage cv. Haha

                    Comment


                    • #25
                      Re: Biodata/Marriage CV

                      Originally posted by Kya View Post
                      Yea there are lot of Nurse who become Doctors or mechanics turn into Engineer or guy with $1000 in saving becomes millionaire during the marriage talk, all while bride/groom have no idea how those rumors spread. Even with biodata exaggeration has no end.
                      I have also noticed when one actually holds one of those overrated occupations, people tend to find it hard to believe. Oh, engineer. I see. So, engineer, as in engineer, son?


                      People, why do you love changing the plot?

                      I do not have problem with CV per se because if it is well-written with all the necessary details, it can be very good at filtering.
                      Ramadan Ummah Project 2015 in shaa Allah
                      http://www.ummah.com/forum/showthrea...h-Project-2015
                      Let's learn and live Islam together. Ameen.
                      ----------------------- :apple::watermelon::peach:------------------------
                      My Lord! bestow on them thy Mercy even as they cherished me in childhood [17:24]

                      Comment


                      • #26
                        Re: Biodata/Marriage CV

                        Originally posted by beng123 View Post
                        i may be wrong. It the first time iv heard about it wen i had proposals . wen other family member got married i never heard about it. the way they got married either word of mouth thru other family members but they never requested one. it only recent generation i heard about asking for cv.
                        It always existed. some family didn't have need for it, so never practiced, others have used it for generations. It depends on how far marriage search spreads. My husbands family never had biodata because most of his family married in the same village or with in few mile radius. So word of mouth is enough to recognize family & go from there.

                        My family used biodata during my parents generation & might have used it during my grandparents too. That's because all my relatives are far from eachother (over hr drive). Bring spread out so far, its hard to keep in touch or share basic details of potential bride/groom. Its just easier communicating. Imagine an aunty tells you name of a guy/girl over the phone but you heard it wrong. Now you are asking around town about a girl/guy & can't get any information because you heard it wrong or she gave the wrong name. If you have the biodata, its easy. You can just type it online and get info

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                        • #27
                          Re: Biodata/Marriage CV

                          Originally posted by umm salabil View Post
                          Lol this reminded me of something. Someone my brother knew was interested in marrying me. He askef for a picture and I sent my brother my work cv which had my pic on it. My intention was that my brother would take the picture and show to the guy but he forwarded the full cv. Lol well it certainly wasnt a marriage cv. Haha
                          That's hilarious.

                          So, I am guessing the brother was overthrown by the sheer brilliance of your job history and perhaps, disappointed that none of the kitchen qualifications were there.

                          Conclusion: Not a wife material.
                          Ramadan Ummah Project 2015 in shaa Allah
                          http://www.ummah.com/forum/showthrea...h-Project-2015
                          Let's learn and live Islam together. Ameen.
                          ----------------------- :apple::watermelon::peach:------------------------
                          My Lord! bestow on them thy Mercy even as they cherished me in childhood [17:24]

                          Comment


                          • #28
                            Re: Biodata/Marriage CV

                            i hand write mine with italic font on a scroll for bonus point

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                            • #29
                              Re: Biodata/Marriage CV

                              Originally posted by pointless View Post
                              That's hilarious.

                              So, I am guessing the brother was overthrown by the sheer brilliance of your job history and perhaps, disappointed that none of the kitchen qualifications were there.

                              Conclusion: Not a wife material.
                              Lol my cv isn't that impressive but the guy knew about me pretty much cuz he's known my brother a long time and we knew about each other. He was a recently separated from his wife, hadn't yet finalized divorce, and there were a few things I didn't like about him but he was said to be improving religion-wise. However, he had grown children and in the end decided I was too religious for him.

                              I admit I didn't give him a chance. There were things I didn't like.
                              Last edited by umm salabil; 26-02-15, 10:02 PM.

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                              • #30
                                Re: Biodata/Marriage CV

                                Originally posted by pointless View Post
                                I have also noticed when one actually holds one of those overrated occupations, people tend to find it hard to believe. Oh, engineer. I see. So, engineer, as in engineer, son?


                                People, why do you love changing the plot?

                                I do not have problem with CV per se because if it is well-written with all the necessary details, it can be very good at filtering.
                                Engineer is an overrated occupation?:)

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