Ads by Muslim Ad Network

Announcement

Collapse
No announcement yet.

Bed room sleeping time difficulty with wife

Collapse
X
 
  • Filter
  • Time
  • Show
Clear All
new posts

  • Re: Bed room sleeping time difficulty with wife

    Originally posted by shay5 View Post
    Ukthi ..I hear angel not even visit your home due to impurity for long period of time and yes...you cannot pray...it is like when you have to perform ghusl aftter your period...you cant just have normal shower and pray after period...always ghusl..i am happy uou learn this through another man's misery thread..we all can learn something...

    As for the Hadith related by Sayyiduna Ali (may Allah be pleased with him) that the Messenger of Allah (Allah bless him & give him peace) said, “The angels do not enter a house in which there is a picture, a dog, or a person in a state of major ritual impurity” (Sunan Abi Dawud 229), it refers to an individual who unnecessarily remains in a state of major ritual impurity for a considerable length of time to the extent that the obligatory (fard) prayers are delayed. In such a case, one is sinful; otherwise it is permitted, without dislike, to go to sleep in a state of impurity, even though having a bath is superior.
    SubhanAllah really?!

    So after EVERY occasion you must shower and perform ghusl.

    What about if you have urges during the day or ur husband does? And we have prayers during the day too. What then?
    Must you go and get in the shower every time?

    No wonder some women putt off intercourse if that's a prerequisite after every occasion.

    Comment


    • Re: Bed room sleeping time difficulty with wife

      Originally posted by UmmAbdulMalik View Post
      Wrong.
      Absolutely wrong.


      Wrong on so many levels I can't even begin to explain how wrong your statements are.
      There are women out there who would absolutely love to have a husband who is 'overly nice' 'clingy and loving' and does all the things OP mentioned.
      I know I would. Also because I'd love to feel loved and cherished, and in sha Allah I know I would appreciate it. In fact, one of my fears in marriage is that I'd get too attached and that he'd break my heart or take advantage of my soft nature.
      So men should never stop showing love to their woman! Ever! Unless there's a legimate reason. Women want to be loved and men want to be respected. It's as simple as that.
      It depends entirely on the women and her personal characteristics so don't exaggerate and imply that all women are unappreciative little sods towards their husbands kind behaviour.
      To be honest, this is primarily why I dislike the idea of my husband loving me lesser or being attached to me less than I am to him, simply because I know I'm a deeply attached kind of person.
      It depends on the woman's character, and also her level of deen. A wife should show respect to her husband regardless, because without common respect the marriage is fragile and breakable. You're still two human beings who have needs, emotions etc. You still have to rights upon one another so you have to be able to compromise and respect that. OPs wife has to recognize that and sacrifice her needs for personal space once in a while, saying your just not bothered is not a satisfactory reason.
      In fact I think it's quite demeaning to the man in the relationship.
      At the same time, OP should give her adequate time and space and be responsive to her needs outside of the bedroom.
      Exactly Idk where Brother TazZ is from but here there is a big stereotype that it is women who love cuddling and affection and men are the ones who reluctantly give it lol. Idk I feel bad for OP his wife should give him some love lol
      وَمَا قَدَرُوا اللَّهَ حَقَّ قَدْرِهِ وَالْأَرْضُ جَمِيعًا قَبْضَتُهُ يَوْمَ الْقِيَامَةِ وَالسَّمَاوَاتُ مَطْوِيَّاتٌ بِيَمِينِهِ ۚ سُبْحَانَهُ وَتَعَالَىٰ عَمَّا يُشْرِكُونَ
      They have not appraised Allah with true appraisal, while the earth entirely will be [within] His grip on the Day of Resurrection, and the heavens will be folded in His right hand. Exalted is He and high above what they associate with Him. (Az-Zumar: 67)

      Comment


      • Re: Bed room sleeping time difficulty with wife

        Originally posted by TazZ- View Post
        Absolutely irrelevant.

        Sex is mandatory in marriage. Not to be used as a reward or weapon. This is what you sign up for. Don't like then don't marry . Simples.
        My post is absolutely relevant.

        As users suggested u in this thread before, if you've an issue then open another thread. You're almost spamming this thread with same content.

        Originally posted by UmmAbdulMalik View Post
        Wrong.
        Absolutely wrong.


        Wrong on so many levels I can't even begin to explain how wrong your statements are.
        There are women out there who would absolutely love to have a husband who is 'overly nice' 'clingy and loving' and does all the things OP mentioned.
        I know I would. Also because I'd love to feel loved and cherished, and in sha Allah I know I would appreciate it. In fact, one of my fears in marriage is that I'd get too attached and that he'd break my heart or take advantage of my soft nature.
        So men should never stop showing love to their woman! Ever! Unless there's a legimate reason. Women want to be loved and men want to be respected. It's as simple as that.
        It depends entirely on the women and her personal characteristics so don't exaggerate and imply that all women are unappreciative little sods towards their husbands kind behaviour.
        To be honest, this is primarily why I dislike the idea of my husband loving me lesser or being attached to me less than I am to him, simply because I know I'm a deeply attached kind of person.
        It depends on the woman's character, and also her level of deen. A wife should show respect to her husband regardless, because without common respect the marriage is fragile and breakable. You're still two human beings who have needs, emotions etc. You still have to rights upon one another so you have to be able to compromise and respect that. OPs wife has to recognize that and sacrifice her needs for personal space once in a while, saying your just not bothered is not a satisfactory reason.
        In fact I think it's quite demeaning to the man in the relationship.
        At the same time, OP should give her adequate time and space and be responsive to her needs outside of the bedroom.
        I know. Personally speaking, sometime I think I've spoilt my hubby & he takes everything for granted!

        Originally posted by UmmAbdulMalik View Post
        Btw -
        Do you have to wash, as in shower EVERY time you have intercourse with your husband, like right afterwards?

        That must be quite troublesome. Does that mean you can't pray or read Quran during that period of being impure as well?
        Hmm. I never knew this stuff.

        Isn't it sufficient to just make wudu and cleanse ur private area thoroughly?

        It'd be interesting if someone could clarify.
        If its not the time for prayer then you can delay the ghusl as shay5 mentioned. Suppose brother A may catch cold if he does ghusl at night & he has already prayed isha. Now he can do ghusl before fajr & not miss the prayer. Same rule goes with any other kind of impurity. Main thing is not to miss the prayer due to impurity.

        Originally posted by Abd al-Rahman View Post
        Exactly Idk where Brother TazZ is from but here there is a big stereotype that it is women who love cuddling and affection and men are the ones who reluctantly give it lol. Idk I feel bad for OP his wife should give him some love lol
        Yeah, he should sort his problem before advising others on the matter.
        Last edited by sushi; 12-02-15, 08:00 AM.

        Comment


        • Re: Bed room sleeping time difficulty with wife

          Originally posted by Outreach4Islam View Post
          wa alaykumus salaam,

          women need to feel close to someone before they want to get close to them, men feel close through that physical intimacy, so it could easily just be you need to get close to her emotionally outside the bed before snuggling up in the bed.
          Salaam
          Brother has given the best advice
          you have to close to her emotional before anything else

          Comment


          • Re: Bed room sleeping time difficulty with wife

            Firstly it's not good to discuss your sex life in an open public forum lol it's better to seek private counselling from a marriage expert, it's a serious problem which can potentially ruin your marriage and I personally wouldn't act on people's opinions from these forums, it's just gonna confuse you further and in the worst case, it maybe the worst piece of advice given to you and destroy your marriage, so go seek an expert marriage counsellor, ask at your local mosque if such a service exists. Hope things work out for you.

            Comment

            Working...
            X