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Brothers: Do you care if girls think you're a pervert?

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  • Re: Brothers: Do you care if girls think you're a pervert?

    Originally posted by Mustafa Mahmud View Post
    Any comment should be worded in a way that won't drive Muslims away from Islam. "Have hayah" is not a phrase I ever found among the Sahaba RA and it does not seem to be something that inspires faith rather it seems to be something that turns a Muslim further away from the one giving the advice.

    Whatever ones intentions, the tone is what matters and tone cannot be corrected if the wording isn't corrected.

    فَبِمَا رَحْمَةٍ مِّنَ اللَّهِ لِنتَ لَهُمْ ۖ وَلَوْ كُنتَ فَظًّا غَلِيظَ الْقَلْبِ لَانفَضُّوا مِنْ حَوْلِكَ ۖ فَاعْفُ عَنْهُمْ وَاسْتَغْفِرْ لَهُمْ وَشَاوِرْهُمْ فِي الْأَمْرِ ۖ فَإِذَا عَزَمْتَ فَتَوَكَّلْ عَلَى اللَّهِ ۚ إِنَّ اللَّهَ يُحِبُّ الْمُتَوَكِّلِينَ
    So by mercy from Allah , [O Muhammad], you were lenient with them. And if you had been rude [in speech] and harsh in heart, they would have disbanded from about you. So pardon them and ask forgiveness for them and consult them in the matter. And when you have decided, then rely upon Allah . Indeed, Allah loves those who rely [upon Him].



    A man came to Rasulullah sallahualayhiwasalam asking to commit zina.....and Rasulullah sallahualayhiwasalams response was not "have some hayah". It comes across as incredibly demeaning. It's like "have some decency" or "have some shame".


    Such words do not reach a Muslims heart unless Allah wills. Rather they turn him or her away ila ma shaa Allah.
    You mention the sahabah. When they used to be informed about Allah swt and taqwa their eyes used to fill with tears. Nowadays if something which is beneficial for everyone including myself, people go on the attack.

    on the authority of abu masood uqbah ibn amar al ansaari ra. The prophet saw said "from the words of the previous prophets that the people still find are: if you feel no shame then do as you wish. From bukhari.

    modesty is a branch of eeman and highly valued in islam. I stand by my comments we are all accountable of what we post. If its inappropriate then dont. Hayyah is vital.
    82. Verily, when He intends a thing, His Command is, "be", and it is! 83. So glory to Him in Whose hands is the dominion of all things: and to Him will you be all brought back. Quran surah 36: Ya-sin

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    • Re: Brothers: Do you care if girls think you're a pervert?

      Originally posted by Sis_Asiya View Post
      You mention the sahabah. When they used to be informed about Allah swt and taqwa their eyes used to fill with tears. Nowadays if something which is beneficial for everyone including myself, people go on the attack.

      on the authority of abu masood uqbah ibn amar al ansaari ra. The prophet saw said "from the words of the previous prophets that the people still find are: if you feel no shame then do as you wish. From bukhari.

      modesty is a branch of eeman and highly valued in islam. I stand by my comments we are all accountable of what we post. If its inappropriate then dont. Hayyah is vital.
      "have some hayaah" is not even close to what the Prophet sallahualayhiwasalam said. Have some hayah sounds harsh and rude not like what he said in the above narration.

      When they used to be informed about Allah swt and taqwa their eyes used to fill with tears. Nowadays if something which is beneficial for everyone including myself, people go on the attack.
      Many Muslims say like you do. What they ignore is that saying something beneficial must be said in the right manner, humbly or it will backfire. That's what is ignored. Its not right to take one part of the sunnah(how to take advice) and ignore another(how to give it.)

      Like I said with the example of an-Nabi sallahualayhiwasalam and the man who came to him showing the least hayaah and the hadith you cited doesn't oppose my contention it actually supports it. He's not telling an individual Sahabi "have some hayah" he's making a general statement which is actually the BEST way one can introduce something like hayaah to the Muslims.



      modesty is a branch of eeman and highly valued in islam
      Hayyah is vital
      Which is precisely why calling people to it must be done gently and humbly, following the Sunnah of Rasulullah sallahualayhiwasalam, not the Sunnah we invent.
      Humiliating people in the name of religion is the practice of someone deprived of the first fruit of religion, humility.-Nouman Ali Khan

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      • Re: Brothers: Do you care if girls think you're a pervert?

        "Hayyah is a part of eeman and eeman is in paradise. Lewdness is a part of hardness of heart and hardness of heart is in the fire. Recorded in ahmed.

        recorded in bukhari and muslim: qala rasoolullah sallahu alayhi wa salam:

        Eeman has 70 some odd or 60 some odd branches. The most virtuous of them is the statement "there is none worthy except Allah"and the slightest of them is to remove something harmful from the road. And hayyah is a branch of eeman.

        recorded in ibn majah. Qala rasoolullah sallahu alayhi wa salam "every religion has a manner or characteristic. And the characteristic of islam is hayyah
        82. Verily, when He intends a thing, His Command is, "be", and it is! 83. So glory to Him in Whose hands is the dominion of all things: and to Him will you be all brought back. Quran surah 36: Ya-sin

        Comment


        • Re: Brothers: Do you care if girls think you're a pervert?

          Originally posted by Sis_Asiya View Post
          "Hayyah is a part of eeman and eeman is in paradise. Lewdness is a part of hardness of heart and hardness of heart is in the fire. Recorded in ahmed.

          recorded in bukhari and muslim: qala rasoolullah sallahu alayhi wa salam:

          Eeman has 70 some odd or 60 some odd branches. The most virtuous of them is the statement "there is none worthy except Allah"and the slightest of them is to remove something harmful from the road. And hayyah is a branch of eeman.

          recorded in ibn majah. Qala rasoolullah sallahu alayhi wa salam "every religion has a manner or characteristic. And the characteristic of islam is hayyah
          +1
          Humiliating people in the name of religion is the practice of someone deprived of the first fruit of religion, humility.-Nouman Ali Khan

          Comment


          • Re: Brothers: Do you care if girls think you're a pervert?

            Originally posted by Mustafa Mahmud View Post
            "have some hayaah" is not even close to what the Prophet sallahualayhiwasalam said. Have some hayah sounds harsh and rude not like what he said in the above narration.



            Many Muslims say like you do. What they ignore is that saying something beneficial must be said in the right manner, humbly or it will backfire. That's what is ignored. Its not right to take one part of the sunnah(how to take advice) and ignore another(how to give it.)

            Like I said with the example of an-Nabi sallahualayhiwasalam and the man who came to him showing the least hayaah and the hadith you cited doesn't oppose my contention it actually supports it. He's not telling an individual Sahabi "have some hayah" he's making a general statement which is actually the BEST way one can introduce something like hayaah to the Muslims.




            Which is precisely why calling people to it must be done gently and humbly, following the Sunnah of Rasulullah sallahualayhiwasalam, not the Sunnah we invent.
            brother you stated earlier that the comment was worded arrogantly. Thats not humble or kind wording. Infact that is slander. You are not privy to my intention and the way in which my intention for the comment which was actually general. If my comment was something you took offence to perhaps it is something you personally have an issue with as no one else raised it. I am not creating a sunnah subhan Allah.
            82. Verily, when He intends a thing, His Command is, "be", and it is! 83. So glory to Him in Whose hands is the dominion of all things: and to Him will you be all brought back. Quran surah 36: Ya-sin

            Comment


            • Re: Brothers: Do you care if girls think you're a pervert?

              Originally posted by Sis_Asiya View Post
              brother you stated earlier that the comment was worded arrogantly. Thats not humble or kind wording. Infact that is slander. You are not privy to my intention and the way in which my intended which was actually general. If my comment was something you took offence to perhaps it is something you personally have an issue with as no one else raised it. I am not creating a sunnah subhan Allah.
              Again, I didn't question your intention in the slightest. I said that phrase comes across as arrogant and harsh. Not that the person giving it is. A lot of things people say(including me of course) come across differently then intended.

              So I haven't slandered you in the slightest.

              One sunnah some Muslims have invented these days is inventing our own way of correcting others. That comment didn't mention anyone specifically.
              Humiliating people in the name of religion is the practice of someone deprived of the first fruit of religion, humility.-Nouman Ali Khan

              Comment


              • Re: Brothers: Do you care if girls think you're a pervert?

                Originally posted by Mustafa Mahmud View Post
                Again, I didn't question your intention in the slightest. I said that phrase comes across as arrogant and harsh. Not that the person giving it is. A lot of things people say(including me of course) come across differently then intended.

                So I haven't slandered you in the slightest.

                One sunnah some Muslims have invented these days is inventing our own way of correcting others. That comment didn't mention anyone

                specifically.

                Subhan Allah. Again the comment was general. No one else raised it apart from you but alhumdulillah. If it comes across to yourself as arrogant what can I say? I have posted an ayah and a few hadith. Personally I think anything beneficial relating to deen is excellent and is a good point to reflect upon. Khayr.
                82. Verily, when He intends a thing, His Command is, "be", and it is! 83. So glory to Him in Whose hands is the dominion of all things: and to Him will you be all brought back. Quran surah 36: Ya-sin

                Comment


                • Re: Brothers: Do you care if girls think you're a pervert?

                  Originally posted by Sis_Asiya View Post
                  Subhan Allah. Again the comment was general. No one else raised it apart from you but alhumdulillah. If it comes across to yourself as arrogant what can I say? I have posted an ayah and a few hadith. Personally I think anything beneficial relating to deen is excellent and is a good point to reflect upon. Khayr.
                  Well yes....nobody will raise any issue for discussion until the first person to do so...does so.
                  Humiliating people in the name of religion is the practice of someone deprived of the first fruit of religion, humility.-Nouman Ali Khan

                  Comment


                  • Re: Brothers: Do you care if girls think you're a pervert?

                    Originally posted by Mustafa Mahmud View Post
                    Well yes....nobody will raise any issue for discussion until the first person to do so...does so.
                    Allahu akbar. I am out of this discussion with yourself. It does not benefit me. As salaamu alaykum.
                    82. Verily, when He intends a thing, His Command is, "be", and it is! 83. So glory to Him in Whose hands is the dominion of all things: and to Him will you be all brought back. Quran surah 36: Ya-sin

                    Comment


                    • Re: Brothers: Do you care if girls think you're a pervert?

                      Originally posted by Sis_Asiya View Post
                      Allahu akbar. I am out of this discussion with yourself. It does not benefit me. As salaamu alaykum.
                      I was just responding to your last comment.
                      Wa alaykumusalam wa rahmatullahi wa barakatuh
                      Humiliating people in the name of religion is the practice of someone deprived of the first fruit of religion, humility.-Nouman Ali Khan

                      Comment


                      • Re: Brothers: Do you care if girls think you're a pervert?

                        Do you care if girls think you're a pervert?

                        A muslim man should care about how behaves in the sight of Allah. It is important for a muslim man that he carries himself in a dignified manner, with haya before Allah at all times and circumstances. Didn't Allah say:

                        يَعْلَمُ خَائِنَةَ الْأَعْيُنِ وَمَا تُخْفِي الصُّدُورُ
                        He knows that which deceives the eyes and what the breasts conceal. [The Noble Quran 40:19]

                        Comment


                        • Re: Brothers: Do you care if girls think you're a pervert?

                          Originally posted by Fragile View Post
                          Don't tell me what to keep to my self!!! i am entitled to share my views, you dislike it then do not read it...
                          Did you read what I wrote before you went Hate mongering on the Sunnah?

                          a Muslim cannot Hate any aspect of the Sunnah, or any Ayaat of the Quran

                          if you don't like something thats your opinion and it's irrelevant to be honest, just keep it to yourself.

                          :jkk:
                          http://www.ilovepalestine.com/campai...imesinGaza.gif

                          "It does not befit the lion to answer the dogs."

                          – Imam al-Shafi’i (Rahimahullah)

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                          • Re: Brothers: Do you care if girls think you're a pervert?

                            Yes I do care if girls think I'm a pervert, because it encourages the stereotype that all men are perverts

                            Comment


                            • Brothers: Do you care if girls think you're a pervert?

                              How would you feel if you see a man that when you come by he lowers hes gaze, which is usually upwards. And you come across this man veryoften for example in college.
                              [SIZE=3][FONT=Times New Roman][B][U][CENTER]Oh Allah, in your name, I die and live.[/CENTER][/U][/B][/FONT][/SIZE]
                              [CENTER]:):lailah::lailah::lailah::lailah::)[/CENTER]

                              [B][CENTER]Ya Allah, Grant Me A Heart That Sees[/CENTER][/B]

                              Comment


                              • Re: Brothers: Do you care if girls think you're a pervert?

                                Originally posted by Talwaar View Post
                                Also what if girls perv over you?
                                Good Point

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