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"Yes, He is Our Husband"- A Second Wife

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  • #76
    Re: "Yes, He is Our Husband"- A Second Wife

    Originally posted by Rebel101 View Post
    what does 'public property' mean? And a quick google search for female vs male ratio in USA refutes the statistics he claims. Also there is an option of remaining single? I know many that prefer that to polygamy.
    I heard this argument years ago and on closer examination , it is full of logical fallacies. Looks like Dr.zakir naik didn't do his research properly.



    "Public property" , how can he use such words...... It's like you either be part of polygamous marriage or be a prostitute... Lol....

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    • #77
      Re: "Yes, He is Our Husband"- A Second Wife

      Originally posted by TazZ- View Post
      I heard this argument years ago and on closer examination , it is full of logical fallacies. Looks like Dr.zakir naik didn't do his research properly.



      "Public property" , how can he use such words...... It's like you either be part of polygamous marriage or be a prostitute... Lol....
      Its the whole take it to the extreme to make a point act. Lol, I use it sometimes, but using it in deen matters is the fastest way to get refuted and lack credibility.
      Gone with the wind.

      Comment


      • #78
        Re: "Yes, He is Our Husband"- A Second Wife

        Originally posted by Rebel101 View Post
        Some people who have no need for marriage are encouraged to stay single by ulema. As well as those who for some reason or another can't make good spouses. So staying single is an option, a more realistic and less extreme option than being 'public property' .. Also not everyone is destined to be married in this dunya so to make it seem that our options are: polygamy or public property is not correct.
        Yes, what I said in my post was those who can/are able to get married, should. There are exceptions.

        Originally posted by Rebel101 View Post
        what does 'public property' mean? And a quick google search for female vs male ratio in USA refutes the statistics he claims. Also there is an option of remaining single? I know many that prefer that to polygamy.
        The higher female to male ratio is among the signs that we'll see as we approach the Day of Judgment. So, we might not see this in the statistics now, but it could be like this in other countries, and it will definitely happen in the future.

        I only cited Dr. Zakir Naik because he is a scholar, at least more than any of us, I think.
        Last edited by starrynight11; 17-11-14, 09:44 AM.
        Life's actually pretty simple: you just have to enjoy it, pray, do good, refrain from bad, and respect others. Being Muslim is not a disadvantage or an advantage - it's a responsibility.
        "So patiently persevere: for verily the promise of Allah is true" (Qur'an, Surah Ar-Rum - 30:60)

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        • #79
          Re: "Yes, He is Our Husband"- A Second Wife

          Salam

          Great to read such positive out comes, that's how my dads wives were like years ago, now all are busy with their offsprings...
          Polygamy works in many ways, we just need to remove the greed and jealousy from our hearts, follow the sunnah and remember all that Allah has asked us to do is for our benefit, sometimes we hate what is good for us and love what is harmful.
          The men in my family that married more than one, their wives always took care of their beauty and were always bubbly and secure, on the other hand the the men who stuck to one, their wife's were neglectful in appearance and not so bubbly. I think 1 woman to 1 man is too much work, I have an enormous family but I remember their was a difference that was clear, I'm not saying all other families are like that, I'm talking about my OWN family experiences.

          Good thread.

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          • #80
            Re: "Yes, He is Our Husband"- A Second Wife

            Originally posted by starrynight11 View Post
            Yes, what I said in my post was those who can/are able to get married, should. There are exceptions.



            The higher female to male ratio is among the signs that we'll see as we approach the Day of Judgment. So, we might not see this in the statistics now, but it could be like this in other countries, and it will definitely happen in the future.

            I only cited Dr. Zakir Naik because he is a scholar, at least more than any of us, I think.
            The article is stating current female vs male ratio in united states of America which happens to be false according to various reliable world data sites. He is not claiming these ratios are what may occur in the future, like you have said. I'm also not challenging his deen knowledge but his statistics and justification for polygamy, which I still believe lacks credibility, being a scholar in deen will not make his statistics or justification anymore creditable because he is no longer discussing the deen but the reasons for polygamy according to his theory and like all theories, criticism is necessary.
            Last edited by Rebel101; 17-11-14, 10:50 AM.
            Gone with the wind.

            Comment


            • #81
              Re: "Yes, He is Our Husband"- A Second Wife

              Originally posted by Rebel101 View Post
              what does 'public property' mean? And a quick google search for female vs male ratio in USA refutes the statistics he claims. Also there is an option of remaining single? I know many that prefer that to polygamy.
              Public property doesn't mean prostitution directly, no. He means you're open to be preyed upon basically as opposed to being married and having a guardian for protection etc.

              His stats may be off or whatever, but the basis of what he's saying is that in the forthcoming years the ratio of women to men will increase hugely - so polygamy may become a necessity. You may choose to remain single, but during times when holding onto imaan will be comparable to holding onto hot coals amongst several other fitna that will befall on this dunya, I'd rather have a good companion than remain single - that's just me though.

              Again, each to their own, in theory we all have opinions, but we'll see what happens when the time actually comes :\
              My Lord sanctify my flawed heart
              As You have sanctified Your house,
              Make my heart as protected and as honoured
              In which permission of entry
              Is only granted to a few,
              Please Allah, allow my heart
              To be preserved only for You.



              ---


              It hurts, to watch you leave so soon,
              when I don't know, if I will ever see you again
              In Jannah, we will meet :love:


              If I have ever offended, hurt or insulted you, forgive me for the sake of Allah سبحانه وتعالى‎

              Comment


              • #82
                Re: "Yes, He is Our Husband"- A Second Wife

                If you guys don't mind Id prefer if we didn't argue about this as I said in the OP. I just wanted to share the story. :p
                [SIZE=4][COLOR="#FF0000"][FONT=Book Antiqua][CENTER][B][URL="http://www.ummah.com/forum/showthread.php?459504-Immensely-rewarding-dhikr!!!&highlight="]IMMENSELY REWARDING DHIKR!!![/URL][/B][/CENTER][/FONT][/COLOR][/SIZE]

                [FONT=Book Antiqua][SIZE=4][COLOR="#2F4F4F"][CENTER]Before you post, think..."Will this help me when I stand before Allah?" If it doesn't, then you're wasting time....[/CENTER][/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT]

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                • #83
                  Re: "Yes, He is Our Husband"- A Second Wife

                  Originally posted by sunrise867 View Post
                  Public property doesn't mean prostitution directly, no. He means you're open to be preyed upon basically as opposed to being married and having a guardian for protection etc.

                  His stats may be off or whatever, but the basis of what he's saying is that in the forthcoming years the ratio of women to men will increase hugely - so polygamy may become a necessity. You may choose to remain single, but during times when holding onto imaan will be comparable to holding onto hot coals amongst several other fitna that will befall on this dunya, I'd rather have a good companion than remain single - that's just me though.

                  Again, each to their own, in theory we all have opinions, but we'll see what happens when the time actually comes :\
                  :jkk:
                  Gone with the wind.

                  Comment


                  • #84
                    Re: "Yes, He is Our Husband"- A Second Wife

                    I didn't read any of this.

                    But I know it's terrible and toally condescending to those women who choose not to engage in this.

                    It's not for everyone... so Ummah forums, please... get over it?

                    Comment


                    • #85
                      Re: "Yes, He is Our Husband"- A Second Wife

                      Originally posted by In my Opinion View Post
                      I didn't read any of this.

                      But I know it's terrible and toally condescending to those women who choose not to engage in this.

                      It's not for everyone... so Ummah forums, please... get over it?
                      uh. So skipping over the entire OP, including the underlined first sentence, and commenting on it anyway is better behavior?
                      I know that there are a lot of rubbish threads, but at least skim it. This thread is (or could have been) like, say, a hijama thread, or homeschooling thread. Not everyone does either of those things either, but there's nothing wrong with sharing nice stories about it.

                      Comment


                      • #86
                        Re: "Yes, He is Our Husband"- A Second Wife

                        Originally posted by Hannahk92 View Post
                        He did nothing of the sort. If you don't like it, than leave it.
                        Actually he did. As far as he is concerned every woman will be a co-wife in Jannah, so we might as well learn to deal with it.

                        Comment


                        • #87
                          Re: "Yes, He is Our Husband"- A Second Wife

                          Originally posted by Saif-Uddin View Post
                          Robot?

                          rather derogatory atitude towards sisters who are pro poliginy,

                          Nauzubillah min zaliq
                          Portraying a woman as if she does not experience real emotion is portraying her as a robot.

                          I've never met any of these robots. Just heard about them in threads like this. Must be because they don't actually exist.

                          Comment


                          • #88
                            Re: "Yes, He is Our Husband"- A Second Wife

                            Originally posted by |Abdur Raheem| View Post
                            Reminding you that speaking once again that speaking to your fellow Muslim in a sarcastic harsh tone like this can be held against you on the Day of Judgement. Especially after accusing me of something I didn't do.

                            I don't want to argue about this. Please read what I said in the first line of the OP before I posted the story.

                            :salams
                            Just because you slam an 'ukhti' at the end of what you say, does not excuse the fact that you obviously have little regard for the trials and tribulations a woman encounters in polygamy. You have shrugged this off on more than one occasion, in preference of this most unlikely story. This story gives nothing of the first wife's inner struggles and just because she is trying to do what she sees as right, her actual pain is forgotten and ignored.

                            No wonder women in polygamy make noise.

                            Comment


                            • #89
                              Re: "Yes, He is Our Husband"- A Second Wife

                              Originally posted by one_justice View Post
                              Just because you slam an 'ukhti' at the end of what you say, does not excuse the fact that you obviously have little regard for the trials and tribulations a woman encounters in polygamy. You have shrugged this off on more than one occasion, in preference of this most unlikely story. This story gives nothing of the first wife's inner struggles and just because she is trying to do what she sees as right, her actual pain is forgotten and ignored.

                              No wonder women in polygamy make noise.
                              Maybe the first wife didn't talk about her inner struggles to seem like a better wife

                              Comment


                              • #90
                                Re: "Yes, He is Our Husband"- A Second Wife

                                Originally posted by noobz View Post
                                actually it does , firstly its not a fact , unlike monogamist marriages , u have no data to support ur claims other than what we hear u say as ur 'experiences'.

                                secondly theres also the story of how a man who was poor and he came to Muhammad(sws) and he(sws) told him to get married again , until his situation became better... so u saying polygamy makes marriages miserable is also another contradictory thing.

                                Polygamy can be misused , monogamy can be misused , we should outlaw marriages as a whole then?
                                I'm sure there is data that supports such things in Muslim countries, where polygamous marriages are not the shady endeavors they are in the West. I will look for some when I have time later on today.

                                If you are going to quote the hadith, please quote the hadith.

                                Polygamy is a more misused form of marriage. Nobody but you talked about outlawing anything.

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