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  • More practising spouse?

    :salams

    If a woman is considering a less practicing spouse (yet practicing just a lesser degree than herself), would this interfere with his authority in the home, how can she avoid those conflicts?. And, how can she skillfully keep her children on track when their father isn't fully obedient, what ways are possible, assuming that she wants this marriage to work for a number of other positive reasons.

    :jazak:
    [CENTER][COLOR="#cc3366"]I asked Allah’s Messenger ṣallallāhu 'alayhi wa sallam (peace and blessings of Allāh be upon him) which deed was best.”
    He (the Holy Prophet) replied: “The prayer at its appointed hour”[/COLOR]. [Sahih Muslim][/CENTER]

  • #2
    Re: More practising spouse?

    Wa alaikum salam wr wb

    It would depend on how practising they are. At least the fardh duties should be adhered to.
    “Mix with the noble people, you become one of them; and keep away from evil people so that you protect yourself from their evils.”


    Hadhrat Ali (Radiallahu anhu)

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    • #3
      Re: More practising spouse?

      Originally posted by serenemuslimah View Post
      :salams

      If a woman is considering a less practicing spouse (yet practicing just a lesser degree than herself), would this interfere with his authority in the home, how can she avoid those conflicts?. And, how can she skillfully keep her children on track when their father isn't fully obedient, what ways are possible, assuming that she wants this marriage to work for a number of other positive reasons.

      :jazak:
      Define less practicing. Does this mean he drinks, gambles? Or does this mean he doesn't pray or fast Ramadan?
      "When a man sees the road as long he weakens in his walk." Ibn Qayyim

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      • #4
        Re: More practising spouse?

        If the spouse is drinking, gambling, etc then you want to stay away, if he's at least praying (fradh), fasting and has good character then it won't be as bad he could become better you never know. My dad doesn't pray as much and barely fasts (due to a bad smoking habit), I think my mom did a good job in raising us.

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        • #5
          Re: More practising spouse?

          Originally posted by Winter View Post
          If the spouse is drinking, gambling, etc then you want to stay away, if he's at least praying (fradh), fasting and has good character then it won't be as bad he could become better you never know. My dad doesn't pray as much and barely fasts (due to a bad smoking habit), I think my mom did a good job in raising us.
          Ive noticed that in a lot of familes, the mother is more religious than the father, applies in my own aswell.
          :sub: wabihamdihi:sub:hiladheem

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          • #6
            More practising spouse?

            Depends on the dynamics of the family. If she's a stay at home housewife and he's out earning the readies then he's gotta be worldly wise as well as of the deen. She can then be as religious as she wants. He's still gotta do the faraz though.

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            • #7
              Re: More practising spouse?

              Originally posted by rainbow*~ View Post
              Ive noticed that in a lot of familes, the mother is more religious than the father, applies in my own aswell.
              All tho not a excuse, but its cause the guys are more lazy after doing a 8 hour shift coming home they just either watch tv, take a nap, etc and there deen just goes down from there, but yeah about 90% of the female in my house are more religious then their husbands.

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              • #8
                Originally posted by rainbow*~ View Post
                Ive noticed that in a lot of familes, the mother is more religious than the father, applies in my own aswell.
                You have a point actually, in the majority of couples that I know the wife is way more practising than her husband. I wonder why that is?

                Regarding OP's question: seeing as mothers will (most likely) always have more of an influence in their children's lives than the father, if the mother is practising then I guess it doesn't matter as much if the father isn't. However of course it's best if both parents are on the same wavelength.
                اللهُمَّ أَعِزَّ الإِسْلامَ وَالمُسْلِمِينَ

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                • #9
                  Originally posted by The Awakening View Post

                  You have a point actually, in the majority of couples that I know the wife is way more practising than her husband. I wonder why that is?
                  How do you measure their level of practising? How many times they go to the mosque?

                  Remember, you don't know what's inside the hearts of those men in your sample. They may appear less practising to you but Allah knows what each person is going through. Anyway there's that hadeeth of more women being in hell than men..

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                  • #10
                    More practising spouse?

                    There could be problems.
                    example, Father wants to buy TV but Mother is against it.
                    نحن قوما اعزنا الله بالإسلام فإن ابتغينا عزة بغيره أذلنا الله

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                    • #11
                      Re: More practising spouse?

                      Salams

                      I know that there are some women MashaAllah Hafeeza, Alima, Islamic lectureres but the sister is not any of these. She is more simple and tries her best for both worlds and is tested like everyone else but she does love Islam and tries to practice the fard in prayer, food, earnings, dress etc. However, the brother does neglect the prayer and seems uncomfortable with dressing properly at first example. In fact, he wasn't even aware that males have a dress code. Anyway, after it was explained to him, he now recognizes the importance of Salaah but seems uncertain in changing his stance with dress. He was the one who pointed out that she seems to be at a higher level. This is what was meant by her being more practicing.

                      What makes the sister want to try with this brother is that he is willing to listen to what she has to explain to him and it could be he has lacked knowledge. Yet, none knows the hearts of others. Some people change for the better, others for the worse.

                      Can you make duas,.if this is good for them both that it happens. JazaakAllahu khair.
                      [CENTER][COLOR="#cc3366"]I asked Allah’s Messenger ṣallallāhu 'alayhi wa sallam (peace and blessings of Allāh be upon him) which deed was best.”
                      He (the Holy Prophet) replied: “The prayer at its appointed hour”[/COLOR]. [Sahih Muslim][/CENTER]

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                      • #12
                        Re: More practising spouse?

                        Originally posted by Imaam View Post
                        Anyway there's that hadeeth of more women being in hell than men..
                        yes but there is also that hadeeth of women ounumbers man (at the end of the world)

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                        • #13
                          Re: More practising spouse?

                          Originally posted by Imaam View Post
                          How do you measure their level of practising? How many times they go to the mosque?

                          Remember, you don't know what's inside the hearts of those men in your sample. They may appear less practising to you but Allah knows what each person is going through. Anyway there's that hadeeth of more women being in hell than men..
                          There are different reasons for that , do not think this thread is about that.

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                          • #14
                            Re: More practising spouse?

                            Originally posted by jasmin333 View Post
                            yes but there is also that hadeeth of women ounumbers man (at the end of the world)
                            So at the end of the world there would be more hell-doomed women that hell-doomed men :)

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                            • #15
                              Re: More practising spouse?

                              Originally posted by Imaam View Post
                              So at the end of the world there would be more hell-doomed women that hell-doomed men :)
                              i guess so....:(
                              i was just talking about the proportion not of the actually numbers. I don't know about the hadeeth.

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