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  • #61
    Re: divorce in islam vs west

    Originally posted by Grimmjow View Post
    A lot of ignorant comments here.

    A lot of you aren't even married or experienced life yet. I don't think you can have an educated discussion about it. Once you get married, go tell her and her wali you want only a nikah because you don't want her to drain your assets after divorce. If he still agrees to marry his daughter to you, then good luck.
    Could you please tell me which comments were ignorant please......

    Of course people are going to talk about divorce and issues similar to it given how high the rates of divorce are nowadays, its unreal.

    Comment


    • #62
      Re: divorce in islam vs west

      Originally posted by n0.n4m3 View Post
      Womena are not the only ones who give committment in marriage. He should support his flesh and blood. Not some gold digger who wants his blood.
      if you bothered to read properly you will see (thats if you can get past your attitude) taht i have actually said that i dont understand why he shoudl support her after marriage BUT some women give up their career to further teh careers of their husband. That is a sacrifice

      and stop referring to your sisters in islam as gold diggers.
      no one marries to get divorced


      and another thing brothers.
      before i married one of the things i dreaded was marrying a cold hearted person with no comapssion. Alas i was tested by none other then a man who had little compassion

      please stop going on about marrying gold diggers. who knows what test allah will thrown in your face
      Last edited by Muslima London; 05-09-14, 01:22 AM.
      Ibnul Qayyim رحمه الله said: "Donít ruin your happiness with worry, and donít ruin your mind with pessimism. Donít ruin your success with deception and donít ruin the optimism of others by destroying it. Donít ruin your day by looking back at yesterday.
      __________________________________________________ _____________________________
      If you think about your situation, you will find that Allaah (سبحانه وتعالى) has given you things without asking, so have trust in Allaah (سبحانه وتعالى) that He doesnít prevent anything you want except there is goodness for you.

      You could be sleeping and the doors of the heavens are being opened with duaías being made on your behalf, SubhanAllaah: perhaps from someone poor whom you helped, or someone sad whom you brought joy, or someone passing by and you smiled at him, or someone in distress and you removed it.. so donít ever underestimate any good deeds."



      please donate to the Ummah forum sadaqa jariya project. Click on the link for for more information, and to make a donation- https://www.justgiving.com/sadaqah-jariyah-project/

      Comment


      • #63
        Re: divorce in islam vs west

        Originally posted by Muslima London View Post
        you have a lot to learn about life

        so much

        - wife doesn have to work. but some muslim wife's DO work

        - kids go to the father. some fathers dont wnat teh kids, and in this country the shariah council will not enforce that. i have spoken to them about it becasue tbh that is one thing taht i would ahve found very hard to do. give the children up to their father

        - some mothers are better islamic role modesls for teh children then the fathers islamically it would be best for the kids to stay with the mother

        you are looking at life through lens which are black and white but life is not just black and white, there are many shades in between.
        Well I need someone to quote me on this matter concerning women working when there husband is providing for them, Children need mother more when they are young but when kids reach the age of 10 the son should go to the father and daughter stays with the mum.

        Comment


        • #64
          Re: divorce in islam vs west

          Originally posted by Muslima London View Post
          if you bothered to read properly you will see (thats if you can get past your attitude) taht i have actually said that i dont understand why he shoudl support her after marriage BUT some women give up their career to further teh careers of their husband. That is a sacrifice

          and stop referring to your sisters in islam as gold diggers.
          no one marries to get divorced
          But some people do marry for money and then divorce to get that money.

          Comment


          • #65
            Re: divorce in islam vs west

            Originally posted by xFedal View Post
            But some people do marry for money and then divorce to get that money.
            subhanallah
            do you think these are women who are pracising muslims????

            perhaps you should be conscoius of what kind of woman you marry. prob with men is they are swayed with beauty adn lust so much that sometimes they fail to exercise common sense when marrying
            Ibnul Qayyim رحمه الله said: "Donít ruin your happiness with worry, and donít ruin your mind with pessimism. Donít ruin your success with deception and donít ruin the optimism of others by destroying it. Donít ruin your day by looking back at yesterday.
            __________________________________________________ _____________________________
            If you think about your situation, you will find that Allaah (سبحانه وتعالى) has given you things without asking, so have trust in Allaah (سبحانه وتعالى) that He doesnít prevent anything you want except there is goodness for you.

            You could be sleeping and the doors of the heavens are being opened with duaías being made on your behalf, SubhanAllaah: perhaps from someone poor whom you helped, or someone sad whom you brought joy, or someone passing by and you smiled at him, or someone in distress and you removed it.. so donít ever underestimate any good deeds."



            please donate to the Ummah forum sadaqa jariya project. Click on the link for for more information, and to make a donation- https://www.justgiving.com/sadaqah-jariyah-project/

            Comment


            • #66
              Re: divorce in islam vs west

              Originally posted by Muslima London View Post
              if you bothered to read properly you will see (thats if you can get past your attitude) taht i have actually said that i dont understand why he shoudl support her after marriage BUT some women give up their career to further teh careers of their husband. That is a sacrifice

              and stop referring to your sisters in islam as gold diggers.
              no one marries to get divorced


              and another thing brothers.
              before i married one of the things i dreaded was marrying a cold hearted person with no comapssion. Alas i was tested by none other then a man who had little compassion

              please stop going on about marrying gold diggers. who knows what test allah will thrown in your face
              Women are not providers in marriage Islamically and they are the ones that need to stay at home and raise the children that's the islamic way,The western way is for the women to work as well.

              Comment


              • #67
                Re: divorce in islam vs west

                Originally posted by Muslima London View Post
                if you bothered to read properly you will see (thats if you can get past your attitude) taht i have actually said that i dont understand why he shoudl support her after marriage BUT some women give up their career to further teh careers of their husband. That is a sacrifice

                and stop referring to your sisters in islam as gold diggers.
                no one marries to get divorced


                and another thing brothers.
                before i married one of the things i dreaded was marrying a cold hearted person with no comapssion. Alas i was tested by none other then a man who had little compassion

                please stop going on about marrying gold diggers. who knows what test allah will thrown in your face
                you're right in saying that in the west there is no sharia so if i don't follow the islamic law after divorce, you can get screwed...so i guess in a way you're just looking after ur well being in case of divorce, which is totally fine

                Comment


                • #68
                  Re: divorce in islam vs west

                  Originally posted by Muslima London View Post
                  subhanallah
                  do you think these are women who are pracising muslims????

                  perhaps you should be conscoius of what kind of woman you marry. prob with men is they are swayed with beauty adn lust so much that sometimes they fail to exercise common sense when marrying
                  Yes this is true for some men they easily get deceived and manipulated. Yes pracsising muslims like I mentioned earlier my cousins wife was practising she even used to wake my cousin up for fajr and all the prayers they read together, I don't where all that compassion went when she took him to the cleaners. ARGHH it's disgusting and mind boggling.

                  Comment


                  • #69
                    Originally posted by Muslima London View Post
                    Originally posted by n0.n4m3 View Post
                    Womena are not the only ones who give committment in marriage. He should support his flesh and blood. Not some gold digger who wants his blood.
                    if you bothered to read properly you will see (thats if you can get past your attitude) taht i have actually said that i dont understand why he shoudl support her after marriage BUT some women give up their career to further teh careers of their husband. That is a sacrifice

                    and stop referring to your sisters in islam as gold diggers.
                    no one marries to get divorced


                    and another thing brothers.
                    before i married one of the things i dreaded was marrying a cold hearted person with no comapssion. Alas i was tested by none other then a man who had little compassion

                    please stop going on about marrying gold diggers. who knows what test allah will thrown in your face
                    Youre post was depicting men as cash machines.
                    Men also make sacrifices in marriage. They arent just cash machines for the house you know

                    Justice will be brought against oppressors by Allah.
                    نحن قوما اعزنا الله بالإسلام فإن ابتغينا عزة بغيره أذلنا الله

                    Comment


                    • #70
                      Re: divorce in islam vs west

                      Originally posted by xFedal View Post
                      Women are not providers in marriage Islamically and they are the ones that need to stay at home and raise the children that's the islamic way,The western way is for the women to work as well.
                      i am aware of that BUT t hey aer usually the breadwinners WHEN and IF they marry a man from back home

                      lsiten dont try and educate me on things that i know already
                      I've lived life a few more years then you, yoiu know.

                      i'm off to bed.

                      you hang around wtih your felllow anti-golld digger protection buddy
                      sometimes i despair at the state of the muslims. to accuse muslim sistesr of being gold diggers jeez - like your sisters in islam are no better then kaffir women. its disgusting


                      and as for this unhealthy interest in divorce at this age. why dont you address the issue with Abu Musab in his next Q&A
                      Ibnul Qayyim رحمه الله said: "Donít ruin your happiness with worry, and donít ruin your mind with pessimism. Donít ruin your success with deception and donít ruin the optimism of others by destroying it. Donít ruin your day by looking back at yesterday.
                      __________________________________________________ _____________________________
                      If you think about your situation, you will find that Allaah (سبحانه وتعالى) has given you things without asking, so have trust in Allaah (سبحانه وتعالى) that He doesnít prevent anything you want except there is goodness for you.

                      You could be sleeping and the doors of the heavens are being opened with duaías being made on your behalf, SubhanAllaah: perhaps from someone poor whom you helped, or someone sad whom you brought joy, or someone passing by and you smiled at him, or someone in distress and you removed it.. so donít ever underestimate any good deeds."



                      please donate to the Ummah forum sadaqa jariya project. Click on the link for for more information, and to make a donation- https://www.justgiving.com/sadaqah-jariyah-project/

                      Comment


                      • #71
                        Re: divorce in islam vs west

                        Originally posted by Muslima London View Post
                        i am aware of that BUT t hey aer usually the breadwinners WHEN and IF they marry a man from back home

                        lsiten dont try and educate me on things that i know already
                        I've lived life a few more years then you, yoiu know.

                        i'm off to bed.

                        you hang around wtih your felllow anti-golld digger protection buddy
                        sometimes i despair at the state of the muslims. to accuse muslim sistesr of being gold diggers jeez - like your sisters in islam are no better then kaffir women. its disgusting


                        and as for this unhealthy interest in divorce at this age. why dont you address the issue with Abu Musab in his next Q&A
                        won't really reply to this will go back to what we already spoke about and okay bye.

                        Comment


                        • #72
                          Re: divorce in islam vs west

                          Originally posted by n0.n4m3 View Post
                          Youre post was depicting men as cash machines.
                          Men also make sacrifices in marriage. They arent just cash machines for the house you know

                          Justice will be brought against oppressors by Allah
                          .
                          oppressors!!!!

                          seroiusly,

                          think whatever you want. your the one wallowing in your ignorance - not me
                          Ibnul Qayyim رحمه الله said: "Donít ruin your happiness with worry, and donít ruin your mind with pessimism. Donít ruin your success with deception and donít ruin the optimism of others by destroying it. Donít ruin your day by looking back at yesterday.
                          __________________________________________________ _____________________________
                          If you think about your situation, you will find that Allaah (سبحانه وتعالى) has given you things without asking, so have trust in Allaah (سبحانه وتعالى) that He doesnít prevent anything you want except there is goodness for you.

                          You could be sleeping and the doors of the heavens are being opened with duaías being made on your behalf, SubhanAllaah: perhaps from someone poor whom you helped, or someone sad whom you brought joy, or someone passing by and you smiled at him, or someone in distress and you removed it.. so donít ever underestimate any good deeds."



                          please donate to the Ummah forum sadaqa jariya project. Click on the link for for more information, and to make a donation- https://www.justgiving.com/sadaqah-jariyah-project/

                          Comment


                          • #73
                            Re: divorce in islam vs west

                            Originally posted by Muslima London View Post
                            i am aware of that BUT t hey aer usually the breadwinners WHEN and IF they marry a man from back home

                            lsiten dont try and educate me on things that i know already
                            I've lived life a few more years then you, yoiu know.

                            i'm off to bed.

                            you hang around wtih your felllow anti-golld digger protection buddy
                            sometimes i despair at the state of the muslims. to accuse muslim sistesr of being gold diggers jeez - like your sisters in islam are no better then kaffir women. its disgusting


                            and as for this unhealthy interest in divorce at this age. why dont you address the issue with Abu Musab in his next Q&A
                            looks like both of u are very passionate about this subject lol

                            good night :)

                            Comment


                            • #74
                              Re: divorce in islam vs west

                              :salams

                              In my opinion, better get the nikah only (with a Will in case something happens to the husband). The wife should make sure her husband pays the full mahr from day 1, if she fears that he will not give it to her in case of islamic divorce.
                              God forbid, if divorce occurs, then the mahram of the woman is responsible of her care until she eventually marries again, in which case the new husband takes this role.
                              I believe that if the husband is a Muslim, he will know it's his obligation to take care of the children financially.
                              If he decides that he will not pay his due, then the woman could always go through the legal system which will make him pay regardless if he was or wasn't legally married (in most western countries).

                              Question: If you were never married to the child's mother, do you still have to pay ?

                              Answer: Yes. The obligation to support a child is not conditioned by marriage. If you are a parent, you have responsibility to financially support your offspring. Your parental responsibilities can be legally determined either through your acknowledgment that you are a parent, by the fact that you had welcomed the child into your home as your own, or as established by a paternity test. ChildSupport
                              Lastly, alimony (monthly money given to the wife) after the iddah period isn't islamic and could be seen as oppression against the husband. If the husband is ever forced to pay alimony for a legal divorce, then the woman might be committing a big sin by doing so. If the husband decides to marry again, he will be forced to keep on paying alimony to his ex-wife, and might be a burden on him for which Islam never allowed.
                              In Islam, after the woman divorces, her Mahram is responsible for her, so her Father, her Brothers, her Uncles, or her closer male relatives is obligated to take care of her. This is the Justice of Islam, and this is the way things should go insha'Allah.

                              Question: What will happen if the brother engages in polygamy? Will he have one wife legally married and one who isn't. Isn't this unfair?
                              I heard that sometimes, the first wife shames the second wife by saying she's just a 'mistress' because the she isn't married to him legally while she (the first wife) is.
                              Last edited by Muslimman3; 05-09-14, 01:50 AM.
                              ومن يتوكل على الله فهو حسبه
                              And whosoever puts his trust in Allah,
                              Then He will suffice him.

                              Comment


                              • #75
                                Re: divorce in islam vs west

                                Arrrrrgh

                                I hate it when lil kids act like know it all

                                Muslims in the ME register their marriages in the government office as well,muslim governments issue all the couples with marriage certificate to prove their union



                                Therefore registering the marriage doesn't only apply to western countries and no muslim is sinning by doing it



                                And one more thing worth mentioning is what will the father say to registery office worker when asked about the nature of his relationship to the mother when registering a child birth
                                Last edited by innocent_girl; 05-09-14, 02:01 AM.

                                http://quran.cc/images/Quranlogo.png........http://i.imgur.com/b066ayL.png

                                ďMy sin burdened me heavily. But when I measured it against Your Grace, O Lord, Your forgiveness came out greater.Ē Imam Shafie

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