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Cheating husband..what do I do??

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  • #31
    Re: Cheating husband..what do I do??

    Originally posted by Superwoman View Post
    I can't believe he sent pics of u to the girls to show how they looked better, smh

    he needs a good kick to his 'crown jewels'
    for once i agree :up:
    Ibnul Qayyim رحمه الله said: "Don’t ruin your happiness with worry, and don’t ruin your mind with pessimism. Don’t ruin your success with deception and don’t ruin the optimism of others by destroying it. Don’t ruin your day by looking back at yesterday.
    __________________________________________________ _____________________________
    If you think about your situation, you will find that Allaah (سبحانه وتعالى) has given you things without asking, so have trust in Allaah (سبحانه وتعالى) that He doesn’t prevent anything you want except there is goodness for you.

    You could be sleeping and the doors of the heavens are being opened with dua’as being made on your behalf, SubhanAllaah: perhaps from someone poor whom you helped, or someone sad whom you brought joy, or someone passing by and you smiled at him, or someone in distress and you removed it.. so don’t ever underestimate any good deeds."

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    • #32
      Re: Cheating husband..what do I do??

      I know what he did was terrible and that I probably still dont know half of it all but I really dont think divorces should be the only route out of these situations
      That is the western way of thinking in my opinion

      I mean if not for anyone else, you gota think about the kids. How they will end up and how difficult it would all be for them

      Anyways, a better option would be to just sincerely sit down and let everything out in the open.
      Obviously the husband will need to earn the trust back by working hard and the wife should open up a little and try to let him in again

      May Allah help you guys sort this out and be happy again insha Allah
      there is
      good in the world


      • #33
        Re: Cheating husband..what do I do??

        Originally posted by Superwoman View Post
        I can't believe he sent pics of u to the girls to show how they looked better, smh

        he needs a good kick to his 'crown jewels'
        He can do whatever he likes with his body coz I know what I would do ,as wife in that situation
        but to send my pic to his filthy women that totslly a different story . I would report him to the police and human rights.. etc
        He doesn't own me to send my pic .what gives him the right to do that ? seriously he would be in trouble
        How merciful Allah on me by giving me respite,and I persist in my sins and Allah shields me


        • #34
          Re: Cheating husband..what do I do??

          Originally posted by Scared Soul View Post
          Salam brothers and sister.

          I hope you guys will be able to advice me on my dilemma that I am currently facing. This is my first post on this forum. I am a mother of two children living with my husband. Both my husband and I have a very peaceful and happy life and love each other. He works and provides for us to the best of his ability. He prays and does the basic islamic day to day duties.

          Only problem is that he spends alot of time on the laptop, will hardly have any time for the kids or my self. Only a moan and nag brings him back down to family life but I have learnt to live with it, Some times we do get into heated arguments over the use of his laptop. He never takes me out or spend quality time with me. I have clearly stated many times about these issues and he has made many empty promises that he will try, but never did it happen. Few days the use of internet will calm down but slowly he goes back to it again and obviously well into late nights every night. I have tried to monitor the sites he visits but found them to be usual forums of sports and islamic discussion.I have told him many times that use of internet too much is not good and that he should learn quran or divert his attention with kids and house work.

          I love him very much and blindly trust and very committed to my married life with him. I am very simple never did I ask for any form of luxury or anything from him. My day are spent with my kids and housework, and the part time job that i have.

          Two night ago I was using the laptop and came across some very disturbing chats he was having with numerous women and with some he was very friendly. He has been sending and receiving explicit nude photos of him self!!! He told them that he was a single man and his wife left him! He even signed up on marriage sites to find these women. Some of these women were vulgar and were leading him on and complimenting on his crown jewel. He was having some very dirty explicit chats with them! He even sent photos that he took of me to these women to compare how my figure would compare with theirs!!

          I went crazy i when i found and wanted to throw him straight out of my house as he betrayed my trust and love that i have for him. I asked him to call his parents and they can decide on their sons behavior towards me and my children. He begged and apologized that it will never happen again...but i find it difficult to trust him again. Once a betrayer always betrayer. It happened once before few months ago he was whats apping some old female friend of his who he has never met. I only got suspicious when he put a pin code on his phone, and he made all promises that it wont happen again and he has not been with contact with that person but he is doing worse now. i just cant believe he betrayed me and never thought of our marriage or our kids. It took alot of my effort to get the marriage to last that long but he never respected that and has taken me for granted.

          I think he takes alot of advantage of my innocence as I always get angry and then let him off and forgive him (internet use). Although I know he will go back to his laptop use but never did I expect this kind of behavior. Never did I think he will be very x rated with women online. I am finding it very difficult to adjust and swallow this bitter pill that I am facing. May Allah show me the right direction but I genuinely think his family should know what is behind the mask. EVIL.He begs me not to tell anyone.:( Please advice brothers and sisters. Sorry for the long post but am so emotional and depressed. :(
          As this is the second time your husband has done this - sounds to me like he either doesn't take you seriously or needs help. Sometimes men are addicted to things like this and he may need counselling. But you can't force him to do this - it has to come from him. And to show the seriousness of this matter I would leave him and move in with my family for a month. This should show him the gravity of his actions and if this prompts him to get help and change his ways - good. If not, walk.