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  • Teach your wife to use Ummah

    Teach her the mouse and teach her to click.
    Help her choose her username which one to pick :o

    Make the introduction thread to say Salaam
    Let everyone know your a muslim and love Islaam.

    If you wake up and see her addicted typing till midnight,
    Tell her to use the website less as this is not right.

    If you ever go on the website do not click the ads.
    Or else she will go back and run to her dads...

  • #2
    Re: Teach your wife to use Ummah

    Poets section bro.
    [SIZE=4][COLOR="#FF0000"][FONT=Book Antiqua][CENTER][B][URL="http://www.ummah.com/forum/showthread.php?459504-Immensely-rewarding-dhikr!!!&highlight="]IMMENSELY REWARDING DHIKR!!![/URL][/B][/CENTER][/FONT][/COLOR][/SIZE]

    [FONT=Book Antiqua][SIZE=4][COLOR="#2F4F4F"][CENTER]Before you post, think..."Will this help me when I stand before Allah?" If it doesn't, then you're wasting time....[/CENTER][/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT]

    Comment


    • #3
      Re: Teach your wife to use Ummah

      Originally posted by Abdur Raheem :) View Post
      Poets section bro.
      It's a poem and marriage topic. I don't know the rules like you so microscopic.

      Thanks for letting me know. Hopefully mods will move it easy and slow.

      Comment


      • #4
        Re: Teach your wife to use Ummah

        why are you making a poem on here,
        i'll make it a bit more clear,

        dont teach your wife ummah
        unless you want your wife to be gumrah (astray)

        and keep her off marriage section
        unless you wanna face objection,

        then she gonna be yo boss
        so go eat candy floss!!!!
        Never have I dealt with anything more difficult than my own soul, which sometime helps me and sometime opposes me

        Comment


        • #5
          Re: Teach your wife to use Ummah

          Originally posted by sawm View Post
          why are you making a poem on here,
          i'll make it a bit more clear,

          dont teach your wife ummah
          unless you want your wife to be gumrah (astray)

          and keep her off marriage section
          unless you wanna face objection,

          then she gonna be yo boss
          so go eat candy floss!!!!
          sawm.. this is the illumintati everyone thought you were. lool.

          have fun rhyming.
          The Messenger of Allah ﷺ said: “It will be said to the companion of the Qur’an: ‘Read, and ascend, and recite as you used to recite in the [previous] world, for your status will be according to the last verse that you recite.’” [At-Tirmidhi (2914) and Abu Dawood (1464)]

          Comment


          • #6
            Re: Teach your wife to use Ummah

            Originally posted by sawm View Post
            why are you making a poem on here,
            i'll make it a bit more clear,

            dont teach your wife ummah
            unless you want your wife to be gumrah (astray)

            and keep her off marriage section
            unless you wanna face objection,

            then she gonna be yo boss
            so go eat candy floss!!!!
            Why are you even here if your 2nd paragraph doesn't rhyme.
            You really are here to waste ones time.

            Your a beginner so I'll go easy on you.
            I am a martial art black belt in kung fu.

            In reality your the one who will face objection.
            For your weak opinions you will face rejection.

            Comment


            • #7
              Re: Teach your wife to use Ummah

              Originally posted by Illuminati View Post
              Why are you even here if your 2nd paragraph doesn't rhyme.
              You really are here to waste ones time.

              Your a beginner so I'll go easy on you.
              I am a martial art black belt in kung fu.

              In reality your the one who will face objection.
              For your weak opinions you will face rejection.
              whoa whoa hold on bro
              will I get to meet her though?
              Your wife, your 'other half'
              Her and me we can have a laugh ;-)

              I'll look after your wife for sure
              She'll learn, meet, and more!
              So go on who is she?
              I want to meet your wife illuminati
              'Whatever it be wherein ye differ, the decision thereof is with Allah: such is Allah my Lord: In Him I trust, and to Him I turn.' The Holy Qu'ran Al Shura (Consultation)

              So, which of the favours of your lord will you deny? ~ Surah Ar Rahman

              Comment


              • #8
                Re: Teach your wife to use Ummah

                So you're back? And you didn't think to say hi?

                By the way I have something to discuss with you. I will PM you so please read it and respond promptly. Thanks.

                Comment


                • #9
                  Re: Teach your wife to use Ummah

                  Originally posted by Illuminati View Post
                  It's a poem and marriage topic. I don't know the rules like you so microscopic.

                  Thanks for letting me know. Hopefully mods will move it easy and slow.
                  I....uh.....sorry Illuminati, didn't mean to boop your party. Do you think the mods will be cool with you? Hardly.
                  [SIZE=4][COLOR="#FF0000"][FONT=Book Antiqua][CENTER][B][URL="http://www.ummah.com/forum/showthread.php?459504-Immensely-rewarding-dhikr!!!&highlight="]IMMENSELY REWARDING DHIKR!!![/URL][/B][/CENTER][/FONT][/COLOR][/SIZE]

                  [FONT=Book Antiqua][SIZE=4][COLOR="#2F4F4F"][CENTER]Before you post, think..."Will this help me when I stand before Allah?" If it doesn't, then you're wasting time....[/CENTER][/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT]

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    Re: Teach your wife to use Ummah

                    Originally posted by srahman33 View Post
                    So you're back? And you didn't think to say hi?

                    By the way I have something to discuss with you. I will PM you so please read it and respond promptly. Thanks.
                    Welcome back to you, havent seen any of ur posts either
                    My ♥ only lets الله‎ in
                    O Allah, forgive me, have mercy upon me, guide me, give me health and grant me sustenance.
                    Once you are real you can't become unreal again. It lasts for always.

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      Re: Teach your wife to use Ummah

                      If your wife comes here then warn her first,
                      That she may well be insulted, abused and cursed,

                      My members of all ages, both old and young,
                      Who dont know how to keep control of their tongue

                      Comment


                      • #12
                        Re: Teach your wife to use Ummah

                        Originally posted by SimpleTraveller View Post
                        If your wife comes here then warn her first,
                        That she may well be insulted, abused and cursed,

                        My members of all ages, both old and young,
                        Who dont know how to keep control of their tongue
                        LOOL

                        hmm
                        My ♥ only lets الله‎ in
                        O Allah, forgive me, have mercy upon me, guide me, give me health and grant me sustenance.
                        Once you are real you can't become unreal again. It lasts for always.

                        Comment


                        • #13
                          Re: Teach your wife to use Ummah

                          Originally posted by Illuminati View Post
                          Why are you even here if your 2nd paragraph doesn't rhyme.
                          You really are here to waste ones time.

                          Your a beginner so I'll go easy on you.
                          I am a martial art black belt in kung fu.

                          In reality your the one who will face objection.
                          For your weak opinions you will face rejection.
                          this the best you could do?
                          I'll hit you with a shoe.
                          Irepislam thought you were me,
                          please, let me set you free,
                          stop trying to be me.

                          you do kung fu?
                          boy I'll slap you one two,

                          but I wont cos my character is soft.
                          but I'll teach you to man up,
                          cos somebody up in here making a thread on his wife.
                          please fool get a life.

                          (OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHOHOHHHH)
                          Never have I dealt with anything more difficult than my own soul, which sometime helps me and sometime opposes me

                          Comment


                          • #14
                            Re: Teach your wife to use Ummah

                            Originally posted by sawm View Post
                            this the best you could do?
                            I'll hit you with a shoe.
                            Irepislam thought you were me,
                            please, let me set you free,
                            stop trying to be me.

                            you do kung fu?
                            boy I'll slap you one two,

                            but I wont cos my character is soft.
                            but I'll teach you to man up,
                            cos somebody up in here making a thread on his wife.
                            please fool get a life.

                            (OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHOHOHHHH)
                            i love you man.


                            laughing inrl,

                            wth kind of threat is that.
                            Last edited by عبد المنعم; 07-08-14, 07:47 PM.
                            70 scholars issued fatawas that Imam Ahmad b. Hanbal should be executed! That was the popular opinion back then, don't be fooled by popular opinion today! - Ahmad Musa jibreel


                            Tawheed Series - click

                            Comment


                            • #15
                              Re: Teach your wife to use Ummah

                              Originally posted by sawm View Post
                              this the best you could do?
                              I'll hit you with a shoe.
                              Irepislam thought you were me,
                              please, let me set you free,
                              stop trying to be me.

                              you do kung fu?
                              boy I'll slap you one two,

                              but I wont cos my character is soft.
                              but I'll teach you to man up,
                              cos somebody up in here making a thread on his wife.
                              please fool get a life.

                              (OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHOHOHHHH)
                              oohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh oh oh oh.

                              :rofl1:
                              The Messenger of Allah ﷺ said: “It will be said to the companion of the Qur’an: ‘Read, and ascend, and recite as you used to recite in the [previous] world, for your status will be according to the last verse that you recite.’” [At-Tirmidhi (2914) and Abu Dawood (1464)]

                              Comment

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