Ads by Muslim Ad Network

Announcement

Collapse
No announcement yet.

Muslim and white - why is it so hard to find a partner?

Collapse
X
 
  • Filter
  • Time
  • Show
Clear All
new posts

  • In my Opinion
    replied
    Re: Muslim and white - why is it so hard to find a partner?

    Originally posted by Jade Vine View Post
    I have been thinking a lot, and trying to figure it out. I don't know what to do.
    I am no racist really, I love all people. I just can't imagine to marry outside my race (what caucasian that is). I would really want to change it, but failed miserably and now I give up. I can't do it. It is so hard to meet someone the same race, and most often we are not compatible for some reason, and here we go again. It's frustrating.
    Please don't judge me, I am who I am, and I can't lie and pretend that I can do something I cannot.
    I would just like to hear some advice if you have any, without being judgemental...
    Question, have you actually met people of other races? Spent time with them?

    I used to think like you - never marry a Caucasian. But my perspectives have changed over the years - it's called maturing and being less idealistic.

    The only person you end up ruining things for is youself by closing out your options - how many Caucasian reverts do you know? Exactly.

    My advise would be to spend more time with people of all cultures - broaden your mind - see beyond the superficial.

    Leave a comment:


  • Minzur
    replied
    Re: Muslim and white - why is it so hard to find a partner?

    Why wouldnt you go for another 'race' i,e skin colour, even if they have the same culture? They are ugly?

    Leave a comment:


  • noobz
    replied
    Re: Muslim and white - why is it so hard to find a partner?

    Originally posted by TurkishTatar View Post
    AAAAAAAAAAAaAnd its not racist. Drop the Race card. Its her own personal preference.
    u should dig up some old threads made by the guys and see how the female members are screaming racism for not preferring to marry blacks or whites.

    Leave a comment:


  • pallas
    replied
    Re: Muslim and white - why is it so hard to find a partner?

    Originally posted by Tawheed_Luvr View Post
    If was a preference for marrying ones own culture I could understand it more. White is not an ethnicity for one. I dont know if its racist or not, but its certainly silly to think that because someone is white, they are somehow the same culturally. An Australian and an Albanian, or a Chechen are very different culturally, as is British and Bosnian. 'race' is a stupid concept - although culture is certainly more understandable.
    They are not the same culturally of course there are differences, I had said it more from the fact that I did not know where she is from. But one can see it from a cultural point of view, from the perspective that an Egyptian person is more similar to a Saudi, a Pakistani more similar to a Bangladeshi, a Brit more similar to a French man culture wise. There are still many differences, but this is what I thought the sister meant. Thus greater similarity in culture and mentality. Though this is a generalization, thus it is not always the case.

    I personally believe that one should be able to marry from whatever culture or race that they desire, but I find it hypocritical when it would be seen as racist if one wants to marry from their own nation/race.

    Leave a comment:


  • Nulbreaker
    replied
    Re: Muslim and white - why is it so hard to find a partner?

    Originally posted by Tawheed_Luvr View Post
    Bosnians/Albanians are sometimes white (though also sometimes darker) but are not the same race and have very different cultures. A British white person has far more in common with the average British desi person than a white Albanian.
    In terms of dress and language they have things in common, in terms of how they behave at home and socialising they are worlds apart.

    Leave a comment:


  • Tawheed_Luvr
    replied
    Re: Muslim and white - why is it so hard to find a partner?

    Originally posted by pallas View Post
    Why should it be racist for white people to have this preference and for other races not? That is hypocritical in my opinion. If you prefer to marry someone from your own race/ethnicity, you should do so. In my opinion it would be racist if people call you a racist because of this preference. It would be racist if one does not want to marry someone from an other race because they think they are inferior based on skin tone.

    Culture and the like do play a huge role in a marriage. How much people want to deny it. And what I have seen is that once a white revert ( in these cases) marries a guy or girl from a complete different culture, despite being both Muslims. The white partner is expected to completely immerse themselves in that culture and abandon their own.

    There are white ethnic Muslim groups one can marry with, next to reverts. Perhaps you can consider those?
    If was a preference for marrying ones own culture I could understand it more. White is not an ethnicity for one. I dont know if its racist or not, but its certainly silly to think that because someone is white, they are somehow the same culturally. An Australian and an Albanian, or a Chechen are very different culturally, as is British and Bosnian. 'race' is a stupid concept - although culture is certainly more understandable.

    Leave a comment:


  • pallas
    replied
    Re: Muslim and white - why is it so hard to find a partner?

    Why should it be racist for white people to have this preference and for other races not? That is hypocritical in my opinion. If you prefer to marry someone from your own race/ethnicity, you should do so. In my opinion it would be racist if people call you a racist because of this preference. It would be racist if one does not want to marry someone from an other race because they think they are inferior based on skin tone.

    Culture and the like do play a huge role in a marriage. How much people want to deny it. And what I have seen is that once a white revert ( in these cases) marries a guy or girl from a complete different culture, despite being both Muslims. The white partner is expected to completely immerse themselves in that culture and abandon their own.

    There are white ethnic Muslim groups one can marry with, next to reverts. Perhaps you can consider those?

    Leave a comment:


  • Nulbreaker
    replied
    Re: Muslim and white - why is it so hard to find a partner?

    Originally posted by UmmAbdulMalik View Post
    Lol



    I genuinly propose that no SISTER (notice: excluding brothers.) marries from outside to another non western country.

    Not saying he's a passport digger but U can NEVER be certain.


    Lol Jade I agree, Arab guys are good looking, exceptionally actually ma shaa Allah but the culture and all the customs and whatever I can't get round.
    Btw I applaud you for doing thorough digging and research and not behaving on mere impulse, like 'Ooo he likes me , I'll go for him'. It's not like that and should never be like that especially because your a revert, most guys will dig you automatically.
    Like some revert women marry very quickly and divorce very quickly because of culture shock, lack of integration within the family, and often more times than not their used for their citizenship.
    Be careful sister, and do careful research on all potnetials. And only marry someone whom you and your wali are certain of and you are happy with.
    He's in Italy, Italian born and bred. You would have to be out of your mind to leave Italy for the UK. God has blessed Italians in many ways.

    Leave a comment:


  • TurkishTatar
    replied
    Re: Muslim and white - why is it so hard to find a partner?

    AAAAAAAAAAAaAnd its not racist. Drop the Race card. Its her own personal preference.

    Leave a comment:


  • Perseveranze
    replied
    Re: Muslim and white - why is it so hard to find a partner?

    Asalaamu Alaikum,

    Can't really do anything about having a racial preference or force yourself to like something. It's blameless.

    I think it's just more of a shame than anything else.
    Last edited by Perseveranze; 22-06-14, 03:17 PM.

    Leave a comment:


  • UmmAbdulMalik
    replied
    Re: Muslim and white - why is it so hard to find a partner?

    Originally posted by Nulbreaker View Post
    I am on several facebook groups. He's in Italy, speaks English but looks more American than Italian.
    Lol



    I genuinly propose that no SISTER (notice: excluding brothers.) marries from outside to another non western country.

    Not saying he's a passport digger but U can NEVER be certain.


    Lol Jade I agree, Arab guys are good looking, exceptionally actually ma shaa Allah but the culture and all the customs and whatever I can't get round.
    Btw I applaud you for doing thorough digging and research and not behaving on mere impulse, like 'Ooo he likes me , I'll go for him'. It's not like that and should never be like that especially because your a revert, most guys will dig you automatically.
    Like some revert women marry very quickly and divorce very quickly because of culture shock, lack of integration within the family, and often more times than not their used for their citizenship.
    Be careful sister, and do careful research on all potnetials. And only marry someone whom you and your wali are certain of and you are happy with.

    Leave a comment:


  • TurkishTatar
    replied
    Re: Muslim and white - why is it so hard to find a partner?

    Originally posted by Jade Vine View Post
    I am one...and tried many of them...
    Have you tried looking around Turks or Or the many Muslim Russians Ethnicity?


    Are you living in area where there are no other Bosnians? Have you tried to get a male relative of yours to Network potential suitors?

    Leave a comment:


  • Nulbreaker
    replied
    Re: Muslim and white - why is it so hard to find a partner?

    Originally posted by Jade Vine View Post
    Nulbreaker, where did you find that guy :) you have some kind of database or something :) Can he speak English or French?
    I am on several facebook groups. He's in Italy, speaks English but looks more American than Italian.

    Leave a comment:


  • Asma28
    replied
    Re: Muslim and white - why is it so hard to find a partner?

    Why would anyone judge you, its a preference thing. Just as some people won't marry someone too tall, too short, too dark, too fat, too uneducated etc they can also reject on race. May appear racist to some people but its not, its preference. If you can't get attracted to other races then naturally there will be a problem marrying them. Sadly there are many asians who openly say they'd prefer not to marry a black muslim brother or sister.

    Leave a comment:


  • Jade Vine
    replied
    Re: Muslim and white - why is it so hard to find a partner?

    Originally posted by LailaTheMuslim View Post
    i do find some of the posts here racist, like the nonsense abt avoiding arabs
    I avoid Arabs, but actually that doesn't have anything to do with their skin color, some of them are very attractive. But experience of many of my friends and acquaintances are very negative, they have been treated pretty badly, and the culture clash was so hard that very few marriages actually worked (I know about 3 marriages that worked and 54 that failed). It's too much of a risk and I am not willing to take it, no matter how good looking they may be.

    Leave a comment:

Working...
X