Ads by Muslim Ad Network

Announcement

Collapse
No announcement yet.

Reasons why women are being abused in marriages nowadays.

Collapse
X
  • Filter
  • Time
  • Show
Clear All
new posts

  • Reasons why women are being abused in marriages nowadays.

    This thought crossed my mind a few times and it's interesting because Ive found there's usually two common denominators:

    - The women are emotionally attached, financially dependant, and almost enslaved mentally to the husband.
    - The women has been culturally programmed to withstand all forms of abuse be they physical or mental because she's the wife and her husband can do whatever he wishes, since she's under his guardianship.
    I've also noticed there's been a huge surge in the number of domestic violence cases over the past few year. I've always wondered:
    WHY?

    I've always had the mindset that: if a guy so much as 'hits' me in any grievously harmful way, or attempts to warp my mind, controll me excessively like I'm a peice of property which he can mould as he pleases, then I would never stick with him. However, that's easy to say but I feel it's harder to practice for most women. It's a hard choice for some people especially women who are uneducated about worldy affairs, money, work life etc. that's an incredibly vulenerable state to be in in my opnion, because a man who doesn't fear Allah and even those who do may sometimes let their 'power' get to them, may abuse the women and treat her dishonourably. After all, she's under THEIR care, and in terms of worldy affairs she's dependant upon him.

    It's very sad actually, especially for back home women.

    I also believe this is another of the reasons why men seek backhome women because they know in either circumstance she's under their roof, can't support herself even if she tried e.g immigration issues and whatnot, and thus she will be loyal and basically like a little puppy they can play with. In other words, they'd have complete dominance in the relationship. Most men fear western muslimahs because many a time they're educated and can stand on their own two feet, I've always thought in any case of a bad marriage that it's not the end, I mean if you lived without that person, you can live without them after.

    Hmm


    Wanted to see your views on this topic.

  • #2
    Re: Reasons why women are being abused in marriages nowadays.

    nowadays? abuse has always been happening towards woman

    its like you said, the main reasons is she will become solely dependant on him in more ways than one and they take full advantage of that. the dependency gives them that weird sense of 'I own her' which is something that most men crave, lets face it. haven't they always wanted to 'own' a woman?

    therefore some of them take advantage of that fact and beat and abuse her because to fulfil some sick perverse of theirs... and because its pretty much all they can do to make them feel like a man. not like they will ever have the guts to fight a man their own size. aww.

    Comment


    • #3
      Re: Reasons why women are being abused in marriages nowadays.

      Domestic Violence happens to all women, crossing racial, ethnic, religious and class divides. I think It comes down to self- respect. Teach young woman to have standards and not fall short of them.

      Comment


      • #4
        Re: Reasons why women are being abused in marriages nowadays.

        I am going to beat my wife









        Beat her in a race.....................
        Ya Muqallib Al-Quloob Thabbit Qalbi Alaa Deenik
        ( O changer of hearts, keep my heart steadfast on your deen)

        www.treasureofthescholars.wordpress.com

        Comment


        • #5
          Reasons why women are being abused in marriages nowadays.

          D:
          Sometimes to shut the woman up.
          Sometimes to let out some steam.
          Sometimes to show her imaginative 'place'.
          Sometimes to feel good about themselves.
          6:62 "Then are they restored unto Allah, their Lord, the Just. Surely His is the judgment. And He is the most swift of reckoners."

          Comment


          • #6
            Re: Reasons why women are being abused in marriages nowadays.

            I actually think abuse has decreased. Think about it in the past
            women were more scared to report it. If you did the whole town would
            be against you. Now there are consequences in some parts of the world
            for abusing women.
            Abuse happens because men want to control women and when they can't
            get what they want like little children they become aggressive. Most parents
            don't sit down with their boys or children and tell them how to behave.
            Another thing is women sometimes don't take warning signs seriously.
            An abusive man doesn't turn out abusive or aggressive after marriage.
            The signs are all there before marriage and some women ignore them.

            Comment


            • #7
              Re: Reasons why women are being abused in marriages nowadays.

              Originally posted by Zakarya View Post
              I actually think abuse has decreased. Think about it in the past
              women were more scared to report it. If you did the whole town would
              be against you. Now there are consequences in some parts of the world
              for abusing women.
              Abuse happens because men want to control women and when they can't
              get what they want like little children they become aggressive. Most parents
              don't sit down with their boys or children and tell them how to behave.
              Another thing is women sometimes don't take warning signs seriously.
              An abusive man doesn't turn out abusive or aggressive after marriage.
              The signs are all there before marriage and some women ignore them.
              Hmm
              Appreciate the response.

              What are some tell tale signs to look for pre-marriage?

              Comment


              • #8
                Re: Reasons why women are being abused in marriages nowadays.

                how about the men who get abused?lol

                Comment


                • #9
                  Re: Reasons why women are being abused in marriages nowadays.

                  Asalaamu Alaikum,

                  No offence, but you need to stop generalising people, whether it's South Asians, men or "women from back home". Use a bit of common sense and don't just judge a whole group based on your own small experiences - it's not Islamic or smart.

                  Originally posted by UmmAbdulMalik View Post
                  Most men fear western muslimahs
                  SubhanAllah, do you read what you post? If you have such perceptions, and feel this way about your brothers, then you probably should take a break from these forums or any places that you feel influence these irrational feelings of hate towards the other gender.

                  That goes for anyone that thinks like this about brothers or sisters.
                  A Fast Growing Islamic Search Website -

                  www.Searching-Islam.com

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    Re: Reasons why women are being abused in marriages nowadays.

                    Originally posted by Perseveranze View Post
                    Asalaamu Alaikum,

                    No offence, but you need to stop generalising people, whether it's South Asians, men or "women from back home". Use a bit of common sense and don't just judge a whole group based on your own small experiences - it's not Islamic or smart.



                    SubhanAllah, do you read what you post? If you have such perceptions, and feel this way about your brothers, then you probably should take a break from these forums or any places that you feel influence these irrational feelings of hate towards the other gender.

                    That goes for anyone that thinks like this about brothers or sisters.
                    Lol exactly.

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      Re: Reasons why women are being abused in marriages nowadays.

                      Easy way to fix the problem? Marry a man who is actually practicing.

                      A pious, sincere, humble woman is a great treasure. She shouldn't be given to just any man, but one who deserves her.

                      Parents should stop chasing culture, money, looks, and social status. They need to chase serious deen.
                      If you have any questions feel free to PM me!

                      Humililty, Sincerity, and the quest for Truth. There is no purpose in life but to seek the pleasure of Allah.
                      There is a possibility a female might use this account to read something!

                      Comment


                      • #12
                        Re: Reasons why women are being abused in marriages nowadays.

                        Originally posted by al-siddiq View Post
                        Easy way to fix the problem? Marry a man who is actually practicing.

                        A pious, sincere, humble woman is a great treasure. She shouldn't be given to just any man, but one who deserves her.

                        Parents should stop chasing culture, money, looks, and social status. They need to chase serious deen.

                        I appreciate that...!

                        Comment


                        • #13
                          Re: Reasons why women are being abused in marriages nowadays.

                          Her parents look at their future son in laws wealth and his family background (they dont really pay much attention to how his mother father and siblings are) I have seen so many cases where the girls parents are told that he(the potential groom for their daughter) is not viable and he shouldnt be considered. And I dont know but i guess wealth has some kind of a spell on girl's parents so they agree to it and get their daughter married to that tool. Thus her miserable life starts.
                          Please Please Please Make Dua for these [URL="http://www.ummah.com/forum/showthread.php?455964-Plz-Make-Dua-for-these-members&p=6715010&viewfull=1#post6715010"]Click Here[/URL] JazakAllahi

                          Comment


                          • #14
                            Re: Reasons why women are being abused in marriages nowadays.

                            Originally posted by al-siddiq View Post
                            Easy way to fix the problem? Marry a man who is actually practicing.
                            Dont believe that at all. I used to work with a couple of Muslimahs who volunteered at an ethnic women's shelter and they were shocked that the majority of the Muslim women who ended up there had practising husbands. Just because someone is practising it doesn't mean they are empathetic. These are two different things.
                            Last edited by Aashiq; 23-06-14, 09:56 AM.
                            [B][COLOR="#008000"]Hum to tere Aashiq hai sadiyo puraane[/COLOR][/B]

                            Comment


                            • #15
                              Re: Reasons why women are being abused in marriages nowadays.

                              Originally posted by UmmAbdulMalik View Post
                              This thought crossed my mind a few times and it's interesting because Ive found there's usually two common denominators:
                              You have it completely wrong. Women are less abused than ever before.

                              The difference is that in the past, a wife was seen as a husbands property and so domestic abuse wasnt pursued as a crime by the police. It was seen as a personal matter between husband and wife. People didnt talk about it. Nowadays it has become a crime and so people talk about it and it's more prominent.
                              [B][COLOR="#008000"]Hum to tere Aashiq hai sadiyo puraane[/COLOR][/B]

                              Comment

                              Working...
                              X