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Asexual Marriage

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  • LoveIsTheAnswer
    started a topic Asexual Marriage

    Asexual Marriage

    I am just asking a hypothetical question and I am not specifically asking a question about an Islamic marriage but marriage in general.

    How would a girl feel marrying a man who is asexual. This would mean that you would never have sex with him since he lacks any desire to have sex at all. I myself am asexual and it is hard to tell others that I really have no interest in sex, I do not care about it, I do not want it and I find it ridiculous. This of course always leaves people in disbelief because they do not see how one cannot have a sexual orientation.
    Can any girl here wrap her mind around having a sexless but happy marriage? Is sex really required to be in a relationship(marriage) with someone?

  • LoveIsTheAnswer
    replied
    Re: Asexual Marriage

    This seems to be my big dilemma. I am not a Muslim but I wonder about how various religions handle this matter since it is not mentioned at all in most cases. Just seems to me that people overlook things

    Leave a comment:


  • RewriteDestiny
    replied
    Re: Asexual Marriage

    Originally posted by LoveIsTheAnswer View Post
    I am just asking a hypothetical question and I am not specifically asking a question about an Islamic marriage but marriage in general.

    How would a girl feel marrying a man who is asexual. This would mean that you would never have sex with him since he lacks any desire to have sex at all. I myself am asexual and it is hard to tell others that I really have no interest in sex, I do not care about it, I do not want it and I find it ridiculous. This of course always leaves people in disbelief because they do not see how one cannot have a sexual orientation.
    Can any girl here wrap her mind around having a sexless but happy marriage? Is sex really required to be in a relationship(marriage) with someone?
    I`m surprised so many people think that author is a troll. I often heared women complaining that there is no possibility of asexual marriage (or rather that almost all men find this unrealistic). Yes, there are interested women. Some people do not have sexual drive but many of them miss kindness, deep platonic bond, sense of unity, and tackling the troubles in life together. The trouble I see would be if whichever side of marriage changed their mind later in life. I`m 26 year old asexual - I never had any relationship, didn`t even romantically hold a hand of person of opposite gender.

    Leave a comment:


  • LoveIsTheAnswer
    replied
    Re: Asexual Marriage

    Originally posted by bismillaah View Post
    this might actually be ideal for some people, but i would imagine it be so hard to find a like minded person. can you imagine asking this in a meeting? lol
    I know. It is very awkward and I have attempted to tell others in general but it feels weird. I get flirted on by girls and I know they are looking for sex but I will never go with them. I am young and women living in a secular society do not have marriage or partnership in mind while I on the other hand do.

    @OP Are you muslim? cos if not, then there is no point asking muslim sisters this q
    I am not a Muslim. I just wanted to know the opinions of females that is all. Whether they are Muslim or not is irrelevant since I just needed to know the impact of sex in marriage. Muslims and non-Muslims do a lot of the same thing sin marriage ya know :p.

    Leave a comment:


  • bismillaah
    replied
    Re: Asexual Marriage

    this might actually be ideal for some people, but i would imagine it be so hard to find a like minded person. can you imagine asking this in a meeting? lol

    @OP Are you muslim? cos if not, then there is no point asking muslim sisters this q

    Leave a comment:


  • LoveIsTheAnswer
    replied
    Re: Asexual Marriage

    Originally posted by Kalikatu View Post
    I think it might be a good chance for a woman who has abusive past or who are very insecure about their bodies to marry an asexual person. It is a chance for them to learn to trust men again and also to be comfortable with their bodies. Although not all are ok with sex they're ok with other forms of intimacy. And if such a marriage would teach them to trust men again and if they later wanted to include sex in their lives, divorce wouldn't be so much of a hassle. I imagine it being like living with your best friend plus having a cuddle buddy. There's a reason why asexuals are around.
    This is actually very kind of you to think of such a thing :). I have been apart of the asexual community for years and what you describe dis actually kinda common. Since asexuals have no interest in sex they focus on quality of character. What you have described is a chance for the weak and abused to be given a chance.
    Although I do not believe in a divine purpose your thoughts are inspiring

    Leave a comment:


  • wizard.of.oz
    replied
    Re: Asexual Marriage

    Originally posted by Saif-Uddin View Post
    There is little point posting this here,

    they were propogating Islam and had little time for themselves, in no way is out situation comparable to them,

    we were told by Rasulullah :saw: to marry, as it helps us Lower our Gaze and Guard our Modesty, protects us from Shameless deeds,

    :jkk:
    Muslims make marriage difficult, and suddenly the haraam becomes so easy.

    Leave a comment:


  • Saif-Uddin
    replied
    Re: Asexual Marriage

    Originally posted by Musbah View Post
    Actually famous Muslim scholars such as Ibn Taymiyyah, Ibn Jarir at Tabari and Imam Nawawi never married.
    There is little point posting this here,

    they were propogating Islam and had little time for themselves, in no way is out situation comparable to them,

    we were told by Rasulullah :saw: to marry, as it helps us Lower our Gaze and Guard our Modesty, protects us from Shameless deeds,

    :jkk:

    Leave a comment:


  • Grimmjow
    replied
    Re: Asexual Marriage

    Originally posted by Musbah View Post
    Actually famous Muslim scholars such as Ibn Taymiyyah, Ibn Jarir at Tabari and Imam Nawawi never married.
    But there were slave girls back then, weren't there?

    Leave a comment:


  • Asma28
    replied
    Re: Asexual Marriage

    Originally posted by UmmAbdulMalik View Post
    Are you crazy?


    You must be coocoo sis. Sorry, OP but I and any other normal women couldn't live with that.

    Sex is fundamental to any marriage.
    Lol why should that make me crazy. you and other women couldn't live with that but there are also many women who could.

    Leave a comment:


  • LoveIsTheAnswer
    replied
    Re: Asexual Marriage

    Originally posted by SoulMuslim View Post
    It's not mandatory if both doesn't want sex, but if one wants sex, the other spouse must fulfill that responsibility.
    Ahhh, I see. I am actually aware of this part because I recall that Islamic Marriage has a form of Duty Ethics where the needs of one must be fulfilled if it does not break Islamic jurisprudence. Sort of weird to me but I fully understand it.

    Leave a comment:


  • Musbah
    replied
    Re: Asexual Marriage

    Originally posted by LoveIsTheAnswer View Post
    I know that asceticism is not halal but this sounds a bit hedonistic to me.
    Actually famous Muslim scholars such as Ibn Taymiyyah, Ibn Jarir at Tabari and Imam Nawawi never married.

    Leave a comment:


  • Kalikatu
    replied
    Asexual Marriage

    I think it might be a good chance for a woman who has abusive past or who are very insecure about their bodies to marry an asexual person. It is a chance for them to learn to trust men again and also to be comfortable with their bodies. Although not all are ok with sex they're ok with other forms of intimacy. And if such a marriage would teach them to trust men again and if they later wanted to include sex in their lives, divorce wouldn't be so much of a hassle. I imagine it being like living with your best friend plus having a cuddle buddy. There's a reason why asexuals are around.

    Leave a comment:


  • Rainyday
    replied
    Re: Asexual Marriage

    Ideally, marry and asexual women.

    Definitely tell her before you marry her.

    I imagine most women would feel peed off and a bit 'unloved' to learn their husbands will never want sex with her.

    Leave a comment:


  • ~Salma~
    replied
    Re: Asexual Marriage

    That's up to you but how you gonna have kids?

    Leave a comment:

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