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So, you finally get married...where do you find accomodation?

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  • So, you finally get married...where do you find accomodation?

    Alhamdullilah a lot of people on Ummah forum are following the sunnah by getting married.
    And they follow the Islamic best principals for the husband to be the provider and wife to bring up the family.

    There is sometimes the clash between the wife and the mother-in-law. And the wife or husband wants to live by themselves.
    My question to those married is how do you manage with life in the West? The cost of living has gone up incredibly.

    In particular, accomodation - do you rent or get a mortgage?
    Does the husband only work or do both husband and wife work?
    How does this affect bringing up your children?

  • #2
    Re: So, you finally get married...where do you find accomodation?

    Originally posted by Ibn Ahmed44 View Post
    Alhamdullilah a lot of people on Ummah forum are following the sunnah by getting married.
    And they follow the Islamic best principals for the husband to be the provider and wife to bring up the family.

    There is sometimes the clash between the wife and the mother-in-law. And the wife or husband wants to live by themselves.
    My question to those married is how do you manage with life in the West? The cost of living has gone up incredibly.

    In particular, accomodation - do you rent or get a mortgage?
    Does the husband only work or do both husband and wife work?
    How does this affect bringing up your children?
    assalaamu alaykum,

    I manage quite easily by living in a not too expensive city and living modestly, even though i've not had a steady income for near 3 years.

    Now some people really stuggle, because they insist in living in the wrong place, i.e they simply cannot afford it. as you are starting out, don't fall for this mistake. There is no necessity to live in the capital city of whichever country you come from, no necessity to live in the most desired areas and I have yet to find someone claiming durarah for a mortgage actually proving their case.

    As for the wife working, this is there for her if she wishes but it is her money, not the households. the husband is meant to provide, not the wife and husband together.

    And yes a wife working will obviously affect the kids. it makes homeschooling impossible, and even getting your kids to / from madrasah difficult. if your wife is out of the home then your kids are going to be handed over to someone else, be it family, friends or worse kuffar daycare centres.
    Abu Saalehah

    OUTREACH4ISLAM - Calling the not yet Muslims of Leicester to Islam since 2006

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    • #3
      Re: So, you finally get married...where do you find accomodation?

      Originally posted by Ibn Ahmed44 View Post
      Alhamdullilah a lot of people on Ummah forum are following the sunnah by getting married.
      And they follow the Islamic best principals for the husband to be the provider and wife to bring up the family.

      There is sometimes the clash between the wife and the mother-in-law. And the wife or husband wants to live by themselves.
      My question to those married is how do you manage with life in the West? The cost of living has gone up incredibly.

      In particular, accomodation - do you rent or get a mortgage?
      Does the husband only work or do both husband and wife work?
      How does this affect bringing up your children?
      as you know the norm for asians is for wife to stay at husbands house with parents. some areas are pretty expensive, but can always move somewhere else where its cheaper. i prefer to rent, better than paying some stupid haram mortgage. many fall into silly trap of going for haram mortage as monthly payments usually cheaper than renting, and get to 'own' it, but probably die before its paid off in full lol. dont have kids yet so not facing any difficulties. if wife wants to work, that's up to her, I wouldn't be relying on her income.
      Know that the life of this world is but amusement and diversion and adornment and boasting to one another and competition in increase of wealth and children...

      -Quran (57:20)

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