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Domestic Discipline and obeying the husband

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    #31
    Re: Domestic Discipline and obeying the husband

    Originally posted by cooldog View Post
    Where did u get that from ? She stated explicitly that she has a temper and she is disrespectful toward her husband.She wants to be put in line because she cannot control herself on her own.

    I never said this situation was normal, if u need someone to spank u, then u have childhood issues, so lets blame the husband coz his wifes a mess.He is amazing to even put up with her.

    I dont see the wife as bad.But she is the one asking the question here, she is the one telling us that she has been bad, and she is the one telling us that her husband is a kind man.And apparently you know better about her and her husband.

    You see Im not perceiving anything, which is the whole point of this.She says she has been disobedient.I believe her.

    Carry on with your assumptions.
    Ok bro, lets call a truce here. You are right nobody needs to make assumptions about anyone. I won't make them about you, you don't make them about me, and we won't make them about the OP and her husband. BTW, I was not assuming anything about the OP's husband, just asking some questions to clarify the situation. It could be she is perceiving things different then how they really are, or it could be accurate that she is very naughty and her husband is an angel. We don't know unless we ask her why she feels this way. Maybe you are taking everything she says at face value and I am reading into them more. It doesn't make either of us right or wrong. The OP is the one who knows, not us. I'm just trying to help her think about what's going on.
    Blessed is He in Whose Hand is the Dominion, and He is Able to do all things. (67.1)

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      #32
      Re: Domestic Discipline and obeying the husband

      Originally posted by inprogress View Post
      Ok bro, lets call a truce here. You are right nobody needs to make assumptions about anyone. I won't make them about you, you don't make them about me, and we won't make them about the OP and her husband. BTW, I was not assuming anything about the OP's husband, just asking some questions to clarify the situation. It could be she is perceiving things different then how they really are, or it could be accurate that she is very naughty and her husband is an angel. We don't know unless we ask her why she feels this way. Maybe you are taking everything she says at face value and I am reading into them more. It doesn't make either of us right or wrong. The OP is the one who knows, not us. I'm just trying to help her think about what's going on.
      Hence the spanking :p

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        #33
        Re: Domestic Discipline and obeying the husband

        These words. Naughty. Discipline. Sounds more like parent and child.

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          #34
          Re: Domestic Discipline and obeying the husband

          smh, another one hit wonder troll it seems like.
          Fabi-ayyiala -i rabbikuma tukaththibani
          Then which of the favors of your Lord will ye deny?
          http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vr8DR8frP_s

          You are not here just to fill space or to be a background character in someone else's movie. Consider this: nothing would be the same if you did not exist. Every place you have ever been and everyone you have ever spoken to would be different without you. We are all connected, and we are all affected by the decisions and even the existence of those around us.

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            #35
            Re: Domestic Discipline and obeying the husband

            Originally posted by |Sister| View Post
            Doing this when a man is trying to comfort you will hurt his pride and mostly likely would prevent him from wanting to cheer you up in the future. It would definitely make the problem/anger last longer.
            Mostly, but I think the issue is just about consent. For me, it just goes back to the fundamental issue of "only touch me if I give you the permission". Also, I've noticed that when people are upset they will put themselves physically far away to avoid being touched, so to go against that would be rude (in my opinion).
            Even my parents know that I'm a very cuddly person, but when I don't want to be touched it's serious.

            To each their own! :D

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              #36
              Re: Domestic Discipline and obeying the husband

              Originally posted by HmInh View Post
              Mostly, but I think the issue is just about consent. For me, it just goes back to the fundamental issue of "only touch me if I give you the permission". Also, I've noticed that when people are upset they will put themselves physically far away to avoid being touched, so to go against that would be rude (in my opinion).
              Even my parents know that I'm a very cuddly person, but when I don't want to be touched it's serious.

              To each their own! :D
              This is a secular, westernized view about personal space. That, inshaAllah, will dissappear with time. Marriage in Islam is not like marriage in western countries. We are forbidden from touching anyone, ever, unless married. When married, there is no "permission", because the permission is the marriage itself; it's an agreement between both parties that includes full physical freedom. In Islam, He's not breaking any laws if he touches you (regardless of your mood), as long as he doesn't hurt you. If he keeps following you around poking you in the eyeball, that's another story.

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                #37
                Re: Domestic Discipline and obeying the husband

                Originally posted by |Sister| View Post
                This is a secular, westernized view about personal space. That, inshaAllah, will dissappear with time. Marriage in Islam is not like marriage in western countries. We are forbidden from touching anyone, ever, unless married. When married, there is no "permission", because the permission is the marriage itself; it's an agreement between both parties that includes full physical freedom. In Islam, He's not breaking any laws if he touches you (regardless of your mood), as long as he doesn't hurt you. If he keeps following you around poking you in the eyeball, that's another story.
                I think what you are referring to Islamically is the type of touching that will lead one to satisfy their desires, which is not what we are discussing in this situation. We are talking about someone touching another to try to make them feel better when indeed at that moment it would not make them feel better, maybe worse. So what's the wisdom in doing that?
                Blessed is He in Whose Hand is the Dominion, and He is Able to do all things. (67.1)

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                  #38
                  Re: Domestic Discipline and obeying the husband

                  Originally posted by |Sister| View Post
                  This is a secular, westernized view about personal space. That, inshaAllah, will dissappear with time. Marriage in Islam is not like marriage in western countries. We are forbidden from touching anyone, ever, unless married. When married, there is no "permission", because the permission is the marriage itself; it's an agreement between both parties that includes full physical freedom. In Islam, He's not breaking any laws if he touches you (regardless of your mood), as long as he doesn't hurt you. If he keeps following you around poking you in the eyeball, that's another story.
                  Hmm... maybe it is a bit secular/Western, but I don't necessarily think that it's a bad thing. It doesn't necessarily go against any Islamic values to say that if I tell my husband I don't want to be touched at the current moment, he shouldn't touch me, is it?

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