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If the wife already earns for herself

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  • If the wife already earns for herself

    Do you think you'd feel a little apprehensive about a prospective partner if you knew she already has a well paid professional job? This would mean that there would be less reliance and dependency from the wife on her husband. The husband might feel inadequate because of this.

    Part-time jobs or normal jobs often don't pay that well relatively speaking, and the wife has some extras on the side if she wants to spend buying gifts for her husband or other things.

  • #2
    Re: If the wife already earns for herself

    depends on her level of following the deen, if she is a good muslimah she will respect and value her husband as part of the deen.

    if cultural or westernised muslim then could be problems.
    Abu Saalehah

    OUTREACH4ISLAM - Calling the not yet Muslims of Leicester to Islam since 2006

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    • #3
      Re: If the wife already earns for herself

      Originally posted by WayOfLife View Post
      Do you think you'd feel a little apprehensive about a prospective partner if you knew she already has a well paid professional job? This would mean that there would be less reliance and dependency from the wife on her husband. The husband might feel inadequate because of this.

      Part-time jobs or normal jobs often don't pay that well relatively speaking, and the wife has some extras on the side if she wants to spend buying gifts for her husband or other things.
      I would say the husband is insecure if he feels that way. her money has nothing to do with him. her finances shouldn't concern him. even if the woman doesn't have a job, alot women have money from their families or inheritance.

      as long as her job isn't something haraam like working in an interest based bank.

      and in this day and age a woman should have some type of financial independence. if something happens to the husband how will she provide for herself and kids. we don't live in a time anymore where the woman's family or in laws and can support her if the husband dies or she gets a divorce. the families and in laws can barely take care of themselves. and if she is a revert it applies even more.

      as long as the wife isn't rubbing in his face that she makes more than him (like i know some sisters do) he shouldn't feel less adequate.
      Say, O My servants who have transgressed against themselves [by sinning], do not despair of the mercy of Allah . Indeed, Allah forgives all sins. Indeed, it is He who is the Forgiving, the Merciful.”
      (Surah Az Zumar, (Chapter 39: Verse 53)

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      • #4
        Re: If the wife already earns for herself

        Originally posted by sis_niqabi View Post
        I would say the husband is insecure if he feels that way. her money has nothing to do with him. her finances shouldn't concern him. even if the woman doesn't have a job, alot women have money from their families or inheritance.

        as long as her job isn't something haraam like working in an interest based bank.

        and in this day and age a woman should have some type of financial independence. if something happens to the husband how will she provide for herself and kids. we don't live in a time anymore where the woman's family or in laws and can support her if the husband dies or she gets a divorce. the families and in laws can barely take care of themselves. and if she is a revert it applies even more.

        as long as the wife isn't rubbing in his face that she makes more than him (like i know some sisters do) he shouldn't feel less adequate.
        That is the key.Directly or indirectly.

        But I would suggest marrying somebody on your own level...

        Going to extremes might be harmful in long run.

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        • #5
          Re: If the wife already earns for herself

          If you are bothered by her earnings and you feel inadequate perhaps look for someone who does not work. Or even better go back home.

          If anything it should be a bonus and her money is her money .
          "Try to distance yourself from everything that causes you worry and sadness, so that you may always live with peace of mind and an open and tranquil heart, seeking Allah and His worship and working on your worldly and otherworldly matters, for if you try this, you will find rest.

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