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Do you attend Mixed Weddings?

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  • Do you attend Mixed Weddings?

    It's that time of the year when all the wedding invitations come pouring in. From my experience, nearly all of these invitations are not segregated weddings. Our family policy states that we do not attend any unislamic weddings of this kind. In the past some relatives became upset with us and gave us silent treatment because we did not attend lol. Do you attend mixed weddings?
    33
    Yes
    42.42%
    14
    No
    57.58%
    19
    Know that the life of this world is but amusement and diversion and adornment and boasting to one another and competition in increase of wealth and children...

    -Quran (57:20)

  • #2
    Re: Do you attend Mixed Weddings?

    I ignore it as much as I can but knowing that, I am married now I may be invited to mixed weddings & will have to attend those with my hubby! :(

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    • #3
      Re: Do you attend Mixed Weddings?

      Generally I don't like weddings and hope I don't get invited, but if I do then I attend but try to stay away from the ladies, normally the mixed weddings around here have men and women sitting in different half of the hall, like men right, ladies left. But later on after the meals they mix anyway, then I now my time is up.
      banans in pajamas are coming down the stairs
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      • #4
        Re: Do you attend Mixed Weddings?

        Me to go alone not with family, meet Groom wish him.

        i am not gonna mixed with mixed marriages

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        • #5
          Re: Do you attend Mixed Weddings?

          I only went to one wedding in my life and it was mixed; And one week later I ended up fighting with the in-laws of my friend's brother. No need to say how the marriage ended up.

          As for the mixing well, nothing special (i thought it was normal at the time), and with the families, i dont think there could be any place for any fitnah
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          • #6
            Re: Do you attend Mixed Weddings?

            Yes we go sometimes. I don't see anything problematic tending to be happening in these weddings. We would sit in a mixed table with family together, and don't end up speaking to any strange men anyway just keep to ourselves.
            Only rarely have I ever gone to a mixed wedding and found they have all extra stuff like inappropriate dancing etc (that time just stayed on our own table talking to others who werent participating in that) normally although its mixed its just normal nothing overly fitnahfied..
            .: Rufaida :.
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            • #7
              Re: Do you attend Mixed Weddings?

              I've been to so many mixed weddings.

              I've never seen any problem. Families keep to themselves.

              No dancing and no other rubbish.

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              • #8
                Re: Do you attend Mixed Weddings?

                Originally posted by sushi View Post
                I ignore it as much as I can but knowing that, I am married now I may be invited to mixed weddings & will have to attend those with my hubby! :(
                no you don't, you have to forbid them even if it displeases your husband as otherwise you will displease Allaah.
                Abu Saalehah

                OUTREACH4ISLAM - Calling the not yet Muslims of Leicester to Islam since 2006

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                • #9
                  Re: Do you attend Mixed Weddings?

                  Originally posted by shockwave View Post
                  I've been to so many mixed weddings.

                  I've never seen any problem. Families keep to themselves.

                  No dancing and no other rubbish.
                  because it is forbidden in the deen of islam, thats quite a big major problem.
                  Abu Saalehah

                  OUTREACH4ISLAM - Calling the not yet Muslims of Leicester to Islam since 2006

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                  • #10
                    Re: Do you attend Mixed Weddings?

                    Holding wedding party in a club with each family sitting at a separate table


                    I have signed a marriage contract with a good sister months ago. We discussed about the day of the actual marriage. I suggested separating men from women this day, and she suggested to have the celebration in the garden of a club, in an opened place, as every family will have a separate table, then we serve food to them on every table. There will be only nasheeds playing not music. Does this transgress the rulings of sharee’ah. What do you advise us to do? May Allaah bless you


                    Praise be to Allaah.

                    Mixing of men and women leads to bad consequences and negative effects, whether that is at wedding parties, at work or in school. This has been discussed in the answer to question no. 1200.

                    Having each family sitting at a separate table does not prevent this mixing when people come in and go out, as it does not prevent them looking at one another and so on, especially if there are among these families people who do not observe proper hijab, and evil consequences occur as a result.

                    Moreover, if each family sits by itself, that does not achieve the purpose of celebration and spreading happiness and joy, and letting people get to know one another and make friends with one another.

                    Hence we advise you to hold the celebration as you initially suggested, in a place where men and women can be separated. This is more fearing of Allaah and is more likely to achieve the aims of the gathering.

                    We ask Allaah to bless you and to bring you together in goodness, obedience and righteousness.

                    And Allaah knows best.


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                    Know that the life of this world is but amusement and diversion and adornment and boasting to one another and competition in increase of wealth and children...

                    -Quran (57:20)

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                    • #11
                      Re: Do you attend Mixed Weddings?

                      LOL evil consequences

                      OH NO.

                      THE EVILS WILL TAKE OVER

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                      • #12
                        Re: Do you attend Mixed Weddings?

                        If you find it to be haram, then what is the point of this thread? Asking others to expose their sins (if the wedding was haram) isn't something a Muslim should do. It would have been better if you simply posted what islamQA said and made that your thread.
                        مَّن ذَا الَّذِي يُقْرِضُ اللّهَ قَرْضًا حَسَنًا فَيُضَاعِفَهُ لَهُ أَضْعَافًا كَثِيرَةً وَاللّهُ يَقْبِضُ وَيَبْسُطُ وَإِلَيْهِ تُرْجَعُونَ

                        "Who is he that will loan to Allah a beautiful loan, which Allah will double unto his credit and multiply many times?
                        It is Allah that giveth (you) Want or plenty, and to Him shall be your return."
                        Surah al-Baqarah
                        [2:245]

                        .:.
                        .:. Perfer et Obdura : Dolor Hic Tibi Proderit Olim .:.
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                        .:.
                        ...said the spider to the fly...

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                        • #13
                          Re: Do you attend Mixed Weddings?

                          I don't. I know one brother who I like very much, and he married a fourth wife. I wanted to go to his wedding to show my support, but it was mixed, so I did not go.

                          I hope my future in-laws don't fight me over this. My brother went through heck in his wedding over this issue and the issue of music. At one point he was holed up in a room with the man playing the anasheed and they had the door barred from women who wanted to put songs on who were banging on it and sending messages with kids. The one man at the anasheed actually ran away, but another man in the room stepped forth and said he'd man the deck.

                          At the end of it all though, after all the fussing, and all the complaints. Everyone was happy, everyone. When one displeases Allah to please the people, they will be displeased with him regardless. But when he pleases Allah regardless of the people, they will eventually come to be pleased with him. So many times have I seen this in many situations with friends/relatives.
                          والمبادرة إلى التكفير إنما تغلب على طباع من يغلب عليهم الجهل - ابن تيمية رحمه الله - بغية المرتاد

                          "Rushing towards takfir is an attitude which is dominant over those who are defeated by ignorance." - Ibn Taymiyyah Rahimahullah [Bughyatul Murtaad, page 354]

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                          • #14
                            Re: Do you attend Mixed Weddings?

                            wow the majority actually said yes.

                            after what i've seen at these weddings i don't go. i promised myself i will never go to such weddings ever again - even if it's my own sister or brother getting married.

                            there are ways around it, you can send a gift or go see the bride/groom before or after the wedding.
                            "O you who have believed, shall I guide you to a transaction that will save you from a painful punishment?
                            (It is that) you believe in Allah and His Messenger and strive in the cause of Allah with your wealth and your lives. That is best for you, if you should know.
                            He will forgive for you your sins and admit you to gardens beneath which rivers flow and pleasant dwellings in gardens of perpetual residence. That is the great attainment"
                            .


                            "And (you will obtain) another (favour) that you love - victory from Allah and an imminent conquest; and give good tidings to the believers"
                            .

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                            • #15
                              Re: Do you attend Mixed Weddings?

                              :salams

                              How to politely tell your family that you don't want to go because it's a mixed wedding, especially if it's a wedding of a family member/close relatives? What's the ruling of not going to a wedding that you've been invited to? Also, what exactly does a mixed wedding referred to? I've been to some weddings where they have separate sections to eat, but then again male and female guests are still going to cross path one way or another when arriving/leaving the place, or when they greet the host. Is that considered to be a mixed wedding? :scratch:

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