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  • Flirting or socialising ??!

    Salam alaykom everyone,

    Sisters, if your husband or husband to be is talking and laughing with stranger girls/women at the bank, at a restaurant with the waitress or with other clients, at an administrative place with a worker, would that be ok ? Is that flirting or socialising or just rude? And all this happening in your presence? What would you or say? and if he has friends from the opposite sex on Facebook or any other social network, chatting to them every now and then, joking around with them ect.... What would you do?

    Brothers, if you are like these men, and your wife or wife to be tells you that she's not happy, what would you do or think ? And if she doesn't do anything or say anything, and she's ok with you behaving this way what would you think?

  • #2
    Re: Flirting or socialising ??!

    I would be ticked off majorely ticked that is just innaproproate behaviour and I would tell him so,,when it comes to this stuff I will be very vocal as I am very very jealous and I would not be afraid to let him know this wrong and has to stop,, or id have to kill him of course:mujahida:

    Comment


    • #3
      Re: Flirting or socialising ??!

      Originally posted by Muslimah3000 View Post
      Salam alaykom everyone,

      Sisters, if your husband or husband to be is talking and laughing with stranger girls/women at the bank, at a restaurant with the waitress or with other clients, at an administrative place with a worker, would that be ok ? Is that flirting or socialising or just rude? And all this happening in your presence? What would you or say? and if he has friends from the opposite sex on Facebook or any other social network, chatting to them every now and then, joking around with them ect.... What would you do?

      Brothers, if you are like these men, and your wife or wife to be tells you that she's not happy, what would you do or think ? And if she doesn't do anything or say anything, and she's ok with you behaving this way what would you think?
      :wswrwb:

      That is plain flirting. They are not his mahram, and I'm pretty from the way you put it in your OP the talking is not necessary at all, let alone the laughing. Definitely not allowed at all in my book.

      Comment


      • #4
        Re: Flirting or socialising ??!

        Originally posted by *Aisha View Post
        I would be ticked off majorely ticked that is just innaproproate behaviour and I would tell him so,,when it comes to this stuff I will be very vocal as I am very very jealous and I would not be afraid to let him know this wrong and has to stop,, or id have to kill him of course:mujahida:
        Lol I'm not even married yet but I'm already bursting with rage reading the OP :rotfl:

        Comment


        • #5
          Re: Flirting or socialising ??!

          Originally posted by geeksupremo View Post
          :wswrwb:

          That is plain flirting. They are not his mahram, and I'm pretty from the way you put it in your OP the talking is not necessary at all, let alone the laughing. Definitely not allowed at all in my book.
          What would you do if that happens to you?
          In that right moment

          Comment


          • #6
            Re: Flirting or socialising ??!

            Originally posted by *Aisha View Post
            I would be ticked off majorely ticked that is just innaproproate behaviour and I would tell him so,,when it comes to this stuff I will be very vocal as I am very very jealous and I would not be afraid to let him know this wrong and has to stop,, or id have to kill him of course:mujahida:
            Seriously!! What would you say to him? Would you react at that moment or
            wait till you go home??

            Comment


            • #7
              Re: Flirting or socialising ??!

              Originally posted by geeksupremo View Post
              Lol I'm not even married yet but I'm already bursting with rage reading the OP :rotfl:
              loool it makes me ticked off just thinking of it wallah,,I am too much jealous for this stuff. wallah if I saw him do that I would get his hand and dig my nails into him or stomp on his foot and give him the look of death is coming to you hhhhahaha then in the car start yelling like ive never yelled before.
              Last edited by *aisha*; 24-07-12, 11:31 PM.

              Comment


              • #8
                Re: Flirting or socialising ??!

                Originally posted by Muslimah3000 View Post
                Seriously!! What would you say to him? Would you react at that moment or
                wait till you go home??
                Yas usualy im a very quiet go with the flow girl I dont say anything to him at all but this what you say no no never I would say something right then and there read my other post as that is what I would do to him.

                Comment


                • #9
                  Re: Flirting or socialising ??!

                  Originally posted by Muslimah3000 View Post
                  What would you do if that happens to you?
                  In that right moment
                  I'd definitely interrupt them, make some serious and life threatening eye contacts with my husband... I'm not good at shouting and screaming, so I'd probably take him somewhere private and talk to him about it. I don't know how I'd do in this kind of situation honestly, am not married, no experience at all. And I'm just too mad right now to think straight :rotfl:

                  Originally posted by *Aisha View Post
                  loool it makes me ticked off just thinking of it wallah,,I am too much jealous for this stuff. wallah if I saw him do that I would get his hand and dig my nails into him or stomp on his foot and give him the look of death is coming to you hhhhahaha then in the car start yelling like ive never yelled before.
                  You go girl! Sometimes I almost feel bad for whoever that will marry me inshaAllah because I'm a very jealous person lol.

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    Re: Flirting or socialising ??!

                    Originally posted by Muslimah3000 View Post
                    Salam alaykom everyone,

                    Sisters, if your husband or husband to be is talking and laughing with stranger girls/women at the bank, at a restaurant with the waitress or with other clients, at an administrative place with a worker, would that be ok ? Is that flirting or socialising or just rude?
                    If he's talking to the bank teller...that might be because she's helping him with his bank account. The waitress is getting him food. And his worker is someone who works under him. If they are talking, because of this then I don't see where the jealousy would come from. And if she makes a funny joke and he laughs, is it that big of a deal? Funny jokes are funny. It happens.

                    There is a difference between flirting and dealing with someone. If it's flirting, then this is haram and he should be told to fear Allah, especially if it's done in front of the wife. This is someone who lacks adab and common sense. If it's the latter, then as long as it doesn't overstep the limits and becomes flirting then there is no problem with this. Plus, some brothers and sisters always smile and look like they're thinking of something funny. If your husband/wife is like this, then I don't think you can fault them.

                    So it depends on the situation.
                    مَّن ذَا الَّذِي يُقْرِضُ اللّهَ قَرْضًا حَسَنًا فَيُضَاعِفَهُ لَهُ أَضْعَافًا كَثِيرَةً وَاللّهُ يَقْبِضُ وَيَبْسُطُ وَإِلَيْهِ تُرْجَعُونَ

                    "Who is he that will loan to Allah a beautiful loan, which Allah will double unto his credit and multiply many times?
                    It is Allah that giveth (you) Want or plenty, and to Him shall be your return."
                    Surah al-Baqarah
                    [2:245]

                    .:.
                    .:. Perfer et Obdura : Dolor Hic Tibi Proderit Olim .:.
                    Be patient and strong : someday this pain will be useful to you

                    .:.
                    ...said the spider to the fly...

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      Re: Flirting or socialising ??!

                      Originally posted by Pippin1376 View Post
                      If he's talking to the bank teller...that might be because she's helping him with his bank account. The waitress is getting him food. And his worker is someone who works under him. If they are talking, because of this then I don't see where the jealousy would come from. And if she makes a funny joke and he laughs, is it that big of a deal? Funny jokes are funny. It happens.

                      There is a difference between flirting and dealing with someone. If it's flirting, then this is haram and he should be told to fear Allah, especially if it's done in front of the wife. This is someone who lacks adab and common sense. If it's the latter, then as long as it doesn't overstep the limits and becomes flirting then there is no problem with this. Plus, some brothers and sisters always smile and look like they're thinking of something funny. If your husband/wife is like this, then I don't think you can fault them.

                      So it depends on the situation.
                      How can you tell if he's flirting?

                      Comment


                      • #12
                        Re: Flirting or socialising ??!

                        :wswrwb:

                        Totallllyyyyyyyyy inappropriate behaviour as sis *Aisha said. Ask him how he'd feel if u talked and joked around with non-mahram Males and chatted to them on Facebook or whatever!!!
                        إن للمتقين مفازا

                        Comment


                        • #13
                          Re: Flirting or socialising ??!

                          Originally posted by Muslimah3000 View Post
                          How can you tell if he's flirting?
                          You can tell and it depends from person to person. If he's your husband, you'll know whether or not if he's flirting, being himself, or just answering questions.
                          مَّن ذَا الَّذِي يُقْرِضُ اللّهَ قَرْضًا حَسَنًا فَيُضَاعِفَهُ لَهُ أَضْعَافًا كَثِيرَةً وَاللّهُ يَقْبِضُ وَيَبْسُطُ وَإِلَيْهِ تُرْجَعُونَ

                          "Who is he that will loan to Allah a beautiful loan, which Allah will double unto his credit and multiply many times?
                          It is Allah that giveth (you) Want or plenty, and to Him shall be your return."
                          Surah al-Baqarah
                          [2:245]

                          .:.
                          .:. Perfer et Obdura : Dolor Hic Tibi Proderit Olim .:.
                          Be patient and strong : someday this pain will be useful to you

                          .:.
                          ...said the spider to the fly...

                          Comment


                          • #14
                            Re: Flirting or socialising ??!

                            Originally posted by Muslimah3000 View Post
                            How can you tell if he's flirting?
                            Trust me you'd know he'd start acting different and you'd be able to tell by body language and his facial expression. Me and my husband never talk to the opposite sex I have too much gheerah for my husband.
                            ▪️••• 〰 Say what you wish in abuse of me, for my silence towards the idiot is indeed an answer. I am not at a loss for a response, but rather it does not befit the lion to answer the dogs. 〰 •••▪️

                            ~ IMAM SHAFI'I RH

                            Comment


                            • #15
                              Re: Flirting or socialising ??!

                              lol.
                              I would be so mad. First off, if it was in my presence, I would just stare at him and stay quiet the entire time. He'll know something is wrong.
                              I'm thankful my husband does not have friends that are females or social networks like facebook. But if he mentions any females, I would get jealous and study his facial expressions and the way he talks about the person lol.
                              I guess it's partially because it's possible he could feel some way about her inside and I wouldn't know. He is a man and there are plenty of females out there that are very pretty. So if he mentions any females, I guess I get very interested in his stories because if there's a chance that he has something for her I'll know. Even if it's his old school mates lol. I love hearing those stories because they're just soooo interesting lol.

                              Before we got married I had facebook, and he didn't like the fact that I had male friends on it. Even though they were all only friends and I wouldn't even talk to them. But I was fine with that. I don't mind.

                              Comment

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