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Salam...I need your prayers urgently....

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  • Salam...I need your prayers urgently....

    My life is full of so many negative memories but i managed to pull through all of them. After praying severally to Allah,i recently met someone i felt safe been with. He introduced me to his family and they gladly accepted me. The problem is my parents are refusing to even meet this guy just because they think i will be moving out of the ahmadi sect.(I strongly do not believe in sects....i just prefer being called a muslim). I thought involving our parents will put us right morally since they will chaperon our relationship. Im so tired of all the bad things that happen to me and still wonder what my life is supposed to be about, cos i do not see the point. Everything i do ends up bad. It makes me wonder if i have committed any major sin. and if that's the case, how to i ask Allah for forgiveness cos i don't think i have it in me to face another bad event. I am begininng to think ALLAH does not listento my prayers. Please make dua for me for ALLAH (SWT) to at least open my parents hearts so they will get to know him before they give their judgement. Thank you.

  • #2
    Re: Salam...I need your prayers urgently....

    :salams

    ahmedi sect......

    Well first be a Muslim that Follows the Qur'an and Sunnah of the Prophet SAW

    Is this guy Muslim(Sunni)? Are you looking into marriage?

    Somebody or you need to aware me on the basics of what Ahmedi's believe.

    May Allah guide you and your family to the right path. Ameen
    "O friend, the cloth from which your burial shroud will be cut may have already reached the market and you remain unaware." Imam al-Ghazali R.A.

    GOOD MANNERS

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    • #3
      Re: Salam...I need your prayers urgently....

      You have my dua.

      I think that your parents have legitimate fears, as once you are married to a Muslim you will come to see that there are several beliefs held by "Ahmadi's" that are very difficult to square with Quran and Sunnah.

      I have second hand knowledge of "Ahmadis" being excluded from Ahmadi Mosques and similar ostracisation because they or their children have married non-Ahmadis.

      It is important to remember that just because Allah is not answering your prayers in the way you want (prayer and dua are not a free shopping list) it does not mean he doesn't listen nor is not answering your prayers.

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      • #4
        Re: Salam...I need your prayers urgently....

        :salams

        You said you don't follow any sect, so I'm guessing you are not an Ahmedi?

        But, what do you follow? Where do you get your knowledge about Islam from?
        Secure few moments, everyday, to reflect upon the innumerable blessings of Allah and thank Him for bestowing them upon you.

        "A person who is blessed with the ability to be grateful, shall never be deprived of barakah and increase in blessings."
        - Rasulullah (صلی اللہ علیہ وسلم)‎

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        • #5
          Re: Salam...I need your prayers urgently....

          Salaam,

          I have a few friends that are ahmadi, and from what I have seen most people do not consider them Muslims (they're banned in Pakistan, and the followers have had a lot of negative repercussions in Pakistan). If you do become a Sunni (leaving the ahmadi, if you are ahmadi) you will instantly see change in your life...IMO. And I second what brother mirror asked, where do you get your knowledge from?
          "Knowing what you don’t know is more useful than being brilliant.”
          -Charlie Munger
          "It seems that we're better at finding someone to blame for our problems than we are at finding creative solutions to fix them.”
          -Neil deGrasse Tyson

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          • #6
            Re: Salam...I need your prayers urgently....

            Bluesnowman and mirror.....i get my knowledge on islam from, what i was taught growing up, islamic books, mosques and also from the numerous non-ahmadi friends i have.

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            • #7
              Re: Salam...I need your prayers urgently....

              So, you are not a Ahmedi yourself?
              Secure few moments, everyday, to reflect upon the innumerable blessings of Allah and thank Him for bestowing them upon you.

              "A person who is blessed with the ability to be grateful, shall never be deprived of barakah and increase in blessings."
              - Rasulullah (صلی اللہ علیہ وسلم)‎

              Comment


              • #8
                Re: Salam...I need your prayers urgently....

                I used to be an Ahmadi. I am a male so your situation might vary. It will be hard I tell you.

                If you marry a non-Ahmadi while being an Ahmadi, then definitely you will be banished. If your parents happen to arrange your wedding or assist in any manner, then they will be banished as well. So you should expect a lot of pressure involving emotional appeal. You might also be told that they've seen cases where people end up regretting marrying out of community.

                You can expect some contact with not so religious Ahmadis but it won't be acknowledged in Ahmadi gatherings. I mean to say that they won't be acknowledging you in their Ahmadi gathering.

                Another psychological point you should keep in mind also that the first two years of marriage are considered the hardest years of marriage. In case of marriage, Asian parents usually don't want the marriage to break unless there is physical abuse. They go to the last straw to save a marriage. But in such a case, they might be eager or you won't have get much elderly support.

                Culturally things are not so different for regular people like us. Adjustment is fairly easy. I mean the despised "Mullah" is not that bad and Muslims in general are good people. Muslims have their activities in Mosques also and concerned with their children education as well.

                I would suggest that you first look into whether you wish to become a Muslim. If you feel satisfied, then change your faith. By Ahmadiyya rules, they cannot stop you from doing that. There would be some talk as is typical in our culture but ignore it for sometime (~2 months). After that time, you decide to marry. Since you are out of the community, they won't take any measures against you or your parents. Your parents can arrange for your wedding, functions and it won't bring any banishment. Then you are basically a family member and "silla rahmi" should be shown instead of ostracism. This way your family can keep in touch with you as well.

                In brief, it would be unwise to marry while being an Ahmadi since it would bring trouble to you and your family members as well. Decide you wish to become a Muslim. Come out of Ahmadiyya faith and then marry expecting that parental support in first years would be minimal. This way you'll avoid any trouble to you or your parents.

                One final note...you mentioned that you've suffered much in life. Any person who might have suffered or suffering is vulnerable to manipulative people. Take caution that you're not being taken advantage of. One way to find out about it is to see if the mentioned person keeps his commitments with other people, on the job etc and signs of sudden temper or lack of self-control are not there. Otherwise you could fall in with an abusive person.
                Last edited by reality; 07-06-12, 01:33 AM.

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                • #9
                  Re: Salam...I need your prayers urgently....

                  Originally posted by litababy View Post
                  My life is full of so many negative memories but i managed to pull through all of them. After praying severally to Allah,i recently met someone i felt safe been with. He introduced me to his family and they gladly accepted me. The problem is my parents are refusing to even meet this guy just because they think i will be moving out of the ahmadi sect.(I strongly do not believe in sects....i just prefer being called a muslim). I thought involving our parents will put us right morally since they will chaperon our relationship. Im so tired of all the bad things that happen to me and still wonder what my life is supposed to be about, cos i do not see the point. Everything i do ends up bad. It makes me wonder if i have committed any major sin. and if that's the case, how to i ask Allah for forgiveness cos i don't think i have it in me to face another bad event. I am begininng to think ALLAH does not listento my prayers. Please make dua for me for ALLAH (SWT) to at least open my parents hearts so they will get to know him before they give their judgement. Thank you.

                  may Allah (swt) answer all your prayers, and make it so you are both happily together, able to marry each other isA
                  DO NOT PRIVATE MESSAGE IF YOU DON'T KNOW ME.

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