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What should a woman be doing while older kids are at school?

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  • #16
    Re: What should a woman be doing while older kids are at school?

    Originally posted by naila-k View Post
    A salaam alaykum, in an attempt to get this forum back to normal, I thought I'd make a marriage topic, inspired by the wright stuff this morning.

    What should a woman be doing while older kids are at school?

    I am talking high school age.

    If there is a woman who doesn't not work ( by work I include paid, unpaid, volunteer, charity, PTA, halaqahs etc) or study, does this make her lazy? If she irons her sheets does that mean she has too much time? ( no offence ze) . Should we all make our days as productive as possible and what does productive mean?
    :wswrwb:

    Lol i actually saw that today!

    I dont think a stay at home mum is lazy! How can you be lazy when you have all the housework and stuff to do?..
    Having said that, it doesnt take all day either. What you do with your time after you have done everything is important. Sitting at home and just staring at the four walls will drive you mad! I talk from experience! Lol

    It was affecting me mentally and the way i was with my kids.

    So what i did was start a few classes...it was just a couple of hours for three days a week....One day i'd go to an aerobic class, sugar craft on another and then a halaqa on a Friday. Alhumdulillah, now im in a much better place, mentally. :)
    "Innalilahi wa inna ilayhi rajioon" To Allah we belong and to Him we shall return." (Quran Surat Al Baqarah 2:156)
    "Every soul shall have a taste of death, then to us you will be ultimately returned." (Quran Surat Al Ankaboot 29:57)

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    • #17
      Re: What should a woman be doing while older kids are at school?

      Originally posted by naila-k View Post
      A salaam alaykum, in an attempt to get this forum back to normal, I thought I'd make a marriage topic, inspired by the wright stuff this morning.

      What should a woman be doing while older kids are at school?

      I am talking high school age.

      If there is a woman who doesn't not work ( by work I include paid, unpaid, volunteer, charity, PTA, halaqahs etc) or study, does this make her lazy? If she irons her sheets does that mean she has too much time? ( no offence ze) . Should we all make our days as productive as possible and what does productive mean?
      Wa Aalaikum Assalam


      There's tons to do!

      Learn Arabic, memorize qur'an, learn some of the islamic sciences.

      Take a short breather, then continue giving dawah, phone sisters and converse with them to build relationships, talk to relatives to maintain silaat-ar-rahm.

      This is enough stuff to fill an entire day easily =).
      If you have any questions feel free to PM me!

      Humililty, Sincerity, and the quest for Truth. There is no purpose in life but to seek the pleasure of Allah.
      There is a possibility a female might use this account to read something!

      Comment


      • #18
        Re: What should a woman be doing while older kids are at school?

        lol the question was if you dont do that stuff are you lazy?

        Recipes for all the family :inlove:
        (and you thought I was a lazy feminazi which can't cook?)

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        • #19
          Re: What should a woman be doing while older kids are at school?

          Originally posted by naila-k View Post
          lol the question was if you dont do that stuff are you lazy?
          I'd say not.

          People are different, some people are very good with time managment, and can do more things etc.

          I think maybe my reply was the one that took it a bit off - topic

          I think people are not, but you have to keep pushing to better yourself.

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          • #20
            Re: What should a woman be doing while older kids are at school?

            Do the best thing in the world: sleep
            make up for the sleepless night you had all the years before

            The whole concept of not getting involved is becoming an issue now-adays because peopel are isolated. We have converts/reverts without family link, we have people moving to different country without family support..etc all this leaves women mostly (man always have masjid and work place to bond with people) but women lose out.

            Back in the days when my mom was growing up or grandma, there was no need to go out and make friends. Each family had dozen kids and 100 cousins. Everyone lived next door to eachother, hence female member of the family had no need or desire to go out to meed random stranger. Family was enough. NOw with family far apart, the old concept of staying put is not working.

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            • #21
              Re: What should a woman be doing while older kids are at school?

              Originally posted by naila-k View Post
              A salaam alaykum, in an attempt to get this forum back to normal, I thought I'd make a marriage topic, inspired by the wright stuff this morning.

              What should a woman be doing while older kids are at school?

              I am talking high school age.

              If there is a woman who doesn't not work ( by work I include paid, unpaid, volunteer, charity, PTA, halaqahs etc) or study, does this make her lazy? If she irons her sheets does that mean she has too much time? ( no offence ze) . Should we all make our days as productive as possible and what does productive mean?
              Originally posted by naila-k View Post
              lol the question was if you dont do that stuff are you lazy?
              :wswrwb:

              If she doesn't know at least the basics of Qur'aan (i.e. tajweed as we seem to neglect this but memorise Suwar for Salaah incorrectly), Aqeedah, Fiqh, Seerah and the like... then yes, I think that would make her lazy where she has time and still doesn't do any of this.

              As for the bold, I think of productivity as using most of your free time (Mum's have more responsibility than others, there lives revolve around their families, so their free time is beyond these obligations and of course the obligations to Allah as a Muslim) in a way that is directly or indirectly leading to bettering yourself as a Muslim - the fact its vague is good. I mean, feeding your children to cleaning the floor, to memorising Quran, to going over your Arabic vocab, to keeping healthy by exercising are all productive things to be doing... its the balance that's important.

              Also... we should remember that when we don't use our brains regularly, things become harder for us to learn.
              Ya Muqallib al-Quloob, thabbit qalbi 'alaa Deenik
              O' Converter of Hearts, make my heart steadfast upon Thy Way
              We can easily forgive a child who is afraid of the dark; the real tragedy of life is when men are afraid of the light.

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              • #22
                Re: What should a woman be doing while older kids are at school?

                Originally posted by naila-k View Post
                inspired by the wright stuff this morning.
                Gosh, I hate that show.

                Every time they do anything on Islam its always shockingly ignorant and prejudiced. But I guess that's what you should expect from their 'expert' panels comprised of 'know nothing' morons.

                And always banging on about gay rights. Clearly in denial and just going with the current trend when you can see that deep down they think its nasty too.

                Sorry to go off on a tangent. Rant over.
                Allah will ask on the Day of Judgment: “Where are those who loved each other for the sake of My glory? Today, on a day when there is no shade but Mine, I shall shade them with My shade.”(Muslim)

                "Zendagi Migzara..."

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                • #23
                  Re: What should a woman be doing while older kids are at school?

                  Originally posted by NGE View Post
                  Gosh, I hate that show.

                  Every time they do anything on Islam its always shockingly ignorant and prejudiced. But I guess that's what you should expect from their 'expert' panels comprised of 'know nothing' morons.

                  And always banging on about gay rights. Clearly in denial and just going with the current trend when you can see that deep down they think its nasty too.

                  Sorry to go off on a tangent. Rant over.

                  I dont know the above, but the big questions on BBC , sounds exactly the same.

                  When the kuffar are discussing something, if you are doing the opposite, then 99% of the time, you in the right. Thats my logic.

                  Comment


                  • #24
                    Re: What should a woman be doing while older kids are at school?

                    Oh man, don't get me started on BBC's big questions. I could write an essay on that one. But I'd rather just do a WWF elbow drop on all the monkeys who make that trash.
                    Allah will ask on the Day of Judgment: “Where are those who loved each other for the sake of My glory? Today, on a day when there is no shade but Mine, I shall shade them with My shade.”(Muslim)

                    "Zendagi Migzara..."

                    Comment


                    • #25
                      Re: What should a woman be doing while older kids are at school?

                      Originally posted by NGE View Post
                      Oh man, don't get me started on BBC's big questions. I could write an essay on that one. But I'd rather just do a WWF elbow drop on all the monkeys who make that trash.
                      lol. SubahanAllah, the program makes me cringe.

                      Topics + biased presenter + 10 jews in the studio + joke muslim attendees.

                      Comment


                      • #26
                        Re: What should a woman be doing while older kids are at school?

                        She should do something that will benefit herself and/or her family. Many of these small chores such as keeping the house clean etc are taken for granted by the family but actually are one of the most important things only missed when they are not done. Maybe she could learn the deen. Even if for just 30 Minutes a day. It really adds up. Just make sure your learning it from authentic sources. You can buy a book, read things online or watch a lecture. After a while the knowledge will really start coming in beithnillah!

                        A women is not lazy if she does not work aslong as she is using that time she has productively for her/her family and not throwing away day after day by doing nothing or just sitting in front of the TV or just aimlessly surfing the web.

                        Thats just my view on it.

                        Comment


                        • #27
                          Re: What should a woman be doing while older kids are at school?

                          Asalamu alaikum,

                          Wow...I can think of tonnes of things to do (ironing sheets will never be on my list for sure!)
                          - volunteer at an orphanage
                          -help elderly ppl do groceries etc
                          - take care of a kitchen garden
                          - plan activities to do as a family...high school kids need attention to...camping trips etc
                          - sisters groups at masjids
                          - and aim to perfect your deen...until you die

                          such a coincidence that you made this thread...a recently widowed muslimah was talking to me about this yesterday. She devoted the last five years or so to her ailing husband,and now that he has passed (Inna lillahi wa inna ilayhi raji'oon), and her children are all grown,she has now found herself feeling empty. After we spoke, she now has a plan...to attend classes at a masjid and join a charity group. She even decided to host a dhikr group every Thursday. MashAllah, alhamdulillah.

                          I could never just sit around and vegetate and I would not want this for any muslim sister...we have to account for every minute...use them wisely.

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                          • #28
                            Re: What should a woman be doing while older kids are at school?

                            perfecting skills at making something and then starting a small home business where you sell those somethings?
                            going to classes-islamic/sports/self-defense/crafts/etc.

                            Comment


                            • #29
                              Re: What should a woman be doing while older kids are at school?

                              whatever you do, just don't become a cat lady or a hoarder -_-
                              Fabi-ayyiala -i rabbikuma tukaththibani
                              Then which of the favors of your Lord will ye deny?
                              http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vr8DR8frP_s

                              You are not here just to fill space or to be a background character in someone else's movie. Consider this: nothing would be the same if you did not exist. Every place you have ever been and everyone you have ever spoken to would be different without you. We are all connected, and we are all affected by the decisions and even the existence of those around us.

                              Comment


                              • #30
                                Re: What should a woman be doing while older kids are at school?

                                Originally posted by naila-k View Post
                                A salaam alaykum, in an attempt to get this forum back to normal, I thought I'd make a marriage topic, inspired by the wright stuff this morning.

                                What should a woman be doing while older kids are at school?

                                I am talking high school age.

                                If there is a woman who doesn't not work ( by work I include paid, unpaid, volunteer, charity, PTA, halaqahs etc) or study, does this make her lazy? If she irons her sheets does that mean she has too much time? ( no offence ze) . Should we all make our days as productive as possible and what does productive mean?
                                If there is a woman who works outside of her home does this make her depressed because she doing 2 things, one that a man is responible for and another work at home to please Allaah (no offence) @)

                                and please tell me why a men should help inside the household (which you mentioned in several post)if woman has nothing to do in the house.

                                and if woman stay home even if she has nothing to do in her house other than the basic things and trying to become closer to Allaah and fear fitnah of the outside should we think of her being lazy?
                                ☝🏻️اللهمَّ لك الحمد حتى ترضى، ولك الحمد إذا رضيت، ولك الحمد بعد الرضا

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