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Valid Reasons for rejecting a marriage proposal

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  • Valid Reasons for rejecting a marriage proposal

    Salaams

    My dad's brother made a proposal for me to marry his son this was a while ago ( he is married to someone else now). Anyway when I spoke to my uncle and told him I was not ready for marriage he said, I should marry his son and bring him to the U.K and then divorce him. As you can imagine I was very angry about this as were my parents, who had told them already that I did not want to marry their son, but they wanted to hear it from me.

    Basically they were interested in my passport and nothing about me. I do not want to marry someone for this reason, I think this is a valid reason for rejecting a proposal and I have rejected another proposal for the exact same reason.

    What I wanted to know is if this is a valid reason for rejecting proposals, I know all proposals are not like this but I also know that I want to marry a deeni person not someone who is using me for the own gain.
    [B][FONT=Georgia]Serve Allah, as you would if you could see Him; although you cannot see Him, He can see you.[/FONT][/B]

  • #2
    Re: Valid Reasons for rejecting a marriage proposal

    of course it is a valid reason. Passport is not a reason to get married. Anyway you would end up divorced, or in a polygamy marriage. Do you need that? There's bunch of good, nice, muslim guys, don't worry ;) Everything is gonna be alright ;)

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    • #3
      Re: Valid Reasons for rejecting a marriage proposal

      Is not any reason a valid reason not to get married, if you don't want to get married to someone? Or just saying no, and give no reason... is that any less valid?

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      • #4
        Re: Valid Reasons for rejecting a marriage proposal

        Originally posted by bibi1986 View Post
        Salaams

        My dad's brother made a proposal for me to marry his son this was a while ago ( he is married to someone else now). Anyway when I spoke to my uncle and told him I was not ready for marriage he said, I should marry his son and bring him to the U.K and then divorce him. As you can imagine I was very angry about this as were my parents, who had told them already that I did not want to marry their son, but they wanted to hear it from me.

        Basically they were interested in my passport and nothing about me. I do not want to marry someone for this reason, I think this is a valid reason for rejecting a proposal and I have rejected another proposal for the exact same reason.

        What I wanted to know is if this is a valid reason for rejecting proposals, I know all proposals are not like this but I also know that I want to marry a deeni person not someone who is using me for the own gain.
        Thats awful, bet he doesnt have daughters because he wouldnt open his mouth that quickly to say you could divorce him. in islam you have a choice, so even if you didnt like the colour of his socks, thats your right
        My ♥ only lets الله‎ in
        ‘O Allah, forgive me, have mercy upon me, guide me, give me health and grant me sustenance.’
        “Once you are real you can't become unreal again. It lasts for always.”

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        • #5
          Re: Valid Reasons for rejecting a marriage proposal

          of course it's a valid reason hun. there's a lot that happens, such as the parents are convinced by their bros and sisters about thir nieces/nephews and the parents end up prioritizing the nieces and nephews over their own children. usually the nieces nd nephews know about this and are always in on the plot, just for a visa! it's a common thing you hear and sadly very wrong. the sad thing is that the nieces/nephews are of course using them and don't come clean when thy can do the right thing and find a way out, when they are just thinking, this is my ticket out of here. i've heard of this a lot.
          DO NOT PRIVATE MESSAGE IF YOU DON'T KNOW ME.

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          • #6
            Re: Valid Reasons for rejecting a marriage proposal

            :wswrwb:

            Sad to hear that an uncle would say that.
            Secure few moments, everyday, to reflect upon the innumerable blessings of Allah and thank Him for bestowing them upon you.

            "A person who is blessed with the ability to be grateful, shall never be deprived of barakah and increase in blessings."
            - Rasulullah (صلی اللہ علیہ وسلم)‎

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            • #7
              Re: Valid Reasons for rejecting a marriage proposal

              The person is just too good for you, almost feel like your not worth that person.. just know where I stand sometimes.. Even though they say they aren't, you know the reality. They have much more to offer you than you can offer them...
              La illaha ilallah

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              • #8
                Re: Valid Reasons for rejecting a marriage proposal

                do people like this still exist? hasn't this backward generation of pakistani's died out yet?

                He it is Who sends blessings on you, as do His angels, that He may bring you out from the depths of Darkness into Light: and He is Full of Mercy to the Believers. [Quran {33:43}]
                www.QuranicAudio.com
                www.Quran.com

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                • #9
                  Re: Valid Reasons for rejecting a marriage proposal

                  Originally posted by aadil77 View Post
                  do people like this still exist? hasn't this backward generation of pakistani's died out yet?
                  lol, well at least it is frank.
                  Classy I admit
                  My Blog http://historyeyesopened.tumblr.com/ Watch out sister Nousername
                  Ummah forum mentality depiction by BBC (warning) http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LS37SNYjg8w

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                  • #10
                    Re: Valid Reasons for rejecting a marriage proposal

                    Originally posted by aadil77 View Post
                    do people like this still exist? hasn't this backward generation of pakistani's died out yet?
                    Brother, please, have some respect.

                    Died out? I don't know if you're talking about our elders, but that's not a way to refer to anyone. Yes, they are ignorant, so instead of saying "backward generation" and "died out" let's make Dua'a for them :insha:
                    Secure few moments, everyday, to reflect upon the innumerable blessings of Allah and thank Him for bestowing them upon you.

                    "A person who is blessed with the ability to be grateful, shall never be deprived of barakah and increase in blessings."
                    - Rasulullah (صلی اللہ علیہ وسلم)‎

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      Re: Valid Reasons for rejecting a marriage proposal

                      Originally posted by bibi1986 View Post
                      Salaams

                      My dad's brother made a proposal for me to marry his son this was a while ago ( he is married to someone else now). Anyway when I spoke to my uncle and told him I was not ready for marriage he said, I should marry his son and bring him to the U.K and then divorce him. As you can imagine I was very angry about this as were my parents, who had told them already that I did not want to marry their son, but they wanted to hear it from me.

                      Basically they were interested in my passport and nothing about me. I do not want to marry someone for this reason, I think this is a valid reason for rejecting a proposal and I have rejected another proposal for the exact same reason.

                      What I wanted to know is if this is a valid reason for rejecting proposals, I know all proposals are not like this but I also know that I want to marry a deeni person not someone who is using me for the own gain.
                      :wswrwb: Ukthi,

                      :lahawla: Next time someone says such a thing to you, aks them why they think Nikkah one of the Strongest bonds/Contracts is mere play and amusement to them ...

                      May Allah ta'ala rectify their conduct and affairs,

                      We aren't permitted to marry someone with the Intention of Divorcing them anyway ...

                      such Devious activities practiced by Shia's are abhorred in Islam.

                      :jkk:
                      http://www.ilovepalestine.com/campai...imesinGaza.gif

                      "It does not befit the lion to answer the dogs."

                      – Imam al-Shafi’i (Rahimahullah)

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                      • #12
                        Re: Valid Reasons for rejecting a marriage proposal

                        Originally posted by Nashmya Imtiaz View Post
                        of course it's a valid reason hun. there's a lot that happens, such as the parents are convinced by their bros and sisters about thir nieces/nephews and the parents end up prioritizing the nieces and nephews over their own children. usually the nieces nd nephews know about this and are always in on the plot, just for a visa! it's a common thing you hear and sadly very wrong. the sad thing is that the nieces/nephews are of course using them and don't come clean when thy can do the right thing and find a way out, when they are just thinking, this is my ticket out of here. i've heard of this a lot.
                        Very true bro

                        Comment

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