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  • #16
    Re: Finances

    Originally posted by aadil77 View Post
    You can only have the nikah at the masjid as far as I'm aware

    For the dinner/reception I'm thinking book out a small restaurent for close family/friends,

    Anyone done this and how was segregation managed?
    you could do the nikkah in the masjid, and then u could have your walima a few days later having dinner at a freinds house, so all the men meet in one house, and all the women meet in your house, your female relatives can take care of everyone there. also supposed to sacrifice one sheep for marriage for walima if u can afford it, so try to do that with even a small sheep and u can serve the pepared meat for the walima food with rice.
    "O you who believe! Stand out firmly for justice, as witnesses to Allah, even as against yourselves, or your parents, or your kin, and whether it be (against) rich or poor: for Allah can best protect both. Follow not the lusts (of your hearts), lest you swerve, and if you distort (justice) or decline to do justice, verily Allah is well-acquainted with all that you do." [An-Nisa 4:135]

    The Prophet :saw: said:

    "Whosoever leaves off obedience and separates from the Jamaa'ah and dies, he dies a death of jaahiliyyah. Whoever fights under the banner of the blind, becoming angry for 'asabiyyah (nationalism/tribalism/partisanship) or calling to 'asabiyyah, or assisting 'asabiyyah, then dies, he dies a death of jaahiliyyah."

    muslim

    Narrated 'Abdullah:

    The Prophet, said, "Abusing a Muslim is Fusuq (evil doing) and killing him is Kufr (disbelief)." sahih bukhari


    "Creeping upon you is the diseases of those people before you: envy and hatred. And hatred is the thing that shaves. I do not say it shaves the hair but it shaves the religion!

    By the One in whose Hand is my soul, you will not enter paradise until you believe, and you will not believe until you love one another. Certainly, let me inform you of that which may establish such things: spread the greetings and peace among yourselves."

    [Recorded by Imam Ahmad and Al-Tirmidhi]

    Comment


    • #17
      Re: Finances

      JazakhAllah khair for all the replies

      Again regarding finances, if you're managing everything on your own how do you get the message across to the other family.

      What would the expectations be for mahr and gifts? Is mahr usually money or jewellery or both?

      He it is Who sends blessings on you, as do His angels, that He may bring you out from the depths of Darkness into Light: and He is Full of Mercy to the Believers. [Quran {33:43}]
      www.QuranicAudio.com
      www.Quran.com

      Comment


      • #18
        Re: Finances

        Originally posted by aadil77 View Post
        JazakhAllah khair for all the replies

        Again regarding finances, if you're managing everything on your own how do you get the message across to the other family.

        What would the expectations be for mahr and gifts? Is mahr usually money or jewellery or both?
        you should ask ur wifes wali what her mahr is, u dont have to give gifts jewellery etc. just pay her mahr ( whatever she asks for) and thats that insha Allah. more barakh in a marriage that is made easy, and with the price of gold just now, giving gold jewellery as gifts is just going to be a headache for the future , as zakat will be eligable on it each year and ur wife will have to find the money to pay for that.
        "O you who believe! Stand out firmly for justice, as witnesses to Allah, even as against yourselves, or your parents, or your kin, and whether it be (against) rich or poor: for Allah can best protect both. Follow not the lusts (of your hearts), lest you swerve, and if you distort (justice) or decline to do justice, verily Allah is well-acquainted with all that you do." [An-Nisa 4:135]

        The Prophet :saw: said:

        "Whosoever leaves off obedience and separates from the Jamaa'ah and dies, he dies a death of jaahiliyyah. Whoever fights under the banner of the blind, becoming angry for 'asabiyyah (nationalism/tribalism/partisanship) or calling to 'asabiyyah, or assisting 'asabiyyah, then dies, he dies a death of jaahiliyyah."

        muslim

        Narrated 'Abdullah:

        The Prophet, said, "Abusing a Muslim is Fusuq (evil doing) and killing him is Kufr (disbelief)." sahih bukhari


        "Creeping upon you is the diseases of those people before you: envy and hatred. And hatred is the thing that shaves. I do not say it shaves the hair but it shaves the religion!

        By the One in whose Hand is my soul, you will not enter paradise until you believe, and you will not believe until you love one another. Certainly, let me inform you of that which may establish such things: spread the greetings and peace among yourselves."

        [Recorded by Imam Ahmad and Al-Tirmidhi]

        Comment


        • #19
          Re: Finances

          Originally posted by *asiya* View Post
          you should ask ur wifes wali what her mahr is, u dont have to give gifts jewellery etc. just pay her mahr ( whatever she asks for) and thats that insha Allah. more barakh in a marriage that is made easy, and with the price of gold just now, giving gold jewellery as gifts is just going to be a headache for the future , as zakat will be eligable on it each year and ur wife will have to find the money to pay for that.
          I can't imagine not giving any jewellery, I'm not talking about the tonnes of freshy style jewellery that asians give away never to be worn again. I mean basics like ring, bracelet etc.

          Zakat is a non issue, its a blessing to be able to give zakat.

          How do you not give gifts? Sounds too cheap to me.

          He it is Who sends blessings on you, as do His angels, that He may bring you out from the depths of Darkness into Light: and He is Full of Mercy to the Believers. [Quran {33:43}]
          www.QuranicAudio.com
          www.Quran.com

          Comment


          • #20
            Re: Finances

            Originally posted by aadil77 View Post
            I can't imagine not giving any jewellery, I'm not talking about the tonnes of freshy style jewellery that asians give away never to be worn again. I mean basics like ring, bracelet etc.

            Zakat is a non issue, its a blessing to be able to give zakat.

            How do you not give gifts? Sounds too cheap to me.
            well its all up to u what u want to do, i was advising that cos i thought u had financial concerns.

            but in islam sunnah is, that you do the nikkah you give ur wife the mahr, and then youre married, one of the beauties of islam is that its not all about ur wedding day or jewellery or gifts its all about being married and the best part of the whole day is when u get to put ur hand on the forhead of ur bride and seek refuge in Allah and pray two rakats with her and thank Allah.
            "O you who believe! Stand out firmly for justice, as witnesses to Allah, even as against yourselves, or your parents, or your kin, and whether it be (against) rich or poor: for Allah can best protect both. Follow not the lusts (of your hearts), lest you swerve, and if you distort (justice) or decline to do justice, verily Allah is well-acquainted with all that you do." [An-Nisa 4:135]

            The Prophet :saw: said:

            "Whosoever leaves off obedience and separates from the Jamaa'ah and dies, he dies a death of jaahiliyyah. Whoever fights under the banner of the blind, becoming angry for 'asabiyyah (nationalism/tribalism/partisanship) or calling to 'asabiyyah, or assisting 'asabiyyah, then dies, he dies a death of jaahiliyyah."

            muslim

            Narrated 'Abdullah:

            The Prophet, said, "Abusing a Muslim is Fusuq (evil doing) and killing him is Kufr (disbelief)." sahih bukhari


            "Creeping upon you is the diseases of those people before you: envy and hatred. And hatred is the thing that shaves. I do not say it shaves the hair but it shaves the religion!

            By the One in whose Hand is my soul, you will not enter paradise until you believe, and you will not believe until you love one another. Certainly, let me inform you of that which may establish such things: spread the greetings and peace among yourselves."

            [Recorded by Imam Ahmad and Al-Tirmidhi]

            Comment


            • #21
              Re: Finances

              Originally posted by *asiya* View Post
              well its all up to u what u want to do, i was advising that cos i thought u had financial concerns.

              but in islam sunnah is, that you do the nikkah you give ur wife the mahr, and then youre married, one of the beauties of islam is that its not all about ur wedding day or jewellery or gifts its all about being married and the best part of the whole day is when u get to put ur hand on the forhead of ur bride and seek refuge in Allah and pray two rakats with her and thank Allah.
              BarakhAllah feekum for your input

              I do want to stick as much to the sunnah way as possible but also relevant to todays society, families are not of the imaan that used to be around those days - so we have to strike a balance.

              He it is Who sends blessings on you, as do His angels, that He may bring you out from the depths of Darkness into Light: and He is Full of Mercy to the Believers. [Quran {33:43}]
              www.QuranicAudio.com
              www.Quran.com

              Comment


              • #22
                Re: Finances

                i'd rather spend for the honeymoon too. but you will find a lot of cheap wedding deals. you can have one big day with the girl's side and just spend on the catering.
                DO NOT PRIVATE MESSAGE IF YOU DON'T KNOW ME.

                Comment

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