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Sisters - Is Ambition an Important Characteristic in a Guy?

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  • #31
    Re: Sisters - Is Ambition an Important Characteristic in a Guy?

    Originally posted by Sister_2009 View Post
    :wswrwb:

    Also, brother, you are very funny, have a great sense of humor, and that’s priceless.
    That is the truth:up:
    A woman appreciates a man who can make her laugh espeshly when shes sad:)
    Last edited by *aisha*; 05-12-11, 11:14 PM.

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    • #32
      Re: Sisters - Is Ambition an Important Characteristic in a Guy?

      salaams to all

      as others have mentioned
      what about deen?

      if someone has completed university & has a decent, stable job
      he is able to provide a decent life for his family
      then i think its defeating the purpose to have even more worldly ambitions

      our object of life as muslims is to bring 100% deen into our lives & make an effort to take this deen to the rest of the world

      thats where we should be channelling our ambitions & energies

      if someone does NOT YET have the necessities of life, like
      shelter
      wife
      means of transport
      a job/means of income

      then theres nothing wrong with having ambitions to fulfill these first
      but if u already have this & still have more worldly/material ambitions, thats not correct.

      unfortunately, when it comes to deen, most muslims are content to do very little
      but when it comes to dunya, they always want more & more
      and are prepared to exert themselves to attain/achieve this

      this is not what we were sent to the dunya for.
      otherwise, theres not much difference bet us & the kuffaar

      and allah ta'ala knows best
      jazakallah
      Sufyaan Thawri "Whoever is very popular with his relations and neighbours, we suspect him to be compromising in preaching the true teachings of religion."
      very good site for English bayaans in MP3 format-check it out- u wont be disappointed: http://www.musjidnoor.za.net/index.html & http://alhaadi.org.za/majlis-program...downloads.html

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      • #33
        Re: Sisters - Is Ambition an Important Characteristic in a Guy?

        jzk for all the replies, good to know theres sisters that think career ambition is as useless as i think it is

        dont compliment me tho - i get big headed

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        • #34
          Re: Sisters - Is Ambition an Important Characteristic in a Guy?

          Originally posted by msmoorad View Post
          salaams to all

          unfortunately, when it comes to deen, most muslims are content to do very little
          but when it comes to dunya, they always want more & more
          and are prepared to exert themselves to attain/achieve this

          this is not what we were sent to the dunya for.
          otherwise, theres not much difference bet us & the kuffaar

          and allah ta'ala knows best
          jazakallah
          this is a good point - i rarely see people with such drive and ambition for their career take that to deen and ambition for akhirah - im not saying it doesnt happen but it seems rare...we need to get our priorities straight

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          • #35
            Re: Sisters - Is Ambition an Important Characteristic in a Guy?

            depends what it's ambition to be................ ambition to be an evil despotic ruler is a definite no-no, but ambition to be an excellent Muslim in all ways is a definite yes-yes
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            • #36
              Re: Sisters - Is Ambition an Important Characteristic in a Guy?

              Originally posted by -Shamil- View Post
              this is a good point - i rarely see people with such drive and ambition for their career take that to deen and ambition for akhirah - im not saying it doesnt happen but it seems rare...we need to get our priorities straight
              Very true. Just imagine how we as an Ummah would be if we put that effort into our deen as we do to our careers. The rewards of striving for the deen come in the afterlife so this is why we struggle with this while striving when you strive in your career you're rewarded in this life. Even being balanced both in Dunya and Akhira would help but this is not the case for many of us.

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              • #37
                Re: Sisters - Is Ambition an Important Characteristic in a Guy?

                Originally posted by msmoorad View Post
                salaams to all

                as others have mentioned
                what about deen?

                if someone has completed university & has a decent, stable job
                he is able to provide a decent life for his family
                then i think its defeating the purpose to have even more worldly ambitions

                our object of life as muslims is to bring 100% deen into our lives & make an effort to take this deen to the rest of the world

                thats where we should be channelling our ambitions & energies

                if someone does NOT YET have the necessities of life, like
                shelter
                wife
                means of transport
                a job/means of income

                then theres nothing wrong with having ambitions to fulfill these first
                but if u already have this & still have more worldly/material ambitions, thats not correct.

                unfortunately, when it comes to deen, most muslims are content to do very little
                but when it comes to dunya, they always want more & more
                and are prepared to exert themselves to attain/achieve this

                this is not what we were sent to the dunya for.
                otherwise, theres not much difference bet us & the kuffaar

                and allah ta'ala knows best
                jazakallah
                Great post
                The life of this world is only the enjoyment of deception (a deceiving thing)” (3:185)

                Avoid excessive laughter and useless arguments as they harden the heart and lead to heedlessness.

                Comment


                • #38
                  Re: Sisters - Is Ambition an Important Characteristic in a Guy?

                  Ive realised Iv had this issue of lack of ambition with all potential partners apart from 1 - so is this really important for sisters? If so, whats so important about it. Money? Power? Its something I dont understand.
                  A lot of sisters will probably want to live a good life (not that there is anything wrong with that in terms of sharia, if the money's halal) but in general women desire a sense of security. They don't want to experience financial hardship. They may not want to be married to someone rich, but they don't want to suffer either. A person who doesn't seem to be doing all he could, shows he may falter in future when it comes to making ends meet.

                  It's the gift of contentment which leads to people not having a high wordly ambition.
                  -

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                  • #39
                    Re: Sisters - Is Ambition an Important Characteristic in a Guy?

                    Ambition is attractive, sure. I don't think making good money is useless. It can be a fitnah, but if you can handle it, it is very good to have extra money to invest in property or a business that not only provides financial security for the couple, but also the couple's children. And of course it can make thing like international travel easier. Also this enables more charity, or setting projects to facilitate continuous charity.

                    I also think it is more important for a man to be family orientated, not just career oriented. I would rather have a husband who is relaxed, content, and not stressed. Who actually has time and energy to be a good father. I wouldn't want some one who works 10+ everyday building his career just like I also wouldn't want someone who works 10+ hours a day because he didn't do anything to plan a career for himself and has to do long hours at minimum wage just to get by.
                    Last edited by inprogress; 06-12-11, 03:42 AM.
                    Blessed is He in Whose Hand is the Dominion, and He is Able to do all things. (67.1)

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                    • #40
                      Re: Sisters - Is Ambition an Important Characteristic in a Guy?

                      Is planning a career really that important, esp. for us Muslims?

                      I guess, short term planning is OK. As long as you have some sort of plan to feed your family and shelter them.
                      Secure few moments, everyday, to reflect upon the innumerable blessings of Allah and thank Him for bestowing them upon you.

                      "A person who is blessed with the ability to be grateful, shall never be deprived of barakah and increase in blessings."
                      - Rasulullah (صلی اللہ علیہ وسلم)‎

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                      • #41
                        Re: Sisters - Is Ambition an Important Characteristic in a Guy?

                        There are some people who work at menial jobs that they hate until they get old and feel ashamed of themselves because they have nothing to show for all their years working, not in financial gains, not in personal accomplishments, not in contributions to the community. So this is the situation most people would like to avoid not just because of a financial loss, but because it eats away at the man's self confidence, leading to other problems. It is not so much about career as it is dong something you will be fulfilled by and happy you spent a big chunk of your life doing.
                        Blessed is He in Whose Hand is the Dominion, and He is Able to do all things. (67.1)

                        Comment


                        • #42
                          Re: Sisters - Is Ambition an Important Characteristic in a Guy?

                          Originally posted by inprogress View Post
                          There are some people who work at menial jobs that they hate until they get old and feel ashamed of themselves because they have nothing to show for all their years working, not in financial gains, not in personal accomplishments, not in contributions to the community. So this is the situation most people would like to avoid not just because of a financial loss, but because it eats away at the man's self confidence, leading to other problems. It is not so much about career as it is dong something you will be fulfilled by and happy you spent a big chunk of your life doing.
                          Maybe, he was spending that chunk on deeni things. If he was, then he has a lot to show for, maybe not in this world, but certainly to Allah.

                          Like many people do the regular 9 to 5 deal, but they help out a lot in the masjid, or they might give lectures, do counselling, etc.
                          Secure few moments, everyday, to reflect upon the innumerable blessings of Allah and thank Him for bestowing them upon you.

                          "A person who is blessed with the ability to be grateful, shall never be deprived of barakah and increase in blessings."
                          - Rasulullah (صلی اللہ علیہ وسلم)‎

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                          • #43
                            Re: Sisters - Is Ambition an Important Characteristic in a Guy?

                            A Muslim should have lofty ambition and strive for his akhirah primarily and at the same time not forget his share of the dunya.

                            Read a book called Lofty Ambitions by Muhammad ibn Ismail al-Muqadam. Unfortunately, it's not translated into English yet.
                            Imam AbdulLatif ibn AbdurRahman rahimullah said, "It is not possible for someone to realize Tawheed and act upon it, and yet not be hostile against the mushrikeen. So anyone who isn't hostile against the mushrikeen, then it can't be said that he acts upon Tawheed, nor that he realizes it." [ad-Durar as-Saniyyah 8/167]

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                            • #44
                              Re: Sisters - Is Ambition an Important Characteristic in a Guy?

                              Originally posted by -Shamil- View Post
                              Assalam Alayykum

                              Is ambition in career an important part of what you look for in a husband? I ask because Ive had this issue for quite a few potentials - with the latest one this point was probably the main reason that we called it off as it was becoming a major point.

                              I dont have ANY ambition when it comes to my career - to put it basically...I dont care. Thats not to say im lazy or I dont work hard - Im saying I have no interest in career progression and making it big.

                              If I pursued my career in the subject of my degree, I could have potentially lucrative salary...I mean really well paid - but I hated my degree and have no desire to follow that path - Im quite happy in a poorly paid job, barely above the national minimum wage because i enjoy it. Plus its not stressful or boring and gives me free time to do other things.

                              Ive realised Iv had this issue of lack of ambition with all potential partners apart from 1 - so is this really important for sisters? If so, whats so important about it. Money? Power? Its something I dont understand.

                              Wa Aalaikum Assalam


                              I think ambition in duniya is senseless. And I think anyone who values ambition in duniya in another person is equally senseless.


                              Seriously, duniya is not akhira. Why would any muslim man hold ambition for a high level career, especially considering that the higher you go the more haram things get.

                              Reserve your ambition and motivation for akhira. That is where the fruits of life lie, not in the position of some corporate tycoon.

                              By the way, I'm not saying not to work hard, I'm talking about having ambition for a high profile career.
                              If you have any questions feel free to PM me!

                              Humililty, Sincerity, and the quest for Truth. There is no purpose in life but to seek the pleasure of Allah.
                              There is a possibility a female might use this account to read something!

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                              • #45
                                Re: Sisters - Is Ambition an Important Characteristic in a Guy?

                                Ok, I don't know whether I'm misunderstanding what you mean by ambition here or not, but I don't think it's bad thing at all to have. It's brilliant actually.

                                Ambition for me, would mean doing the best you can in what you do, with the intent that you get to do something more challenging if you succeed and then doing that to the best of your ability- regardless of whether you're paid the minimum wage or banker's salary.

                                Ambition is the core of motivation and without that, you'll probably not enjoy what you're doing or care for that matter. Depending on what it is you do, you may get away with it or it may be completely detrimental to your career.

                                A doctor with ambition would try to give their patients the best care possible by seeking to learn the newest/best/least invasive medical techniques/investing in the best equipment...basically go out of their way to be the best. That's a brilliant thing and that can be applied to any and all service providers.

                                Heck, ambition is the core of certain professions most notably researchers, scientists, engineers etc. I'm not even sure you can be considered a 'researcher' if you didn't have any ambition...you'd never get any results.

                                I don't see how career ambition here is being tied in with a high-flying, money-making career.

                                Enjoying a challenge in the work place and feeling the motivation to take it on and do your best, is the essence of ambition IMO, regardless of whether you get paid for it or not.
                                Last edited by mizfissy815; 07-12-11, 12:00 AM.
                                "The discovery of truth is prevented more effectively, not by the false appearance of things present and which mislead into error, not directly by weakness of the reasoning powers, but by preconceived notions, opinion, and by prejudice." - Arthur Schopenhauer

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